The break felt like it had dissolved the moment it started. I was back in my seat, replaying Makabe-sensei's cheerful face while recalling his advice from yesterday: High school will be over before you know it. Do what you can, while you can.
The final bell for break screamed through the hallway—a sharp, unwelcome sound that jolted everyone back to their senses. People who had been loafing by the windows snapped their heads toward the door. Yuuto, who had just ambled back from the hall, slid back into his desk, completely unruffled.
Arai-sensei, our homeroom teacher, walked in as the bell rang. She didn't come through the main entrance; instead, she slid open the back door near the supply closet—maybe a habit to avoid minor traffic near the teacher's desk. She was a slight woman with tired, gentle eyes.
She completely skipped the usual "Hi, everyone." She braced her hands on the desk, her knuckles looking dramatically pale against the polished wood. The silence in the room was instant and total, like fifty students had suddenly remembered they were actually in class. It wasn't hostile or anything—just the standard, here-we-go-again calm before the inevitable, mandatory lecture storm.
"Alright, class. That's the end of our last period for the day," she announced, her voice surprisingly soft. She picked up a sheet of paper from her desk—a sheet that looked suspiciously like the one I'd retrieved for Makabe-sensei. Ah, so it was time for the official announcement. I suddenly felt awkward, like I had been snooping.
She adjusted her glasses. "Before you all rush out the door to your clubs or after-school plans, I have a few important administrative matters to discuss. Primarily, I need to officially announce a new school initiative." She paused, letting the words settle. A few girls were already stuffing their textbooks into their bags, their movements slowing slightly at the mention of an 'initiative.'
"As many of you know, our local mountain, Mt. Nokogiri, has seen quite a bit of tourist and environmental strain in recent years. The school, in cooperation with the city council, is launching a Hill Station Eco Renewal Club."
A wild buzz started in the room. A club? A new club is exciting. A chance to get out of your regular routine.
Arai-sensei waited till the buzz died and continued. "This isn't your average club. It's a specialized initiative that will run for one month, primarily weekend trips. The goal is simple: trail maintenance, native planting, minor site cleaning, etc." She tapped the paper. "More details will be provided on the board. Here's the most crucial part for this class."
She looked up, scanning the room. Her eyes didn't catch me, for which I was momentarily grateful. "We need to elect a Class Representative for the Eco Renewal Project. This person will be the bridge between our class and the project coordinator, who, by the way, is the school's most favorite teacher, Makabe-sensei." She added a small, knowing smile mixed with some jealousy. It was obvious—before Makabe-sensei arrived, Arai-sensei was the students' favorite, but Makabe-sensei stole her spot with enthusiasm twice that of hers. A few students chuckled, picturing Makabe-sensei's boundless energy.
"The Class Rep will also organize the point system and log participation," Arai-sensei explained, her tone firmer. "It's a position of responsibility, requiring commitment and leadership. Think about who in this class has the drive, organizing skills, and commitment to see this through." She let her eyes scan the room once more. I quickly looked down at my desk, pretending to be fascinated by a stray pencil mark. "No one can leave until the class rep is decided," she announced.
"Aw, man!"
"No way!"
Some students started whining.
"I should be the one complaining," Arai-sensei replied, letting out a heavy sigh.
The last thing I wanted was for anyone, especially her, to think of me for a leadership role after my complete social disaster earlier today. You're friendly, enthusiastic, and you've got guts, Makabe-sensei's voice echoed in my mind. I knew with certainty that the trigger had been pulled—that this was the 'action' I needed to take.
Makabe-sensei was right—if I do nothing, the year will be over, and my past will reach out to me again. I glanced at Yuuto. He was leaning back in his chair, one hand tracing the edge of his desk, his expression unreadable. Seeing him reminded me of yesterday's after-school run-in with him.
Do what you can, while you can. "It's not that easy. I really wish I could," I murmured to myself on the way to my place. I was tired—tired of literally everything—that my upper body lost the strength to look ahead. I was just walking somehow. All I did was think and think and think. I was pissed at myself.
"What a gloom!" A familiar voice came from behind. Yes, it was Yuuto. I turned, and his phone started ringing.
"Huh? My phone."
