Urian had a simple life. Wake up, herd goats, punch rocks to build "muscles," and occasionally trip over his own feet. Life in the tiny mountain village of Slaprock was peaceful… almost too peaceful.
"Ugh, why do rocks have to be so… solid?" Urian groaned, hitting a boulder with a punch. Nothing happened. He hit it again. Nothing. On the third punch… KABOOM! The boulder shattered into tiny pieces.
Urian blinked. "Huh. Okay, that was… new."
From behind the trees, a strange green figure appeared, hovering in midair with a dramatic pose that would have made any anime fan jealous.
"Finally! A warrior worthy of the universe's attention!" the Namekian cried, spinning once for flair. "You… you have immense power!"
Urian squinted. "Wait… what? Do you mean I'm strong, or you just like my hair?"
The Namekian groaned. "Your hair? No! Your energy! Your Ki! The universe depends on your—"
Urian interrupted, pointing at a nearby goat. "Uh… can I still keep my goats?"
"Your… goats?" The Namekian looked genuinely horrified. "You must train, boy! There's no time—"
"Hold up," Urian said, scratching his head. "First, snacks. Do you have snacks? Because I can't fight on an empty stomach. Also, can you teach the goats to fight too? They've been slacking."
The Namekian facepalmed so hard it almost echoed through the mountains. "You… you're hopeless. But fine. We start training. Now!"
Training with Urian was… chaotic. On the first day, he accidentally punched a tree so hard it exploded, sending leaves and branches into orbit. On the second day, he tried to dodge an energy blast and ended up flying into a lava pit. And on the third day… he discovered he could fly by flailing his arms wildly while screaming, "I AM FREE!"
By sunset, Urian was covered in soot, scorched rocks, and goat hair. He coughed. "So… this is training?"
"Yes! And you're a natural!" the Namekian exclaimed. "If you keep this up, you could become a legendary warrior—maybe even stronger than Goku!"
"Goku?" Urian tilted his head. "Is that the guy who likes to eat a lot and punch stuff?"
"Yes… how did you know?"
Urian shrugged. "Just a hunch. Anyway, does this legendary warrior get tacos too?"
The Namekian groaned again. "I give up…"
Suddenly, a distant rumble shook the mountains. Urian's eyes lit up. "Oooh… adventure?"
And somewhere far above, in the empty void of space, someone was watching—a broccoli-headed alien with a ridiculously evil laugh.
"Excellent… another boy to terrorize!"
Urian looked at his goats. "Well… maybe this adventure will be fun. But first… snack break."
To be continued…