Adam Thompson stood outside a corporate office building, adjusting his coat like it was a suit of armor. Mortals… so obsessed with structure, deadlines, and meaningless meetings. Absolutely perfect for unboring.
A receptionist peeked over her desk. "Can I help you, sir?"
"Yes. I am here to… relieve boredom," Adam said casually.
"Uh… what?"
Exactly. Perfect reaction.
"I seek… a position of chaos. Perhaps… intern? Assistant? Or Supreme Unbored Overseer?"
The receptionist blinked. "Intern… maybe… I guess."
Adam grinned. "Excellent. First step: infiltrate. Second step: escalate. Third step: chaos."
He stepped into the lobby. Humans in suits… so fragile… so predictable… so boring.
A man carried a coffee cup. Adam flicked his fingers. The coffee spiraled into a miniature tornado, lightly drenching the papers in his hands.
"Hey! My report!" the man yelled.
Perfect. Human panic… delightful.
A printer whirred to life on its own. Pages began flying out, folding themselves into origami dragons that flapped around the office. Adam clapped slowly. "Marvelous. Efficiency meets absurdity."
"Sir… what are you—" a clerk began.
Fragile mortal trying to speak… amusing.
"Relieving boredom," Adam said simply. "You should try it sometime."
A pigeon flew in through the open window, carrying a tiny briefcase in its beak. Excellent. Chaos courier.
Adam wandered past the cubicles. Every stapler, paperclip, and sticky note shivered in anticipation. Ah… objects are obedient. Fun potential: high.
He picked up a phone. Dialed an extension. "Yes… activate mild chaos protocol."
Instantly, everyone's chairs sprouted wheels and zoomed around aimlessly. Paper stacks danced in midair like synchronized swimmers. One man screamed as his tie began tap-dancing on his own neck.
"Stop! Stop! What is happening?!" the office manager yelled.
Exactly. The reaction is exquisite.
Adam leaned on a desk. "Ah… yes. Boredom… creeping back. Let's intensify."
He pointed at the water cooler. The water erupted into a miniature fountain of rainbow-colored liquid. Employees screamed, papers soaked, printers squirted rainbow jets.
"This… is insanity!" someone shouted.
Insanity… delightful.
A child's toy robot, smuggled in by an intern, suddenly began breakdancing on the CEO's desk. Adam grinned. Level of amusement: adequate.
From the corner, the receptionist whispered, "Sir… what… what are you doing?"
Adam shrugged. "Work… of a bored god. Minor chaos… essential. Fun… mandatory."
He grabbed a stapler. It grew tiny arms, jumped onto a filing cabinet, and started juggling envelopes. Yes. Office supplies… perfect entertainment.
A man tried to type on his computer. The keyboard sprouted legs and danced away. Exactly.
Adam strolled to the conference room. The projector turned into a tiny holographic dragon. Flipcharts spun like pinwheels. Coffee mugs launched into the air, performing synchronized acrobatics.
"Sir… someone call security!" the manager shrieked.
Yes… call them. Let us see how fragile mortals react to chaos unleashed by boredom.
Adam sipped a glowing coffee he had conjured from thin air. The office… transformed. Humans… terrified. Objects… obedient to chaos. And I… am still very, very bored.
He glanced at a clock. Time… irrelevant. Boredom… eternal.
A pigeon landed on his shoulder. Yes… witnesses. Audience… essential.
He flicked his wrist. Chairs began doing waltz patterns. Sticky notes formed a miniature marching band. Even the elevator doors clapped rhythmically.
Perfection. Mortals are fragile. Chaos is delicious. Entertainment… abundant. And I… am still bored.
Adam leaned back, eyes gleaming. "Office world… prepare yourself. Every cubicle, every stapler, every terrified employee… will be exploited to unbore me."
A photocopier sprouted tiny wings and flew toward the ceiling. Yes. Yes. This… is exactly what I need.
A scream echoed down the hall. "My files! My life!"
Exactly. Perfect. Absolute delight.
Adam sipped another glowing coffee. The mortal world… absurd. Humans… entertaining in their terror. Chaos… bountiful. And I… am still, hilariously, very, very bored.