An old monk said, "Great sage Ayusshaika said, 'In the beginning of existence, the existence burst forth from the void. Borne from this overwhelming energy were three divine beings. The teacher of ten thousand worlds, the benevolent Buddha, the lord of divine treasures and pursuer of heavenly mysteries, the ruler of Heaven, the Primordial glistening Heavenly lord, and the just and ashen-trailed lord of the pure blue hell, the Demon God. The universe bestowed upon these beings three gifts. Unto the teacher whom all would learn the dharma in hopes of extinguishing their worries and suffering, a seed was given which would sprout fruits that held the wisdom to release the poison of existence. Unto the Heavenly lord, who found only sorrow in the present, he was given a glistening well within which every beautiful thing existed forever in an endless quantity. Unto the Demon God, for his unbearable empathy and deep thirst for revenge, he was given a lantern that contained mastery over all souls, especially those of wicked and evil beings. These three supreme beings each ruled their separate realms. The Buddha, with his endless pity, lived within the mortal realm. The Heavenly Lord, with his endless disdain, lived within the clean and perfect 33 realms of Heaven. The Demon God, with his endless anger, sought the deepest of the 99 layers of Hell, the pure blue hell. The three beings were lonely and felt restless. Their very existence stemmed from the neediness of all the pitiful creatures of Heaven and Earth. They thus anxiously waited until the Heavens bore the first creation, Man. Each collected a group of followers and taught them their way and their magic. Then came the beasts, the birds, the water creatures, the demons, the angels, and even the treacherous undead! Each found allegiance among the three divinities. However, the Heavenly Lord, seeking to cure his unnatural need for all mortal beings, sought to escape the limits imposed on him by existence. He began the divine war, hoping that by absorbing the other divinities, he would earn the ability to truly be free. However, to all the warriors of the divinities, they were shocked to find the Buddha had disappeared as if snow under the sun. The Heavenly Lord and Demon God had also disappeared while in battle. None of their artifacts remained, nor any other trace. Even their most profound disciples knew what had happened. Yet, regardless of the dye that had been cast onto the pure paper, which was our hearts. We nevertheless waged war, perhaps hoping that by winning, their divinity would return to them in congratulations. The war went on for a million years. The Heavens, the mortal realm, and even the hells, they all fractured, and from their remains came the ten thousand realms. Now the true way once taught by the divinities is lost, and our days are spent in suffering and battle. To this day, the Buddhist sects, the Divine sects, and the demon sects cannot stand one another, fighting and fighting till the last one alive is their own. Yet, even then, the sects, and the myriad races, too, fight for supremacy, the awe of power now that the divinities had been lost too great. Yet, perhaps in pity for our endless struggles, the universe bore a path for even us, undeserving mortals. Now we mortals can ascend to higher realms, bathe in the wisdom of the universe, and become immortal. We become gods, demons, and Buddhas. Though merely fake and pitiful, we have a small respite in our great suffering.'"
With those words pouring into his head, Hajun found it incredibly difficult to sleep. He stared out the window in a foul mood, "This old man cannot spend a day without preaching. In the end, such an intense story has nothing to do with us mortals stuck here at the bottom of a mountain, so why can't he just shut up? As if we have any effect on this legendary story's ending. We mortals are abandoned and scorned by immortals. All we do is farm and gossip, and then get robbed every month by those sects."
He turned to the bigger man next to him and asked, "Gaurim, did you check with your father about the sword I want crafted?"
Gaurim opened his eyes and said, "Big brother, don't ask me. It was such a mess. He hates your father too much lately."
Hajun scoffed, "As if he has ever liked my father or me."
Gaurim showed an awkward smile and said, "However, with the village chief's recent hike in taxes, it went from dislike to hate."
Hajun complained, "Don't blame my family. We don't have any real power or voice. We are just representatives of the demon sect. Those fellows are too disdainful to speak to us and use my family. In the end, we earn the ire of the village, and the immortals can just stay high above like pure white clouds without a speck of dirt!"
Gaurim's face twisted, and he said, "Big brother, you really shouldn't talk about the immortals like that. You know their temper. With a wave of a finger, heads go rolling. Uncle Farum told me that when he was younger, a lad in his school once cursed the immortals because they had driven his family to ruin from the high taxes that season, and then that very night he was struck by lightning. They say the immortals are venerated by Heaven for following the destined way, and that even the Heavens cannot stand a word against them."
