Chapter 6 — Slutty Pumpkin (Masks, Debts & Foreshadowing)
Ted Mosby believed in destiny dressed in costumes.
Barney Stinson believed in costumes that barely counted as costumes.
And Ivar Scherbatsky? He believed Halloween was an excuse to wear a sword in public without getting arrested.
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MacLaren's — The Pre-Game
The gang huddled in the booth, drinks in hand, costumes either elaborate or half-hearted.
Marshall: full-on Jack Sparrow, complete with eyeliner.
Lily: a parrot, because "team costumes."
Barney: a fighter pilot, insisting it was Top Gun when everyone else knew it was just an excuse to wear aviators indoors.
Ted: a hanging chad, because of course.
Robin: her work blazer, because she'd just come off air.
And Ivar?
A sleek black suit, half-mask, and a blade strapped to his hip.
"You're a fencing instructor?" Ted guessed.
"No," Ivar said. "I'm Canadian Batman. The billionaire with no time for branding."
Barney pointed dramatically. "I KNEW IT."
Robin rolled her eyes. "This is why I don't bring him to parties."
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The Party
Ted stationed himself by the punch bowl like a lighthouse waiting for a very specific ship: the Slutty Pumpkin, the girl he'd met years ago.
Barney prowled the crowd, tossing out catchphrases like candy corn. "Trick or treat… emphasis on trick."
Meanwhile, Ivar drifted through with his usual predator's calm, chatting, smiling, occasionally terrifying people when they realized the sword was real.
Lily eventually cornered him in the kitchen.
"Okay, billionaire boy. Confession: my credit card bill went down this month. By half. Mysteriously. That wasn't you, was it?"
Ivar poured her more wine. "Must've been a Halloween miracle."
Lily narrowed her eyes. "If I find out you secretly paid my debts, I'm going to… hug you so hard you regret it."
"Duly noted," Ivar said.
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Robin & the Foreshadow
Later, Robin arrived in costume — nothing too flashy, but enough to make Ted choke on his beer. She laughed, leaning against the wall near Ivar.
"You know," Ivar said casually, "you're wasting your time at Metro. You should be working for me."
Robin rolled her eyes. "I'm not becoming the Scherbatsky family pet project."
"Not a pet," Ivar said. "An anchor. When you're ready, I'll have the desk waiting."
She smirked. "You're impossible."
"And you're underpaid."
For a second, the music drowned out the banter, and Ted—hovering close enough to overhear—felt his stomach twist. Robin wasn't just someone's crush. She was someone's sister. And that someone had a billion-dollar empire behind him.
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The Slutty Pumpkin
Ted waited all night, nursing his drink, checking the door every five minutes.
She never came.
Marshall and Lily went home early, laughing arm-in-arm. Barney vanished with a vampire and a nurse. Robin left for another late-night news hit.
And Ivar? He strolled out with Melissa on his arm, mask tucked into his pocket, sword slung casual.
"You really believe in her, huh?" he asked Ted on the way out.
"I do," Ted said.
Ivar tilted his head. "Belief is good. Just don't confuse waiting with living."
Ted sighed. "You always have to sound like you're narrating a survival guide, don't you?"
"Somebody has to," Ivar said, and disappeared into the New York night like a man who didn't need costumes to be a legend.