"You said you're having lunch together to celebrate graduation?"Kazane Arata stroked his chin, cigarette dangling from his lips like some half-baked detective. "Or was it Naruto who actually invited you?"
"He invited me?"
Haruno Sakura was about to nod, but the shopkeeper cut her off, looking dead serious."Impossible. Absolutely impossible. That brat told me himself he doesn't have any friends."
"Hey, hey, hey!" Naruto nearly blew a gasket. "Uncle owner, that's way too far! I do have friends! Sakura's my best friend!"
"And what about the guy next to you?" Arata flicked his eyes toward Sasuke.
"Hmph." Sasuke crossed his arms, snorted, and radiated peak "keep away from me" energy. "Don't get the wrong idea. I just came along with Sakura."
(He came with me! Sasuke-kun came with me!)In Sakura's mind, a little chibi version of herself did a victory dance while waving a flag. Somewhere in her heart, Ino was already losing.
Outwardly, though, Sakura kept her cool—if you ignored the steam puffing off her head.
"Uh, Haruno Sakura," Arata said with a raised brow. "You're literally smoking."
"Eh?" Sakura frantically patted her head, found nothing, then realized she'd just been trolled.
Naruto groaned. "Uncle shopkeeper, could you not be so weird? First time meeting Sakura and you're already teasing her? Smoke out of her head—seriously? She's cute, not a chimney!"
Arata coughed into his fist, trying to look solemn. "Ahem. Just a joke. Anyway, since you're here, I'll cook lunch for you. Guaranteed satisfaction!"
His eyes lit up. His grin widened. His hands rubbed together with the excitement of a man who firmly believed he was a five-star chef.
Naruto went pale. "No! Absolutely not! Let's just… let's just eat outside, okay?" He grabbed Sakura and Sasuke like he was rescuing them from imminent doom. They looked confused, clearly not in on the danger.
"STOP!" Arata's shout froze Naruto in place like a deer in headlights. "What's that supposed to mean? You think my food's bad?!"
Naruto's face crumpled. "S-Shop owner… I beg you… spare me…"
"If you don't explain yourself, you're not leaving!" Arata slammed his fist into his palm. "I cook out of kindness, and before your classmates even try a bite, you're already slandering me?!"
Sakura and Sasuke blinked at each other. They'd come here out of curiosity—Naruto had been acting weird lately, after all. He'd mentioned his eccentric boss, his gaming nights, his mysterious move into the store… and naturally, they wanted to meet this so-called culprit.
Turns out Naruto was right—the boss was eccentric.
But what baffled them now was Naruto's sheer terror at the idea of Arata cooking. Why was he trembling like a man facing execution?
Naruto remembered very well. The second night after moving in, Arata had insisted on a celebratory feast. The food had smelled divine, tasted even better—Naruto had sworn it was restaurant quality.
And then he spent the entire night praying to the porcelain god. The toilet had never been so overworked. He thought he'd never leave alive.
So yeah—trauma. Pure trauma.
Arata finally pieced it together and sighed. Right. His curse. He could eat his own cooking fine, but anyone else? Food poisoning, guaranteed. Back in his old world, people needed hospitalization. Poor Naruto had survived a whole night of hell, which only proved he was the shōnen protagonist.
"Fine," Arata relented with a wave. "We'll have hotpot. There are ingredients upstairs."
Naruto's relief was instant. "Yes! Hotpot's great!" No risk. No poison. Just glorious, safe boiling soup.
The shop closed early, and Arata led the three kids upstairs. Naruto got drafted as sous-chef, since the rule was simple: if Arata cooked, it was doomed. Hotpot needed no genius—just ingredients, broth, and a burner.
While the pot bubbled, the three genin chatted. Naruto told school stories with Sakura chiming in. Sasuke? He just sat in silence, eating like the stoic little emo prince he was.
Still, Arata noticed the glances. Naruto sneaking peeks at Sakura. Sakura sneaking peeks at Sasuke. Sasuke sneaking peeks at… Naruto.
The drama triangle practically wrote itself.
Naruto thought: Yes! Same team as Sakura! More time together!Sakura thought: Yes! Same team as Sasuke! More time together!Sasuke thought: Why the hell am I stuck with the dead last? Who the hell put this team together?!
Arata just watched, slurping noodles. This world really was too cruel. Kids barely out of diapers already trained to kill, and here they were, bickering over crushes while prepping for blood-soaked missions.
Better to stay home. Safer. Simpler.
Breaking the silence, Arata leaned back and asked casually: "So, Naruto, you mentioned your teacher told you to wait in class this afternoon. What's his name? Maybe I know the guy."
Naruto blinked. Then blinked again. He and the others exchanged glances. Right. The academy hadn't announced their jōnin instructors yet.
Arata sighed. "Figures. Guess I'll just find out later."