Hajun laughed and then sneered, "If that was true, I'd have been struck a hundred times by lightning already. I curse them in my thoughts all the time. It's all hogwash, rumors to control the mortals, to make them obedient. As strong and powerful as they are, they are still not the Heavens themselves; they cannot tame men. None can hinder the fury and rebellion of the heart, not even the heavens; all one can do is compensate it with small pleasures and scary stories."
Gaurim said, "Perhaps the Heavens do not strike you because you don't truly despise them. You are, after all, just angry because you are jealous. You want to be powerful and awesome, but you aren't. You must feel disgust at the world. It's a sincere and sympathetic cry."
Hajun poked Gaurim in the ribs with his elbow and said, "You bastard, how dare you try to analyze your big brother! Regardless, that makes the story even less likely. That fellow from your uncle's story said that fellow's family was ruined by the greed of the immortal sects, then he has the most sincere and sympathetic rage!"
Gaurim scratched his head and said, "Perhaps. Though perhaps that is his destiny too. Being disobedient to it is to insult the wisdom of Heaven, too."
Hajun stood up and kicked Gaurim.
Gaurim stared up angrily, his brows wrinkled in pain.
Hajun, however, showed a fierce expression and shouted, "What a damnable destiny, and a damnable Heaven! If suffering and anguish are something predestined, how awful existence is, how despicable these things you fools worship are! How unruly you are to scoff at another's torment and lecture them on being disobedient! Let your family too fall into ruin and see if you can be so obedient! Fool!"
Hajun then threw a fierce look at the angry monk teaching the class, which silenced the old man. Hajun then scoffed and said, "Injustice, whether decreed by Heaven or by Man, must earn your anger and revolt. For whom suffer today may soon look just like you! Yet, you are too busy hoping and praying, and bowing, trying to fade into the background. You all are too afraid and too scornful of the anguish of the many innocents! How pathetic. You monk, you rave always about the three divinities, but what care do you have for us men who suffer under the fist of immortality? That pathetic power, which just like money separates us, labels us as worthy and unworthy! How ridiculous. Instead of trying to raise us to fight for one another, you lecture us to revere about that pitiful path that is so far away and secluded to a select few only! I do not care about immortality; all I care about is justice."
A classmate scoffed, "It is your father only who robs us of money, sending us all to hell. Justice? How laughable, coming from your mouth, young master! Haha."
Hajun said, "My family just speaks the word of the immortals! Is a lion a murderer? No, that is the role thrust onto it!"
The classmate said coldly, "As if your family doesn't have a reward, you speak as if you are weary and forced. You speak as if it is a burden. Why don't you hand it over to me? Such hardship, even I could enjoy it, haha."
Hajun lowered his head and said, "I…"
The monk nodded to the classmate who had spoken up and then said, "Hajun, go home! Tell your father to see me. I need to talk to him about your behavior. As if it isn't bad enough to be causing a ruckus, you insult the immortals. Without them, we would be eaten and chewed by the ferocious mongrels of the other races."
Hajun angrily raised his head, staring at everyone. However, he sighed and threw his head to the side.
Kicking the chair away, he walked out. Gaurim looked conflicted for a moment, before following behind Hajun.
Hajun stared at Gaurim and said, "You don't have to follow me. You'll get in trouble. This whole village makes a fuss about learning about the immortals."
Gaurim smirked and said, "It's my fault you made a fuss. I shouldn't have riled you up. I've known you long enough to know your buttons."
Hajun stopped and turned back with an annoyed expression. He tapped Gaurim's head and said, "What's wrong with your brain? You seriously think I am that stupid? I know you said that to cover for my ass. You've always been like that. Trying your hardest to clean my messes. Making me look like a bug for being so annoyed."
Gaurim tapped Hajun's head and said, "What's wrong with your brain? Don't you know we're friends?"
Hajun stared at Gaurim. He turned around and walked away. He said, "Idiot, we are brothers."
Gaurim laughed and said, "Oh yeah! You're right."
Gaurim caught up to Hajun and said, "Not to mention in life, I've known you to make a wrong choice. Whether it's fate, luck, or intelligence, somehow you make it through the worst circumstances where there isn't any hope. I'd trust you over the village, over immortals, too."
Hajun stared at Gaurim and said, "Then follow me, little brother, where we go, we seek a thousand thousand flowers and sunsets."
Gaurim scoffed and asked, "Brother, can't you say a thousand concubines, a hundred wives, and a dozen mistresses instead of flowers and sunsets?"
