I was already used to the rejection emails.
At this point, I didn't even open them with hope anymore… just a quiet expectation of disappointment.
Still, I opened the last one.
> "We regret to inform you…"
I didn't bother reading the rest.
Another one.
I let out a tired breath and slumped back into the chair, my phone slipping loosely from my fingers.
I didn't know what I was doing wrong. Or maybe I did. Maybe life just wasn't being fair to me.
I looked up and met my mother's eyes. She was watching me from across the room, her expression soft… but heavy.
"Another rejection?" she asked gently.
I couldn't trust my voice, so I just nodded.
She gave me a small smile, the kind that tried too hard to be strong.
"It's okay, baby. You'll get something good soon. Don't worry."
I forced a smile back at her.
But it didn't reach my eyes.
I stepped outside our small house, the heat of the sun hitting my face immediately.
This wasn't the life I had imagined.
This wasn't the life I had promised her.
All those years… all her sacrifices… all the nights she stayed awake making sure I studied, making sure I had a future.
And now?
She was sick.
And I couldn't even afford to take her to a proper hospital.
She kept saying it wasn't serious.
But I could see it.
The way her body had grown weaker… the way her voice had lost strength.
Even the drugs I managed to buy weren't helping anymore.
A tear slipped down my cheek. Then another.
I buried my face in my arms, my shoulders shaking slightly.
I felt like a failure.
My mind drifted back to school.
To my coursemates.
Girls who never seemed to struggle… girls who had money, nice clothes, good phones… a soft life.
I wasn't a child. I knew what they were doing.
And I had been approached too—more than once.
Rich men.
Married men.
Promises wrapped in temptation.
But I always said no.
Because my mother had warned me.
She made me promise I would never become that kind of girl.
One of those girls… used to be my friend.
We had struggled together once.
But somehow… she made it out. Or at least, it looked like she did.
---
I picked up my phone and dialed her number.
It rang once. Twice. Then she picked up.
"Hello, baby girl!" her voice came through, bright and carefree. "What's up? How have you been?"
"I've been okay…" I said, though even I could hear the lie in my voice.
And then… I broke.
I told her everything. About the rejections. About staying stuck at home. About my mother.
She listened. Sympathized.
Then I asked, "What about you?"
She laughed.
"I've been good. I just got a new apartment… bought an iPhone… you know, soft life."
My eyes widened slightly.
"That's amazing! Did you get a job?"
Her laughter this time was louder.
"A job? Please. I don't do slavery."
I frowned. "Then… how are you affording all this?"
There was a pause.
Then she hummed softly.
"You won't understand."
"Please," I said quickly. "I'm ready to do anything. Just tell me."
And she did.
"Married men."
My stomach turned, but I stayed quiet.
"It's easy," she continued. "Find one. Make him fall for you. Take care of his needs, and he'll take care of you."
She paused, then added:
"And don't forget,you're not there for love. It's money we're after. Besides… why would you fall in love with a married man?"
I forced a small sound, pretending to listen.
But inside? I felt disgust.
After the call, I dropped my phone and shook my head.
No.
There was no way.
I could never live that kind of life.
Not after everything my mother told me.
Not after the promise I made.
I decided that would be the last time I ever spoke to her.
Deep down, I had always suspected it.
Now I knew.
But as I sat there… alone with my thoughts…
one question refused to leave my mind.
What if… this was the only way out?
Because life… wasn't fair.