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comedy

Clumsy Beast, Keep Your Paws Off

Su Qinglan sat cross-legged on the grass, holding the chubbiest tiger cub she’d ever seen. “Aww… Look at you,” she whispered, booping its tiny nose. “So cute I could eat you up...” A sudden shadow loomed over her. “What’s so good about this stinky cub?” a deep, amused voice asked. She blinked up… and froze. Towering above her was a tall tiger beast man, his golden eyes narrowed in a lazy, predatory smile. “Let’s have ours,” he said. Su Qinglan’s brain short-circuited. … Ours? OURS?! Before she could process, in the next moment she was hoisted up onto his broad shoulder like a sack of grain and carried straight toward the cave. Su Qinglan was so choked by the suddenness of it all… she forgot to even complain. *** Su Qinglan’s knees knocked together as she stared up at the enormous serpent. Its cold, red eyes narrowed, the flick of its tongue tasting the air between them. “D-Don’t eat me,” she stammered, hugging herself. “I...I’m not tasty… really, I’m stringy and full of… uh… bad cholesterol.” The snake’s head lowered until it was mere inches from her face. Her fox ears twitched wildly. And then, before she could blink...its massive body shimmered, scales turning into bronzed skin and lean muscle. Standing before her was a man so breathtakingly handsome that Su Qinglan’s poor fox eyes watered just looking at him. Su Qinglan swallowed hard, her tail fluffing up in panic. “I… I…” Her voice cracked. Okay, new problem… the snake is hot. She squeezed her eyes shut. “If you… if you really want…” She blurted, her face burning, “…y-you can… take me.” *** One moment Su Qinglan was fighting with the zombie king with all her might. Boom! The next, she woke up in a bizarre beast world… inside the body of a lazy, pampered, fat local tyrant everyone hated. The “original” Su Qinglan had been an arrogant, scheming villainess who spent her days bullying weaker beast women, chasing after handsome males, and terrorizing the tribe kids. Now, thanks to fate’s twisted sense of humor, Qinglan had inherited the body and the bad reputation. But honestly? Being fat in a beast world was still better than starving in the apocalypse. At least here, she could eat. The only problem? In this world, men weren’t just men, they were beastmen. Tall, strong, dangerous… And apparently, every beast woman was expected to have several husbands. The catch? The “original” Qinglan’s antics had scared away every decent male within a ten-mile radius. Armed with her apocalyptic survival instincts, a sharp tongue, and a mysterious system that suddenly activated... "Binding with host…" "Congratulations, host, for successfully arriving in the beast world." Qinglan decided she wasn’t going to cry about fate. If she had to live here, then she’d live big, literally.
Violet_Melody99 · 1.4m Views

REBIRTH : Chasing The Limelight

Elara’s first life crashed hard. Cruel tricks ruined her name, broke her dreams, and turned the whole entertainment world against her. Friends betrayed her. Lovers sold her out. Everyone she trusted stabbed her in the back. The pain piled up until she felt trapped with no way out. One night, she couldn’t take it anymore. She walked to the river and ended it all in the cold, quiet water. Later, proof came out. Messages. Recordings. Everything showed she had been framed. People posted apologies online. But it was too late. She was already gone. The universe, though, clearly has a twisted sense of humor. Because somehow, Elara came back. She woke up in her own past, every awful memory still sharp in her head. Right then she made a promise she would never break: protect her gentle grandfather no matter what, and never let anyone push her to that dark place again. This time she steps into the entertainment world with her head high. She trains harder, sings better, fights smarter. The same people who once crushed her? Now they get to feel the pressure. Love? Not happening. Her heart is locked tight. But why is it that as she rises and shines brighter, handsome, powerful men start circling her—guys who never even glanced at her in her previous life were now hovering around her. The actor smiled at her during a press interview, leaned closer, and said softly, “We should have dinner sometime.” The footballer sent flowers so big they blocked her room door. The surgeon she met at a charity event checked her pulse and then forgot to let go of her wrist. The singer she collaborated with kept calling her name during rehearsals, as if the mic could not hear him well enough. Elara stared at the ceiling that night and sighed. She only wanted to sing. Why did everyone look like they wanted to adopt her, date her, or both? But the worst one came after the concert. The lights had just gone off. Her ears were still ringing. Sweat clung to her neck. She had barely stepped backstage when a shadow blocked her path. She looked up. The CEO of the greatest company in Aurelia stood there. The same man who once said her voice was “not worth investing in.” The same man who did not even know her name before rebirth. Now he held her wrist lightly, but firmly. “Let’s talk,” he said. Elara blinked. “About… sponsorship?” “No,” he replied calmly. “About marriage.” Her brain froze. “…What?” “I will give you everything,” he continued, as if asking for a glass of water. “Resources. Protection. Freedom to sing. Become my wife.” Elara stared at him, her mouth open, her thoughts running in circles. This was not how it was supposed to be. Why was the world now skipping steps? NB: This story takes place in a fictional world. Aurelia is a country. Solmere, Veston, and Starfall City are the three capital cities of Aurelia. Other cities, such as Lorien and Crelou, are smaller cities. Everything in this story is a work of imagination.
SwiftAngel · 4.3k Views

Claimed by the vampire prince

Content Warning: Contains mature themes that may be unsuitable for underaged readers. Excerpt Ragnar finally looked up. His eyes roamed her face, then dropped lower and lingered just a second too long. “Careful, princess. Keep taunting me like that and I’ll start thinking you like our nightly sparring.” “And if I did?” Her voice was soft now. Almost playful. “Would you stop pretending that you don't like it when I challenge you?” He rose from his seat slowly until he stood toe to toe with her. “Tell me something, Circe.” She tilted her chin up. “What?” “If I kissed you right now… Would you slap me, stab me, or kiss me back?” Her breath hitched. “That depends.” “On?” “How good the kiss is.” A pause. Something hummed between them, something neither of them dared name. Ragnar’s gaze dropped to her mouth. “Do you want me to find out?” She smiled, slow and wicked. “Make it worth the risk.” **** She was forced to marry the man who led the attack on her people. After her father is murdered, Circe is forced to leave her home and become a prisoner of the enemy. When she is taken to the enemy territory, she expects to be tortured physically in every way imaginable. But what she hadn't expected was for the vampire king to offer her up as a bride to his illegitimate son, the very same man that had her people slaughtered. It was a fate worse than torture. With her little brother's life on the line and with nowhere to run, Circe is forced to succumb to her fate. Right then she vowed in the name of her dead father to bring her husband to his knees. She would have her revenge, even if it meant destroying herself in the process. From the first time Prince Ragnar laid eyes on Circe, he knew she was going to be trouble. But trouble had never looked so intriguing. She was a puzzle he couldn't solve and that fact only drew him closer. Like a moth to a flame, she threatened to consume him. She would be his very own demise. Circe's presence in Lamora awoke something sinister, a malicious entity roaming the lands. From dusk till dawn, the streets of Lamora becomes engulfed in a strange fog and from within the voice of a woman can be heard. Anyone who wanders out at night when the fog comes, vanishes seemingly without a trace. Never to be found again. what happens when Circe's brother becomes a victim of this evil presence? What happens when Circe has no other choice but to team up with her husband, who she despises, in order to find the truth behind the disappearances and the evil magic plaguing their lands.
Blessing_Nwodo_16 · 362.7k Views