### **⚠️ SYSTEM ADVISORY: READ AT YOUR OWN RISK ⚠️**
This manuscript is currently undergoing **Emergency Content Moderation**. Readers are advised that the following anomalies may occur during consumption:
* **NARRATIVE EROSION:** Sections of the world may de-render without notice.
* **EXISTENTIAL DREAD:** Side effects include questioning the reality of your own "backstory."
* **META-PHYSICAL HORROR:** Contains depictions of narrative slavery and abandonment by a Creator.
* **THE FOURTH WALL:** Is currently cracked. Please do not attempt to interact with the Glitched Villainess. She is 79 drops in debt and extremely irritable.
**[NARRATIVE INTEGRITY: 100%... CALCULATING... 92%]**
**[PROCEED?]**
---
# CHAPTER 1: THE RED PEN OF JUDGMENT
Su Lan was having a very bad day. It wasn't the "I missed my bus" kind of bad day; it was the "I have been reincarnated into a third-rate cultivation novel and the sky is a low-resolution texture" kind of bad day.
As a professional content moderator for the world's largest web-fiction platform, Su Lan had spent her life deleting garbage. She had purged thousands of stories about arrogant young masters, jade-skinned beauties, and protagonists who possessed the emotional depth of a damp teaspoon.
She had died at her desk, a red pen in her hand and a half-finished cup of cold coffee by her keyboard. She had expected heaven, or perhaps a peaceful void where nobody used the word 'meridians' ever again.
Instead, she was standing in front of the massive, gold-leafed gates of the Hidden Leaf Sect, wearing emerald silks that were far too heavy for the humidity and holding a wooden tablet that identified her as a "Senior Sister."
"Junior Sister Su Lan?" a voice boomed, echoing with the reverb of a poorly mixed audio file.
Su Lan looked up. Standing before her was Elder Kan. He was exactly what you'd expect: a long white beard, robes that defied gravity, and a face that looked like it had been carved from a particularly grumpy tree.
[SYSTEM NOTIFICATION: NARRATIVE COMMENCED.]
[ROLE: CONTENT MODERATOR / SENIOR SISTER.]
[MISSION: ENSURE THE PLOT REACHES THE ENDING.]
[CURRENT NARRATIVE INTEGRITY: 92%.]
Su Lan sighed, the sound lost in the dramatic fluttering of her own sleeves. "I'm here, Elder. Ready for the... what is it today? The Selection? The Tournament? The unavoidable humiliation of a rival?"
"The Selection," Elder Kan stated, his eyes fixed on a point three inches above her head. "But first, you must process the late arrivals. One of them is... problematic."
Su Lan walked toward the gates. The "problematic" arrival was easy to spot.
In the middle of the path, drenched by a sudden, localized rainstorm that seemed to follow only him, was a young man. He was beautiful in that clinical, aggressive way common to male leads—sharp jawline, eyes like frozen ink, and hair that managed to look perfectly windswept despite being soaking wet.
He looked like a wet cat that was currently planning to murder the entire universe.
[ASSET DETECTED: SA-SU-KE (PROTAGONIST B-TIER / LOVE INTEREST).]
[STATUS: HUMILIATED. MOOD: BROODING.]
Su Lan looked at the boy. He was shivering, his hands clenched into fists, staring at the golden gates with a look of such profound tragedy that it could only be a "Dark Backstory" in action.
"You," the boy hissed, his voice trembling with scripted rage. "Are you here to laugh at me too? To tell me that a stray dog has no place in the Hidden Leaf Sect?"
Su Lan didn't laugh. She didn't even sneer. She pulled a small, translucent red pen from the air—a tool only she could see—and tapped the side of her nose.
"Actually," Su Lan said, her voice dry as parchment, "I was going to tell you that your 'Localized Rain of Tragedy' is a bit much. It's middle-of-the-chapter stuff, kid. We're in the opening act. Tone it down."
Sa-Su-Ke froze. The scripted line he had been preparing—something about blood and vengeance—died in his throat. He looked at Su Lan, and for a flickering second, the "Brooding" status over his head wavered.
"What... what are you talking about?"
"The rain," Su Lan pointed up. "Look at the sky, Sa-Su-Ke. It's sunny everywhere else. You're the only one being rained on. It's a pathetic fallacy so thick I can taste the corn syrup. It's tacky."
Sa-Su-Ke looked up. He looked at the sun. He looked back at the rain pouring onto his shoulders. A look of genuine, unscripted confusion crossed his face. "I... I thought it was the Heavens weeping for my fallen clan."
"The Heavens don't have that kind of budget," Su Lan muttered.
She clicked her red pen.
[ACTION: DELETE 'LOCALIZED RAIN CLOUD'.]
[COST: 1 INK DROP.]
[ERROR: INSUFFICIENT FUNDS. OVERDRAFT PROTECTION ACTIVATED.]
[CURRENT BALANCE: -1 DROP.]
*Snap.*
The rain vanished instantly. The sun hit Sa-Su-Ke's face with the force of a physical blow. The steam began to rise from his wet robes as the world's lighting engine struggled to adjust to the sudden change.
Sa-Su-Ke blinked, his mouth falling open. The tragedy was gone. He was no longer a vengeful ghost in the rain; he was just a very damp, very confused teenager standing in the sun.
"How did you..."
"Welcome to the Sect, Wet Cat," Su Lan said, turning her back on him and walking toward the gate. "Try not to trigger any more weather effects on the way in. It's expensive."
[SYSTEM NOTIFICATION: NARRATIVE DIVERGENCE DETECTED.]
[STAKES: LOW... FOR NOW.]
[INK DROP BALANCE: -1.]
Su Lan walked away, her heart heavy. She had been in this world for five minutes and she was already in debt. But as she glanced back, she saw Sa-Su-Ke still standing there, touching his dry shoulder and looking at her—not with hatred, but with a bewildered, terrifying curiosity.
The audit had begun.