"Hey, what's up?" He answered. "Yeah? Okay, let's go there tomorrow. Bye." As the call ended, another came immediately after. Bip. "Hey, Abe. I just talked to Shimizu." Whaaat? Abe and Shimizu... they just met yesterday, and they were this close already. And I was just... "Haha, seriously? Hilarious! Really? He said that? Haha!" Yuuto laughed to himself. It felt like he was making fun of me, but I knew he wasn't. It must be nice. I was the villainess of the class; everyone (the girls) was afraid of me. My forlorn hope multiplied watching 'this guy' talking. But I couldn't blame him for making friends while I couldn't.
"I'm too blunt, mindless, mean, and scary too. How, how did I end up like this?" I murmured.
"Haha. But I know you're trembling inside," Yuuto said. I stayed in the same posture and tilted my head. "You finished your call. Huh. You're not helping, you know." I was embarrassed enough to feel my face turn completely red.
"Did I say that I would help you?" He questioned.
"I know there's a lot to you." We walked side by side, talking, as he continued, "You were set on starting again, and now you're already quitting like this?"
"H-h-how do you know that?" I stammered, my face burning as I avoided his gaze for a moment. I calmed down and replied, "Well, I don't know what you think of me or anything, but today I realized how powerless, helpless, and... useless I am. I was cast down by everyone. I really want to start over, but maybe I don't have what it takes. I wish someone was there to help me make the class friendlier." I let out a deep breath, showing my frustration.
Yuuto increased his speed. Now he was two steps ahead of me.
"It doesn't affect anyone if you give up now; on the other hand, it doesn't affect anyone if you keep going," his words hit my eardrums. I felt like I was disappointed in a useless thing. When I looked up, all I saw was his back and his shoulder bag. "Nothing has even started yet. You do however you want to do."
Nothing... has even... started...
"Any volunteers?" Arai-sensei's voice brought me back to my senses.
I kept hearing his words in my mind. I should do what I want. What do I want? What is it? Do I wait for someone to fix everything for me? Like in typical rom-com mangas? Or if I want to make a new start, then the one who needs to put effort is... me. It means it will never happen if I am not the first.
I raised my hand with full determination.
"Great. Harada, you're in?"
"Yes."
"Okay, is there any other? If not, then Harada will be now class rep. Harada, you carry it from here."
"Okay."
I pulled back my chair and walked toward the teacher's desk. My hands and legs weren't trembling; they were firm, like they were powered up with confidence. For me, this was a rare moment—like holding a death note in your hands. I kept one hand on the bottom corner of the table and raised the other high, catching most people's attention.
"Alright. We need a vice-president. Are there any volunteers?"
"Are there any volunteers?"
"Aw, man!"
"It's a pain."
"That's boring."
Some students started whining. Now I knew how Arai-sensei felt minutes ago. It was kind of amazing how people avoided eye contact with me. My heart was racing. I had never been called this before; I thought I was kind of a weirdo. Like, who gets excited like this? Yeah, I was nervous too. But now, more than anything, it was starting to feel embarrassing. Standing alone in front of everyone, asking for volunteers like I was charging a spirit bomb and asking others to help—but the Saiyan prince rejects to help. This was almost the same situation. But I couldn't give up yet.
"Together..." I said, pausing briefly to get their attention. I continued, "Let's work to motivate this class."
"Anyone?"
"I will," a voice came from the second-last seat of the first row, and a hand raised. Huh? Yuuto! Why would he? My eyes widened and my mouth slightly opened in surprise.
"Is there any objection?" He asked.
"If there're no other volunteers, we'll go with Hirota? Is everyone fine with it?" I asked aloud. No one objected; instead, they started clapping for him.
Clap! Clap! Clap!
"Okay. Hirota, please help with the next part."
He pulled his chair backward and leaned slightly toward it. Abe and others around him gave their good luck wishes. If this had been the old Yuuto I used to know, it wouldn't have been a question. But this new, mean Yuuto... huh, whatever. He noticed I was staring at him and asked, "What?"
"Um, nothing." The surprise on my face was clearly visible—my eyes widened and mouth opened slightly. "T-thanks." His calm expression didn't change; he just turned toward others.
"Don't be stupid," he said in a voice low enough only I could hear. Urk. It was expected. I wondered why he said something cold to me today. "I just wanted this over quickly and to get out of here," he continued. What a stupid thing to do by becoming vice-president. He did the same as Kou did in the Blue Spring Ride manga—the manga I read when I was 10 and always wished the same story would happen in my life. Maybe God heard my wish because almost everything that happened until now is the same. But God, please, after today, let my life be original. I don't want it to be a copy of my favorite manga.
I lost myself in my thoughts, but Yuuto brought me back with his calm, determined voice: "Let's finish this."