The morning sun spilled over a small abandoned training yard. Rusted targets, wooden dummies, and scattered barrels hinted at previous exercises. Adam leaned against a wall, coffee in hand, coat flaring dramatically.
Environment: controlled danger. Targets: semi-serious combat. Opportunity: maximal chaos.
"Today," Adam announced, voice booming, "you shall learn combat transmutation! Optional: catastrophe. Correct: spectacle. Mandatory: flair."
Edward groaned. "Flair again? I swear… I don't know how anyone survives this."
Adam tilted his head. "Optional doubt. Correct: engagement. Step one: targets. Step two: materials. Step three: dramatic improvisation."
Alphonse's armored hand hovered over a barrel. "So… this is like… battle practice?"
Adam nodded. "Correct. Optional caution. Mandatory fun. Coffee… recommended."
---
Adam clapped his hands, drawing a massive transmutation circle in the dirt. It glowed faintly with residual energy, stars and spirals swirling in dramatic arcs. Edward raised an eyebrow.
"This… isn't going to blow up, right?" he asked nervously.
Adam smirked. "Optional explosions. Correct: control. Focus, flair, coffee… begin!"
---
Edward picked up a plank while Alphonse steadied a barrel. Adam waved both hands, signaling the start. Sparks flew, wood spun, and the barrel levitated. The brothers flinched as one plank went flying toward a wooden dummy—but Adam swooped in mid-air, catching it with one hand while spinning, coffee in the other.
Edward blinked. "He… just caught it mid-flight?!"
Adam nodded calmly. "Correct. Optional panic. Mandatory improvisation."
Alphonse chuckled. "I… think I'm ready to try this."
Adam waved a dramatic finger. "Correct. Optional hesitation. Mandatory confidence."
---
The brothers attempted their first transmutation attack. Edward slammed his plank into a dummy, sending it spinning into a stack of barrels. Alphonse's barrel floated, twisting and turning in perfect orbit around Edward. Sparks flew.
Adam clapped. "Optional mistakes! Correct learning! Chaos integration! Step two: adapt with flair!"
Edward groaned, frustrated but laughing. "I can't believe this… but it's kind of working."
Alphonse's armor clanged as he spun the barrel into a precise strike. Adam flipped over a barrel, landing between the brothers, coffee still intact. Performance: mandatory. Chaos: optimal.
---
Suddenly, Adam pulled out a "surprise" target: a wooden dummy dressed in tattered cloth and sporting a painted-on angry face. "Optional: seriousness. Correct: fun. Now… combat flair!"
Edward and Alphonse exchanged glances. "Combat flair… what?"
Adam somersaulted, kicking a plank into the dummy's head. It toppled dramatically, and sparks flew from a nearby metal barrel Adam had kicked into place.
Edward muttered, "I… can't believe that just happened."
Alphonse laughed. "It… actually looks effective!"
Adam sipped his coffee. "Correct. Optional disbelief. Mandatory spectacle."
---
The lesson escalated. Adam instructed them to combine planks, barrels, and stones into coordinated attacks. Edward and Alphonse hesitated, unsure of timing.
Adam leapt onto a barrel, twirled, and pointed dramatically. "Optional hesitation is your enemy! Correct: action! Execute with style!"
Edward gritted his teeth and threw a plank, which Alphonse transmuted midair into a spinning disk. Adam vaulted, landing gracefully on the dummy, sending it crashing into the other targets.
Ellie would have laughed. Joel would have muttered in disbelief. But Adam? Calm, composed, coffee in hand. Performance: flawless.
---
As the sun climbed higher, the brothers grew more confident. Sparks flew in arcs, barrels hovered midair, and planks struck targets with precision. Each time Edward stumbled, Adam turned it into a dramatic lesson: somersaults, flips, and coffee saves, often coinciding with comic timing that made even Alphonse snicker.
Edward finally grinned. "Okay… this is insane, but I think I'm starting to get it."
Alphonse nodded. "Yeah… chaos… actually helps control the attack."
Adam clapped, spinning once. "Correct! Optional doubt, correct execution! Combat transmutation achieved. Chaos: optimized. Flair: mandatory."
---
After several rounds, Adam had them attempt a final coordinated attack. Sparks flew, barrels spun, and the wooden dummy "enemies" were knocked down in a perfectly orchestrated, if utterly ridiculous, display.
Edward gasped. "We… actually did it!"
Alphonse laughed. "We didn't just do it… we enjoyed it!"
Adam raised his coffee cup like a trophy. "Correct. Optional panic. Mandatory celebration. Combat transmutation: mastered… in style!"
---
By sunset, the yard was littered with flying debris, spinning planks, and levitating barrels. Edward and Alphonse's confidence soared, and even Adam looked pleased.
Adam adjusted his coat dramatically. "Lesson complete. Optional boredom. Correct: success. Mandatory spectacle. Remember: alchemy is not just circles and stones—it's improvisation, flair, and coffee. Combat… optional but fun."
Edward shook his head, smiling despite himself. "I still don't know how we survived… but we did it. And I get it now—chaos works."
Alphonse chuckled. "Yeah… and it's kind of amazing."
Adam tipped his coffee cup. Next stage… inevitable. Chaos… required. Performance… continuing.
The brothers exchanged a glance, unsure if they had just met a genius, a madman, or a combination of both. But under Adam Thompson's guidance, combat transmutation had never been so effective—or so hilarious.