The Nexus Mall Grand Prix had come to a grinding, nonsensical halt. Why? Because Bugs Bunny had literally painted a tunnel onto a solid brick wall, and Thanos—in his tiny purple tricycle—had actually tried to ride through it.
CRUNCH.
"I... I am... inevitable..." Thanos groaned, his head stuck in the brickwork while his legs dangled helplessly.
"You're 'in-a-terrible' spot, doc!" Bugs Bunny quipped, pulling a giant wooden mallet from behind his back. "Want me to help you out? It only costs one Infinity Stone. Or a really nice carrot."
Deadpool's Marketing Minute
"Don't do it, Thanos!" Deadpool yelled, appearing in the shot holding a tray of 'Deadpool-Brand' nachos. "He's a toon! He doesn't play by the rules of physics! He's got 'Contractual Immunity'! Also, Soum (Ahhhh dumbass why you always talk my name let me focus in writing), look at this! We finally got a title! Saitama and the Multiverse of Madness! Catchy, right? It only cost me three lawsuits and a kidney!"
Deadpool turned to Saitama, who was currently trying to use the Legendary Golden Cabbage as a pillow.
"Hey, Cueball! Wake up! We've got guests!"
The Marvel-ous Mashup
The ceiling didn't just break this time; it dissolved into pixels. Doctor Strange floated down, looking extremely tired. Behind him was Iron Man, who was currently arguing with Genos about whose jet propulsion system was more efficient.
"I'm telling you, kid, the gold-titanium alloy is the way to go," Tony Stark said, flipping up his faceplate.
"Incinerate," Genos replied robotically, his arms glowing.
"Stephen! Do something!" Spider-Man (Tom Holland version) shouted, webbing up a shelf of falling 'Hello Kitty' plushies. "There's a giant green ogre fighting a purple alien, and a yellow sponge is trying to give me a Krabby Patty! This isn't the Mirror Dimension, this is a Denny's parking lot at 3 AM!"
"I can't fix this," Strange sighed, rubbing his temples. "The timeline is being held together by a bald man's grocery list and a rabbit's sense of humor."
The ACME War Begins
"Oh, you want a fight?" Bugs Bunny asked, his eyes sparkling with mischief. "Hey, Saitama! Catch!"
Bugs tossed a small, black hole—a literal ACME Portable Hole—at Saitama.
Saitama caught it. "What is this? A coaster?" He placed it on the floor.
Immediately, The Hulk fell out of the hole, followed by Wolverine, who was currently mid-shout.
"WHERE IS MAGNETO?!" Logan growled, snapping his claws.
"Wrong franchise, bub!" Deadpool chirped. "But hey, while you're here, can you help Shrek? He's trying to explain 'Layers' to Frieza, and I think the lizard is about to blow up the food court."
The Talent Show of Terror
"ENOUGH!" Lord Beerus (Dragon Ball Super) descended from the heavens, his purple fur crackling with Hakai energy. Next to him sat Simon Cowell, sitting at a judge's desk that was floating on a cloud.
"This chaos is boring me," Beerus yawned. "I was promised a spectacle. If I am not entertained in the next five minutes, I will erase this entire mall, the cabbage, and the man with the red suit who won't stop talking."
"You heard the cat!" Simon Cowell barked. "I want to see talent! Or at least something less embarrassing than that tricycle incident. Thanos, you're up first. What can you do?"
Thanos, still stuck in the wall, let out a muffled roar. "I... CAN... BALANCE... THE... UNIVERSE..."
"X," Simon pressed his red buzzer. "Next!"
Gojo Satoru stepped forward, sliding his blindfold up. "I can make everyone in this room feel like they're inside an infinite void of their own thoughts where time and space cease to exist!"
"Sounds like a Tuesday in London," Simon deadpanned. "X. Next!"
The Wildcard
Deadpool grabbed SpongeBob and Saitama. "Alright, boys! We're a boy band now! We're called 'The Bald, The Bold, and The Absorbent'! Hit it, Brook!"
Brook (One Piece) started shredding a heavy metal version of 'Sweet Victory'.
SpongeBob grabbed a microphone. Saitama just stood there, holding his cabbage. Deadpool started doing a TikTok dance that was already three years out of date.
"I'M READY!" SpongeBob screamed, hitting a high note that shattered the Infinity Gauntlet's grip on reality.
"Hey reader, I am Your daddy deadpool what do you is gonna happen next. I told that bloody diot Soum to make me the protaginist and give me so much power that I can kiss some ass but he made me a laughing stock that mother fu- I AM SO SORRY GUYS FOR DEADPOOLS behavior I promise he will not use any slang in this story it's pure my your hearts thanks continue reading."