Luka's phone buzzed with a curt message: "Hello, I left a package for you at the supermarket at the community entrance."
Grumbling under his breath, Luka headed downstairs, irritated by the increasingly lazy delivery service. Gone were the days when couriers bothered to call out from the lobby. Now, they just dumped packages at the community entrance, the promise of door-to-door delivery a hollow jest.
He got it—express delivery volumes were astronomical, and couriers were stretched thin—but that didn't stop him from muttering a few choice words. Understanding the problem was one thing; venting his frustration was another.
At the supermarket, Luka's irritation flared. The package was a massive one-meter-square box, the kind that screamed "good luck moving this." If he hadn't been on good terms with the store owner and borrowed a cart, he'd have been stuck.
After hauling the box home and returning the cart, Luka finally cracked it open. His expression flickered between surprise, delight, and utter confusion.
Inside was another box—a sleek, metallic one, brimming with high-tech vibes and sharp, ornate lines. It had a rugged, mechanical aesthetic, adorned with a double-headed eagle emblem on the front.
"What in the world is this?" Luka muttered, baffled. "I didn't order any Warhammer merch." He lifted the metal box from the cardboard, surprised at how light it was despite its imposing size.
"No manual? No latch? How do you even open this thing?" Luka ran his hands over the box, searching for a clue. His fingers brushed a skull-shaped ornament on the side, and suddenly, the box—or rather, the skull—sprang to life.
"Gene verification failed. Activation denied," a mechanical voice intoned.
"Authorization activated. Current level: I. Available unit score: 0/500."
"Current task: Inactive."
"Please complete the novice guide and activate the mission promptly, for the Emperor!"
The booming "For the Emperor!" nearly sent Luka to his knees in mock reverence. He caught himself, chuckling nervously. "Okay, who's pranking me?"
He inspected the box again, marveling at its craftsmanship. "This is metal, top-tier work. Gotta cost thousands…" He tapped it, then ran his hands over the skull ornament, which felt eerily like real bone. "No way this is a real skull. Resin? 3D-printed? How do I even start this thing?"
Please submit your genetic sample.
The skull's eyes glowed red, its jaw popping open to reveal a small slot, just wide enough for a finger.
"You've got to be kidding me. Blood-drip authentication? Really?" Luka hesitated, then, with a grimace, slid his finger in.
"Ow!" He yanked his hand back, a tiny prick on his finger oozing blood. "It actually pricked me!" He sucked on the wound, scrambling for a Band-Aid while cursing the box's theatrics.
The box hummed, its voice resuming. "Gene sample recorded. Verification complete: 100% human, no subspace contamination, no genetic mutations detected."
"Permissions bound. Current level: I. Available unit score: 0/500."
"Authorization activated. Current level: I. Available unit score: 0/500."
"Current task: Inactive."
"Please complete the novice guide promptly, for the Emperor!"
The box whirred, its top splitting along the golden eagle emblem, unfolding into a rectangular platform two meters long and one meter wide, nearly filling Luka's small apartment. He stumbled back, catching himself against a shelf of model kits.
If the box was impressive, what happened next was jaw-dropping. The skull detached, floating before him, its mechanical hum unnerving. Luka froze, speechless.
"Is this… a servo skull?" he whispered, reaching out cautiously. The skull's eyes flashed red, scanning him with twin beams.
"Facial and body data recorded. Begin novice guidance?"
"What are you?" Luka demanded, heart racing. "What's going on?"
As a Warhammer fan, Luka had shelves lined with models worth thousands, but a real servo skull floating in his face was another level. He loved the lore, sure, but the Warhammer universe was a nightmare—no sane person would want to live there. Yet, the idea of donning power armor and swinging a chainsword for humanity's glory? That was hard to resist.
The skull's eyes flickered, and a mechanical arm extended from its base, retrieving a parchment scroll sealed with a purity seal from the box. It handed it to Luka.
"This craftsmanship…" Luka marveled, half-joking. "If I post this in the group chat, they'll lose it." He broke the seal and unrolled the parchment.
A burst of golden light erupted, dazzling him. "Damn it!" he shouted, shielding his eyes, a string of colorful curses following as the light faded.