Hajun punched Gaurim in the arm and said, "As if you could enjoy them all! You'd be panting like a dying dog after a single one, let alone all of them. Not to mention knowing how your father acts in front of your mother, you'll be henpecked. I can't imagine enduring that with one woman, let alone with so many."
Gaurim felt a cold shiver run down his back and said, "Well, you're right again."
Hajun said, "Gaurim, remember this!"
Gaurim clapped and said, "Wow… It's another life lesson."
Hajun stared fiercely at the sarcastic Gaurim until he looked on with expectant and fervent eyes.
Hajun then said, "Even the greatest beauty in the world will turn dull after a dozen dozen meetings. Even the sweetest drink will turn bitter after a dozen dozen drinks. In life, such things are too fickle and temporary. Worse for us mortals, beauty could even rot. In the end, all you are left with is the heart and soul. They say something sweet only becomes more beautiful the longer you look at it, because what is so beautiful is not earthly, it is something powerful, it is love. Love can withstand time and dullness. Do not seek beauty alone, for then, after a thousand nights of fawning, all you will be left with is anger and bitterness. After all, no matter how beautiful the face, if the heart is not beautiful, then all you will have are restless nights filled with rage. I do not seek a harem, no, I seek only one person, someone with whom I may last this pathetic and small life. Someone who cherishes and supports me, just as I do for them. Someone who is fiercely and sincerely strong of spirit, and beautiful of soul. Someone with whom I can endure ten thousand lifetimes."
Gaurim stared at Hajun and said, "It's a sweet thing, brother. Though for people like me without such lofty ambitions, we can only fill the lack of quality with quantity. I'd still prefer my harem."
Hajun sighed and turned away. He said, "So what do you reckon we do now?"
Gaurim slapped his stomach and asked, "Get some food?"
Hajun shook his head and complained, "Come on, let's find something else to do. After such aggravation, I need a distraction."
Gaurim sighed and said, "Yes, yes."
The two walked around the village, and then Gaurim asked, "Should we go into the forest? I doubt we'd find anything interesting here."
Hajun shook his head and explained, "No. There have been rumors of a fierce man-eating tiger in the forest. It's better to be safe and frustrated than dead and frustrated."
Gaurim asked, "Shouldn't the frustration disappear with death?"
Hajun laughed and asked, "If you died in the mouth of a stupid tiger at the peak of your youth. Without having chased passion and love, who wouldn't be frustrated? Even in the next life, you'd be born with a chip on your shoulder. Don't you know, that's why some people are so quick to get angry, it's because in their previous life they had to stomach all of it, and now with this second chance they want to get it all out before it's too late. Of course, to the stinging ears of us normal people."
Gaurim rolled his eyes and asked, "When did you become normal, brother? You aren't refined either; you are quick to anger just as easily."
Hajun wagged his finger and said, "However, I don't go ahead and spit and scorn others easily! I might get angry easily, but I just keep it in, stuffing it deep inside until someone pushes me over the edge, and then… Kaboom! I explode! Some people though they are just always shouting, full of negativity, and unbearably rude. The number of times I've wanted to stab that kind of person in the face is a bit embarrassing."
Gaurim asked, "Why is it embarrassing? I dream of killing my cousins."
Hajun said, "Obviously, because I am the great and glorious destined one, with my right hand I hold the blade of justice and with my left the record of the evil ones punished. If I allow such violence to overtake me, then I am no better than a rogue undertaking such pitiful personal vengeance. I should, even if it may be pathetic and cowardly, just lower my head. It is not for them, but for myself, that killing and murder should be out of my head."
Gaurim laughed and said, "Big brother, what a funny thing to say, the great and glorious destined one!"
Hajun shook his head in embarrassment and said, "I merely meant to exaggerate my point with some dramatic flair."
Gaurim snickered until Hajun's blazing eyes pierced into his heart, causing him to cough awkwardly.
Gaurim then shrugged and said, "Then it's a good thing I don't plan to be a good person, or a just person. I plan to enjoy life to its fullest! If I see a bastard standing in front of me, I'll kick him away, if I see a bastard barking in my face, I'll just break his nose, if a bastard tries to harm or insult me, I'll just break his neck!"
