CHAPTER 1
The ceiling kept tilting as he lay there on the hard bed. Roaring flames and char were lodged in his mind and lungs. The screams had already gone silent, and the smell of cooked flesh was replaced by the cool, fresh breeze coming in from the open window. It was chilling, invading his lungs, but it was better than the heat's choke. The air was able to push back the weight of accusations deep within his chest. He could breathe freely again. Shame and regret were quickly forgotten for a moment, making him feel guilty. He wasn't supposed to be happy, enjoying the ventilation, when he had caused the whole thing to happen. They were all dead because of him, and there was nothing he could do to save them, not even himself. He was such a burden to the kind souls around him, those who had his best interests at heart, and now they were gone. The snore from the other person in the room gave him comfort, and he wished not to go back to that fire. If this was the end, then perhaps it was good.
Time passed very quickly, and dawn had already crept in. Jaden was quietly enjoying the peace when the other man's snore hitched, softened into a quiet murmur, and he stirred awake.
"What the hell!" The man jumped up from his bed and quickly glanced at Jaden, flashing a silly smile. His dense, curly hair was like a tangled halo. "I overslept. We can still make it today." He turned around and went to look for water so they could bathe.
Jaden's body stiffened seconds after the man left. His eyes widened, and his heart drummed faster. That was his childhood friend, Ranulf, who had died three years ago. How was this possible? Ranulf had died protecting him on their way to the Ashkar's eastern border camp. Was he reliving his sad memories to atone so he could move on? His thoughts were cut off when Ranulf entered the room with the bucket in hand, taking it to the bathroom.
Ranulf quickly came out. "Alright, go take your bath first while I pack."
Jaden moved on auto-pilot to the bathroom and took his bath quickly, or so he thought.
"Jaden?" Ranulf knocked on the door while Jaden was wrapping the towel around his waist.
"You've been in there for long," Ranulf's voice hummed through the door. Then Jaden opened the door, almost colliding with a firm chest. The lower half was covered with a towel. He stared at Ranulf in awe.
"I'm done packing." Jaden's eyes latched onto Ranulf's face, still in disbelief, not even registering any words heard. How is this real?
"You can quickly dress up and wait for me." His broad shoulders quickly brushed past Jaden, and he went into the bathroom, leaving Jaden standing there. Jaden stood there in a daze and only left when he heard water splashing.
When he was done dressing, he heard Ranulf coming out. Glowing bronze skin caught the light, with broad shoulders and defined muscles that were not brute. His curls, slightly longer than Jaden's, were dripping wet. Even after bathing, he looked endearingly rough, just as Jaden remembered him to be. He watched as Ranulf got dressed and picked up their belongings.
If he remembered correctly, this was the inn they stayed at in Ashkar, and they were planning to meet Marcus in the border camp. Dizziness washed over Jaden as he remembered that. Today was a point in time, three years ago, when everything started. They, or rather Jaden, had left Lorynth to surprise Marcus. Upon their arrival, Marcus's fury erupted over Jaden's unannounced visit. Since that outburst, Jaden hadn't seen his mate and was desperate to apologize. He had even pressed Ranulf to accompany him to the military camp, hoping to finally corner Marcus and express his remorse for coming to Ashkar without informing him. Oh, how stupid he was. The man was clearly gaslighting him because he didn't want Jaden to know he was married to a female alpha.
"Let's go," Ranulf said, stepping out of the room without leaving a single thing for Jaden to carry.
Jaden followed Ranulf as they checked out of the inn. Jaden moved by default while they saddled their horse and prepared to leave. They got on a horse, as Ranulf wouldn't allow Jaden to ride on his own. They departed, leaving Ashkar behind, and began a journey destined for tragedy. Jaden found it immensely frustrating, as he was forced to relive his sorrowful memories. Every detail was a fresh wound. This living, breathing Ranulf was a beautiful, agonizing torture. The journey was silent.