My alarm blares like a shrill reminder of my looming responsibilities. I shut it off with a harsh swipe, my hand missing somewhere between the alarm and the clock. The smell of fresh coffee and dust hangs in the air, greeting me to another day I'd rather spend dozing in bed.
That's when Aunt Libel shows up—my guardian and unofficial advisor.
"How's my Magister? Rough wake-up today again?" she says, a teasing smile on her lips.
Let's be clear: there's no romantic tension here. Although the thought is tempting, especially with those two massive, wobbly things swinging in front of my eyes all day, I have a code of honor. Plus, she used to work with my father. In her eyes, I'm like a nephew or something. So, no chance there.
(Back to the story.)
"More ready than ever," I answer with feigned enthusiasm, stretching. Damn, I'm still sleepy…
Aunt Libel rolls her eyes. "I don't know what your father was thinking choosing you, but alright, we'll manage."
I don't know either.
The rest of the day passes in a series of boring meetings and important decisions that I leave to others. After a long day, I collapse onto my couch. That's when I remember I'm supposed to do something today. What was it again? Never mind. Aunt Libel will handle it.
The door opens.
Yes, people just walk into my apartment without knocking. Respect is dead.
A woman enters. Not just anyone—Kathleen, a representative from the Association tied to my guild. The Association is the name given to a group of bigwigs who run the magical world of this country. Kathleen's job is to deliver the Association's instructions and update us on new directives.
There's something in her gaze that tells me this isn't a courtesy visit. Then again, she's never here for courtesy.
"Hello, Magister Roskales."
Unlike Aunt Libel, she and I are the same age. You'd probably tell me to try to get with her, right? My answer: no chance. Not my fault—I've tried countless times, only to end up rejected. Even a lazy man like me eventually learns. She's a minefield. One of my last wishes in life is to see someone manage to win her over while I'm still alive. That person would become my life mentor.
"Hey, Kathleen. Great to see you too. I missed you so much."
She sighs, completely ignoring my sarcastic attempt. "The former Magister of this guild thought you had what it takes to replace him, but so far, I see more laziness than Magistership."
"Ouch. Thanks for the vote of confidence, Kathleen. You know I'm just here for decoration, right?"
She steps closer, eyes locked on me. "That's what you think. Anyway, there's an urgent matter I need to discuss."
As I said, never a courtesy visit.
I sit up straighter on the couch. "Who says I'm not busy, Kathleen?"
It's true. As guild master, I have tasks every day. I'm a busy man, aren't I?
Ignoring me, Kathleen fixes me with a cold, lethal stare. Wait, she wouldn't dare, would she?
Coffee. That's the solution to all problems—at least, that's what I tell myself as I can't bear her killer gaze any longer.
"Okay, I've got some time. But first, coffee, alright?"
Kathleen studies me a moment longer before finally sitting across from me.
"What'll you have?" I ask, getting up to head to the kitchen. "A double almond-leaf coffee or maybe an aphrodisiac espresso?"
Kathleen raises an eyebrow but replies, "Just black coffee, please."
I head to the kitchen to brew the drinks, letting the aroma fill the air before conversation begins. I opt for a sweet, mild coffee for myself—after all, if we're discussing problems, might as well do it with a decent caffeine boost.
I return with two steaming cups. Once served, I take a sip, hoping it will work wonders for my motivation.
"Alright, Kathleen," I start, setting down my cup. "Explain what's going on. Why are you here, besides reminding me that I'm unfit to be guild master?"
She sighs, as if anticipating my reaction. "Recently, a raider who disappeared in the past has resurfaced. Rumors say she's planning something. Since she's operating in your region, the Association has tasked your guild with uncovering her plans. Stopping her would, of course, be ideal."
I take another sip. "So?"
How does that concern me?
I sigh. "Listen, Kathleen, I'm master in name only, not in fact. I can't do anything. Do as usual. Talk to Aunt Libel; she'll know what to do."
My words seem to irritate her slightly, but it's the truth. If my guild is supposed to stop a criminal, what could I possibly do?
To promote liberal leadership (aka dump responsibilities), I've left the guild's administrative affairs to Aunt Libel. So being consulted for a matter like this isn't really my place. My duties are mostly stamping the guild seal and attending monthly guild meetings.
Kathleen knows this. So why bother me?
"Oh, really?" she says, smirking.
Strange.
"Seems you don't quite grasp the situation you're in, Magister Roskales," she continues.
What does she mean?
I start to feel intrigued, and Kathleen notices—her small smile betrays her amusement.
She continues. "Know this: you are a Warden, which means you're a mage under contract with the state."
Kathleen leans back elegantly in her chair, crossing her legs with the cold poise of an ex you'd rather never have, a small satisfied smile on her face.
I frown. I may be a professional lazybones, but I know a thing or two about magical bureaucracy.
"So?" I say, setting my cup down, as if having my hands free might help me escape the discussion. "I'm also Magister of this guild, which makes me a leader. Leader. The word matters, right?"
Kathleen shakes her head, clearly amused. She hands me an envelope sealed with the golden mark of the Association. I open it reluctantly, reading the two lines inside, feeling my stomach drop.
> The apathetic behavior and passive management of Magister Roskales have raised doubts about his legitimacy. A practical evaluation will be conducted for the present mission. In the event of blatant failure or direct abdication, his appointment will be suspended, and his status re-evaluated.
I reread it. Again. And again. The words remain the same.
Kathleen crosses her arms, impassive.
"The Association thinks you are too…" She pauses, searching for the right word, but her mocking gaze says she knows exactly what to say. "…lax. That's the word used in the report."
I rub my forehead. "Lax?"
She shrugs. "Lax."
Charming.
"So this mission isn't just a mission." I point to the scroll like it's a cursed blade. "It's a test."
She nods, smiling. "An evaluation."
I sigh deeply, slumping in my chair, arms dangling. I knew this day was doomed. From the moment I smelled dust mixed with coffee, it was over.
"If you are removed, you'll have to perform daily missions for this guild as a regular member. And if you think your lazy life would be better as a simple Warden, you're gravely mistaken, Magister Roskales."
I'm about to sip my coffee, but I stop cold.
Is what she's saying true?
My original secret plan was to boycott my leadership role, forcing the guild or Association to recognize my incompetence and remove me. I thought once the burden of guild master was gone, I could return to my lazy life.
But there's a clause in the Warden contract about membership and confidentiality.
Damn! That'll teach me to sign anything just to have peace. So it's ruined? Am I doomed to a life of forced labor? Father, is this the destiny you left your son to?
"Damn it, what am I supposed to do then?"
My words echo through my thoughts.
Kathleen… smiles? I knew she was a devil hiding in beauty's skin! I wouldn't be surprised if she was the one who complained to the Association.
"Simple. Complete this mission properly. It will extend your probation as guild master," she replies.
No other options? Couldn't I just run away? No, for a lazy man like me, that would be the worst choice. A life of laziness without freedom? Nightmare.
"Alright, alright," I finally say.
Can't help it. All my father's fault. I swear I'll find a way to resurrect you!
"Give me the details of this matter. It's urgent, right? Better deal with it quickly."
Nothing will stop me from preserving my lazy life!