Hajun laughed and sneered, "Living like that without strength is like putting on the noose yourself. It's fine to act unbearably, but you'd better anticipate the consequences. You'll be targeted and then hung. Of course, if you become a governor in the nearby town, or even a strong martial artist, or even perhaps if you are supremely lucky, an immortal, then you can commit any amount of evil, and people will still bow their heads and call you virtuous. In this world, the evil and guilty people are not always evil, but rather the poor, the ugly, and the sickly. Whereas the ones who are blessed and virtuous are the rich, the beautiful, and the strong!"
Gaurim slapped his gong-like stomach and said, "I am healthy!"
Hajun scoffed, "You are poor and weak. Strength does not solely mean physical strength. The governor is strong because he has a humongous personal guard for his personal vengeance, and he controls your income. He can make a poor man rich, and a rich man poor. Similarly, when one is rich enough, all these worldly affairs turn irrelevant; you can buy happiness and security, call down assassins on unruly government officials, etc. A strong fist is, of course, amazing, but it must be backed by social strength. In the end, this is not the jungle where the anger and injustice we feel can be easily addressed. Laws and regulations bind our passion, turning justice mute and useless! They are praised, though only the strong make gains."
Gaurim shook his head and said, "Enough of this, my head is aching. I'd rather not worry about such things. Living day by day is enough for me."
Hajun said, "Fine. Though let me warn you. Living for the day alone is perhaps the most insidious way of living. You become deluded and confused by the steady flow of time and peace, you become complicit and complacent in endless issues, and eventually, you are swallowed up by what you've ignored. One cannot run away from their demons, for the further you run, the closer it comes. One must stand steady and face their anguish and accept its existence, and find a single refrain from its terrible ache."
Gaurim nodded and said, "I have learned, brother."
Hajun looked angrily at Gaurim and asked, "Did you say that to shut me up?"
Gaurim coughed and looked away.
Hajun asked, "You bastard, look here!"
Gaurim began to slowly walk away, to Hajun's anger.
Hajun said, "Come here now!"
Gaurim began sprinting towards the forest, and Hajun's scold quickly turned into worry, "Bastard, I told you to come here… You idiot, I told you there is a man-eating tiger in the forest! Come here! I promise I won't talk anymore!"
Hajun followed Gaurim into the forest and surveyed the environment carefully. His steps were careful and slow. He thought, "I can't exactly call out to Gaurim. Who knows what's listening?"
He sighed and cursed Gaurim before continuing on.
He suddenly heard a loud crash, and a deep roar echoed.
He stopped in place, a cold wave washing over his body, freezing him in place.
"That sound. It was the tiger! There really is a tiger in this forest! Damn it!"
He walked backwards, but then he heard Gaurim's blood-curdling voice screaming.
Hajun stopped in place again, not moving forward, not moving back.
In his heart, a cacophony of thoughts made him go crazy, "What am I doing! I need to run away, I'll die!"
"What am I doing? Gaurim needs my help, he'll die!"
The noises bashed against his head, and the screams and roars got louder and louder.
Hajun said aloud, "I can't do anything, I don't even have a weapon. We'll both just die. If I run to the village… No, Gaurim will be dead by the time I get back! Then what? Sacrifice my life trying to save his? Why should I?"
Hajun laughed, "In the end, all things die in the face of conflict. I spewed such endless nonsense. Yet, I can't save my best friend, my brother."
Hajun turned around and walked away, biting his lip.
He wondered at that moment what would be the consequence of this one decision.
He wondered, "A life of scorn, of regret? A life, regardless, isn't it?"
He gripped his fist, "It's my fault, it's because I am weak. If I were strong, I would do it! How laughable, my excuse is weakness! If strength makes a man good, then a man was never good; he was merely a coward."
He did not want to die; he did not want to be a coward. He did not know what to do.
He gripped his wildly beating heart, the sweat washing him and his clothes. He couldn't walk steadily, and his vision twisted, making him even more nauseous than the guilt had already made him.
He looked back, but looked away, again and again.
He kept walking slowly, hesitantly, but he continued walking away.
He cursed in his mind, "No, no, no, no! Please don't run away, please, please, please! I don't want to live like this!"
However, his heart had been made up, regardless of his will. He kept walking away, because the fear covered him whole.
Suddenly, the screams stopped, and all he could do was turn around in horror, his eyes staring out in both shame and fear!
He started to run, panting like a dog, his eyes covered in tears.
He only calmed down once he got back to the village, and snuck back into his home. He rushed to his room and curled up into a ball.
His eyes were wide open, filled with such terrifying emptiness.