One step. All it took was one step. His hand outstretched, his desperate, clear blue eyes begging me to take that one step. Those honest eyes lingered for a few short seconds before they left, leaving me alone in the bathroom staring at my pathetic reflection.
Shoulders drooped, hair uncombed, eyebags hanging like the thread of hope he had for us. Those clear blue eyes were always honest and true, and that's why I loved them. That's why I loved him. But I couldn't do it. I couldn't leave behind the world I knew, the world I'd come to love, for his. To leave for him would mean I was his, and his alone, to live in that world meant there was no way for me to be my own person.. and that is a luxury I wasn't ready to give up.
"Carlene. This will only hurt you. A curse that will only kill you. Did you understand that, dear? You have been sentenced to a wretched life." At twelve years old, there's only so much you understand until you live the words that are burned into you. I woke up in the middle of a still winter night, when the sky was pitch black and it seemed like everything in the world had been switched off. Except me. Unusually, my eyes didn't grow tired as soon as the nanny turned the lights off, and my mind didn't drift off into some dreamland. I was awake, like an owl, eyes wide open, mind so alive and so empty. There were no thoughts; there was a stillness to match the night, and a thirst. I rolled out of the bed that was too big for me, turned on the lights and stumbled towards the counter where a glass of water sat - and so I sat and I drank. And then I saw.
Nothing could've prepared twelve year old me for what was in front. The mirror was no mirror. Instead of a reflection of the bedroom, I saw the ocean. Waves as tall as mountains, reaching high towards the stars and then grandly crashing down again, triggering more waves behind them to repeat. I had never seen the ocean before, such vastness, such greatness, such beauty - I was entranced. I was being sucked into this world... it felt so real, when I closed my eyes for a second it felt like I could taste the saltwater... until I could.
As my eyes opened, so did my mouth, I was left stunned. There I was - standing on soft sand, gazing out at a night sky sprinkled with twinkling stars that reflected on the ocean water like a million little fireflies. Each wave was like a blanket trying to embrace itself - constantly trying, constantly failing. My thirst was cured, my head was washed over with thoughts and questions, and my little heart, for the first time in a while, was beating with excitement. Although I didn't know it at the time, that was the curse's first stitch. That was the beginning.