There are days you think you've finally outgrown your past, that if you walk fast enough and laugh loudly enough, the memories will stop following you. But sometimes, all it takes is a familiar voice to remind you that the past is never as far as you thought.
Yuuto Kase, the boy who was my first love, moved away during the summer break of first year of middle school. I never got a chance to tell him how I felt for him. Since it's been three years and still he is somewhere deep down in my heart. If only I could go back in time for at least for a moment....
As I walked down the third-floor hallway, my sneakers squeaked way too loud on the polished floor. Maybe on purpose—I didn't really care. Everything was fine for me until first semester in second year of my middle school but suddenly everything changed. People started talking and I was alone even before realizing it. It all continued until graduation. Which is why I took this chance and decided to start over in high school. And now, this is new me.
The cafeteria was buzzing, as usual, but all I could focus on was my stomach.
"I'm starved!" I yelled, clutching snacks in my hands.
"Let's hurry back!" I bounced on the balls of my feet, eager to get some food into me.
Beside me, my friend Hinako just shook her head. "You've really got an appetite for this much," she chuckled.
And this other girl too is my friend, Nanami. Then, her eyes widened slightly as she glanced at me. "Eating all that today too?"
When I look back at time, I think first year of middle was the best part of life.
"Makabe!"
The voice rang out clearly, cutting through the gentle hum of the classroom. Makabe-sensei turned with a calm smile, the dependable presence that everyone leaned on when the weight of homework and tests pressed in.
Nearby, students gathered around him, half teasing, half genuinely in need of his help. "Sensei, how are we supposed to finish the English homework by tomorrow?" one asked. Another playfully offered, "Hey, Makabe, want a mint?" His quiet laughter and patient responses brought ease to the room.
"Don't worry, that was nothing," Makabe-sensei assured them gently. "Just be sure to get it done." His steady demeanor made even the most stressful assignments feel manageable.
Nanami and Hinako poked gently, "You say you don't care about guys, but always stare at Makabe sensei." "Are you crushing on him?" Nanami teased, eyebrows raised.
"No way!" she shot back, maybe too quickly, pulling a bigger laugh from the girls.
"Then what is it?" her friend pressed, curiosity obvious in her voice.
"I think it's just because his voice is kinda similar to my first love." I replied with a confused look watching Makabe.
"What? You fell for someone?!"
"How was he like?!" Hinako and Nanami grinning.
"He was short, calm but with a high-pitched voice and kind of reserved".
Well....
While taking a peek at Makabe.
Maybe it's my imagination but Makabe sensei little bit looks like Kase. I should let it go.
On my way back to class thinking, Since I react to the voice and face of that man then might not be over Kase yet.
But I can't stop thinking about where he had gone? But now he's gone I should stop thinking about him
Nearby students whispering about me,
"Hey don't you think Harada from class 3 is cute?"
"Yeah. But she's...." staring.
"No, stop! don't say that. I don't want any attention." I said to myself.
To turn them down I desperately started munching on the melon bread.
"Hey. What are you doing?"
"Can't you wait until we get back?" Hanako and Nanami asked."Watch this. Now what do you think?" Saying to those boys in mind."Just can't control myself." I said.
"Didn't you hear those boys now?"
"You should really try to be more feminine. You'll get a fair number of boys behind you."
Hanako said.
"I hate boys, I can't get along with them."
"Who needs boys if you have–"
Suddenly a guy bumped into me and my bread fell from my hand. The guy swiftly caught the bread without turning back.
What a nice catch.
"Thanks."
"It's nothing."
What?
I looked up, What?
Don't know why? But a thought crossed my
mind:
Was that?
Kase?
No, why I thought that?
It can't be him. He's tall and his voice is also low. Everything is totally different.
But somehow in my chest it felt like....
"Hey Mio, you okay? Let's go"
"There's something I remembered."
"Sorry, you go ahead."
"What? Okay."
His height... and his voice... why? All are wrong.
I started running toward him. Each step inside I taken I just thought.
Why I thought he is Kase? Why I thought he is really Yuuto?
In desperation to not lose him again. In the thought of why, before I knew I was in school courtyard. I stopped.
What if he isn't Kase?
The thought embarrassment passed my mind.
It's fine. I'll face the embarrassment.
Umm....
"Ka..."
"Hey. Hirota" A voice came from my back calling for him.
He stopped and slowly turned towards me. It was him. My eyes were stunned.
Hirota?
"Where are you going?"
Hirota saw back with a smirking face.
But...he looks....like Kase.
In the confusion, I whispered "Guess it wasn't him."
I'm glad I didn't say anything. Maybe my mind was fooling me.
I was turning to go back but then I spotted someone sitting at the nearby bench alone and it was none other than Nise.
Actually her real name is Aina Imada. I feel sorry for her, she is living the same life that I experienced in middle school. She's ostracized by the girls in our class. I think she's strong. She doesn't look bothered. But I don't believe it doesn't bother her.
Our eyes met.
I can't pretend to not see her. I think I should talk with her.
"Hey. Why don't you eat in classroom? Isn't it cold outside?"
Aina replied with a warm smile, "I am fine. It's warm outside.
"Thanks for being concerned."
Huh. I think she is really cute. I had never watched her closely. Her warm smile made me forget all stress.
Of course I absolutely know why they say things like that.
"Is she really cute?"
"Who? Mio? Do you think she's that cute?"
"All boys go behind her like dogs. They are truly idiots."
The painful memories of girls from middle school flashed in front of me. Seeing Aina staying firm and ignoring what the girls say made me respect her from the bottom of my heart because I wasn't able to do that but she can. I wish I could too, but it is not my nature.
Maybe I am like this keychain.
I never want to be in that situation ever again.
"Bye. See you later."
"Okay, Bye."
Friends are must!