The skies cracked open with fire and fury.
Above the broken ruins of the Eldenridge battlefield, two figures clashed in a blaze of divine and infernal energy. One, clad in radiant silver armor that shimmered with the blessing of the heavens. The other, wreathed in flowing crimson robes, his obsidian horns piercing through the storm clouds.
Sakura the Radiant Blade, humanity's final hope, brandished her sword of holy light with a glare that could level mountains.
Ragna the Obsidian Flame, Demon Lord of the Ninth Circle, smirked with all the arrogance of a man who'd burned down pantheons for fun.
"You die here, demon," Sakura said, voice trembling with the weight of destiny.
"You wish, holy girl," Ragna purred. "After all this fighting, don't you think we've built something special between us?"
Sakura's face turned red.
"That's not how war works!!"
Ragna dodged a blade slash and winked. "You sure? You keep yelling my name like we're in bed—AH—okay okay! No more flirting!"
Their battle raged across the skies, their powers colliding like gods waging their final war.
Then…
Boom.
A portal. A spiral of energy, unstable, ancient, and definitely not part of the script. It yawned open between them—sucking in magic, clouds, and everything nearby.
"What the—"
"Ragna, you idiot, what did you—"
And then they were gone.
To the world they left behind, they were dead. Enemies lost to the void.
But in reality… they landed in Tokyo.
---
Present Day – Tokyo, Japan
"Ragna, for the love of God, IT'S BURNING!!"
A thick column of black smoke coiled from the kitchen like the herald of the apocalypse. The fire alarm screamed. Again.
"Calm down, calm down!" Ragna waved a spatula dramatically, his apron reading 'HOT STUFF – DEVILISH CHEF'. "I'm just bringing out the flavor!"
"You're summoning an arson charge!"
"Cooking is an art, Sakura. You wouldn't understand. You once tried to microwave rice in tinfoil."
"That was one time!"
Lily peeked her head into the kitchen from the hallway, clutching her magical bunny plush, Sir Floofles. She blinked up at the chaos with big sparkly eyes and tilted her head.
"Papa burned the curry again?"
Ragna knelt in front of her, coughing dramatically through smoke. "Lily, my sweet dark heir, listen well. True curry must first face annihilation, then rise anew—like a phoenix!"
Sakura dragged him by the collar with one hand. "You're banned from metaphors and the stove. Again."
"But my curry—!"
"Your curry smells like war crimes."
Lily giggled and tugged on Sakura's skirt. "Mama, can I use a time-freeze spell to go buy crepes?"
"No."
Lily pouted, eyes glowing faintly with magical energy. "Just a little freeze? I promise not to trap the cashier in a temporal bubble like last time!"
"You turned that poor boy into a popsicle for five minutes."
"He gave me banana instead of strawberry," Lily muttered, looking away. "That's practically treason."
Sakura sighed. Ragna smirked. Lily beamed. Just another normal day.
---
Later that evening, the family gathered in the living room, eating emergency instant noodles. Sakura sat with crossed legs, still in her office blouse and pencil skirt, exhaustion dripping off her like dew.
Ragna lounged shirtless on the couch, flipping TV channels with his tail. That tail had gotten them into trouble many times.
"Why are you shirtless?"
"Fan service," he said without missing a beat.
"Put on a shirt before the neighbors call the police again."
"Oh? Is the former Heroess shy? You didn't seem so bothered that night we—"
Sakura hurled a slipper at his face. "Lily is in the room!!"
Lily, meanwhile, was sitting between them, drinking strawberry milk with her cheeks puffed up adorably. "You two flirt a lot. Do all married couples flirt like that?"
Sakura choked on her noodles. "We're not married!"
"We're cohabitating partners bound by magical incident," Ragna said dramatically.
"Also known as: roommates who got magically pregnant," Sakura grumbled.
"You say it like it's not romantic."
"It isn't!!"
Lily raised her hand. "But I saw you kiss Mama when you thought she was asleep last week."
Sakura froze. Ragna's tail wagged. "Traitor."
Sakura flushed red. "I-I did not… I mean, you kissed me! And I wasn't asleep!! I was… resting aggressively!"
Lily leaned over and whispered to her bunny: "I think Mama and Papa are super in love."
Sir Floofles remained silent. He was a plush. But Lily swore he nodded.
---
Flashback: Their Arrival in Japan – 5 Years Ago
They woke up, dazed and half-naked, in the middle of Yoyogi Park.
A man walked by with his corgi. The dog barked.
Ragna looked at his own reflection in a pond. "...Where's my horn? My wings? My floating skull throne?"
Sakura grabbed his arm, panicked. "My holy sword's gone! I can't even summon light! Are we in some sort of cursed illusion!?"
"No. We're in... Japan," Ragna muttered. He picked up a discarded magazine nearby. "...This woman is wearing less than my battle armor."
"You're reading a gravure magazine!?"
"Just researching culture, Heroess. For diplomacy."
They had to live in the park for three days until Sakura figured out how to use a vending machine and threatened a conbini manager into giving them temp jobs. Ragna learned to cook. Sakura got an ID through very... questionable means. Eventually, they moved into a small apartment.
Then came Lily.
"How does that even happen?!" Sakura screamed when the magical egg burst into flame and left behind a baby with glowing pink eyes.
"I swear it was the portal! Or fate! Or maybe divine punishment for that night when we—"
"DON'T TALK ABOUT THAT NIGHT!!"
---
Back to Present
That night, after Lily had gone to bed (after accidentally levitating her plushie and then using it to hover over her bed like a spaceship), Sakura sat on the balcony with a warm can of beer.
Ragna joined her, wearing a proper shirt this time—though he left the top three buttons open just to annoy her.
"I didn't mean to burn the curry," he said.
She sighed. "I know."
"I did mean the kiss."
She didn't respond.
"You didn't slap me."
"I was asleep."
"You smiled."
"You're hallucinating."
They sat in silence for a moment.
Below them, Tokyo glowed. The neon buzz of life. Normalcy. Nothing like the war-torn lands they left behind. And yet, this place... it had become home.
"…She's happy here," Sakura whispered.
"Yeah. She's terrifyingly powerful, but happy."
"…So are we."
Ragna looked at her.
She didn't deny it this time.
Suddenly, a loud BOOM came from Lily's room.
"Oops!" came her voice. "I accidentally made Sir Floofles sentient!"
Ragna leapt up. "NOT AGAIN!"
Sakura groaned. "I'll get the holy seals."
They rushed inside.
Sir Floofles glowed ominously.
Lily waved. "He says he's hungry for blood pudding!"
---
To Be Continued...
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