Time galloped on again, and I didn't notice another year pass. I am now two years and… almost nine months old. The days flew by just as quickly, but also more monotonously, a monotony that was slowly starting to get me down.
Right now, I was sitting in my room waiting for Hiruzen. He had visited several times during this period; we would talk a little, and that was it. The amusing old man, to my regret, had quickly developed an immunity to my behavior. Making him freeze up from absurdity was becoming increasingly difficult. Now, according to him, he was supposed to tell me something important.
Over the past year, I had made some progress in controlling my energies, but not much more. The training process was becoming more and more monotonous and, it seemed to me, too limited. With each passing day, an unpleasant feeling of falling behind grew stronger.
From the moment I was born, I had been secretive when using my energies. I didn't know why myself; I just intuitively felt that doing otherwise was dangerous. It seemed to me that it would be extremely strange if someone found a baby practicing techniques. My imagination would then paint pictures of me being taken to dark basements. After which, some "mind-probers" with blond hair would place numerous seals on me to ensure my loyalty to the Leaf's leadership. In Konoha, as I recall, there is the Yamanaka clan, specializing in mental techniques. I also remembered many fanfics about them, where the Yamanaka were portrayed as the attack dogs of "evil" councilors and the Hokage, brainwashing absolutely all of Konoha's residents into loyalty.
Back then, right after my birth, my head was a jumble of many different images of this world. And it was unclear which of them was true.
Of course, I had no memory of any such experience of being in basements. There were only paranoid thoughts that if I showed myself to be different in any way, I would end up there. But now, all these assumptions were collapsing like a house of cards. The local caretakers did, of course, read fairy tales about various heroes who sacrificed their lives for their country/village or something else. But that, in my opinion, was within the framework of building the morality of any country's citizens, not aggressive propaganda. No one ever told us directly: "You must die for the Leaf!" Also, we—that is, the small children—were not treated badly. They weren't training fighters from birth. In a way, instilling any principles is propaganda. But in relation to my age group, it's called upbringing. It helps one live in society.
And this was not the picture that the fanfics I'd read had led me to expect… Hiruzen himself didn't seem like a bad character to me at all. Rather, given his reactions to my proposals for all sorts of machinations, he was almost a saint. Well, or an extremely good actor, which I doubt.
So, what I'm getting at is that I probably don't need to be so secretive anymore. Or rather, considering my slowed progress, it's almost a necessity. The Akatsuki… every day brings me closer to meeting them. And as long as I'm not strong enough to stand against them, a small seed of anxiety lingers in the background.
What's much worse… I've seen Boruto. Or rather, I know about the threat of the Ōtsutsuki clan. Aliens who could turn out to be stronger than the strongest shinobi in history. Thoughts of them even keep me up at night sometimes. But to resolve all this…
Let's say I reveal some of my chakra control abilities to Hiruzen. According to him, I'm already old enough for some kind of important conversation, which means they're unlikely to find anything unusual about my level of knowledge. And, since Hiruzen is my guardian, after my demonstration, perhaps he, guided by the principle of not letting talent go to waste, will arrange for me to have teachers, most likely provide a place like a training ground, and I assume I'll be able to develop properly, many times faster than now. Therefore, I think this upcoming conversation will be a good opportunity to lead up to that.
Hiruzen and I were walking through the streets of Konoha. This was the first time I had left the hospital-daycare.
The village's main landmark was the huge cliff with the four Hokage heads carved into it. Although, as I know from the books I've read, that's certainly not the only thing here. The village, as I know, is quite large. The population definitely exceeds one hundred thousand, if you count the civilians. Most people here seem to prefer wearing dark-colored tops—black, blue, and the like—and usually green-hued bottoms. Well, at least that applies to the shinobi—the people who wear a metal plate with the village symbol. Also, many here have a habit of wrapping their lower legs in bandages, which seems strange and inconvenient to me. My pants have an elastic band at the bottom, so I don't need to wrap that fabric every time.
My own attire didn't particularly stand out—a simple and comfortable black jumpsuit.
We were walking down a medium-width street where ten people could easily pass each other. The buildings here were quite dense. Numerous structures, some quite low, others rising more than ten stories above the streets. Sometimes, bridges connecting buildings were visible directly above us. There were often huge signs with kanji or pictures, enticing visitors. The buildings often looked unrefined, archaic, as if they were built by architects from different schools who, in those same educational institutions, clearly didn't get more than a "satisfactory." Because looking at the roofs of some houses or their plumbing makes you want to let out a few profanities.
On the other hand, perhaps I'm being too critical. This world followed a different path of development. The technology here is similar, but different. The streets are quite clean, they don't stink. And that's a very big plus.
"Impressive?" the Hokage asked as we walked, watching out of the corner of his eye as I turned my head all around.
"Not quite what I was expecting to see," I answered honestly, continuing to walk. "I've seen some of the landmarks in textbooks. They looked more organic… But here. This style of architecture isn't very popular with us, is it?"
Over time and with much practice, my speech had lost its childish errors. Just as, after a long time of communicating with Hiruzen, I had stopped being nervous and had become more open with him.
"The people who built this often had no education. Many buildings are still standing only because they were reinforced with shinobi techniques…" the old man explained in a relaxed manner, beginning to look around with a certain nostalgia. "This place reminds me of my childhood. I remember, every year I walked through here, it changed. It was only twenty years ago that they stopped putting up new buildings here."
"Interesting…"
We continued on our way somewhere. Having finished inspecting the buildings, my gaze was caught by the fact that many passersby glanced at Hiruzen and me and often bowed to him, as well as made way for us. He's a respected old man.
What was strange, I didn't feel any "hateful" gazes on me. Only a few people's eyes widened when they looked specifically at me, but almost immediately, upon noticing the Hokage, they would either try to give a nod of their head again or simply turn away.
"One of the good spots. Naruto, want me to treat you to some ramen?" we suddenly stopped near what looked like a café, with an open-air seating area for customers. Something like a garage, only instead of a garage door, there were cloth banners with the inscription "Ramen" and a visible counter with stools.
"I've never tried it. I'd be grateful."
We entered and were greeted by a man with a slightly thin face, wearing a low white cap and an apron. This was the cook, who respectfully greeted Hiruzen and asked what we would be ordering.
They helped me onto a stool, after which I chose a standard ramen with beef. This was the very same ramen shop where the original Naruto often ate. I recognized the place by the cook—Teuchi. In a way, it was a legendary place, and I didn't want to spoil my first impression with something unusual. The Hokage, on the other hand, ordered ramen with some kind of seaweed and sardine fish balls. To my palate, sophisticated by European dishes in my past life, his food must taste strange. But to each their own.
"What I want to tell you is very important, Naruto."
I noisily slurped some noodles into my mouth, then nodded seriously.
"Ahem… Nindo. Have they told you about it?"
Gulp
"Yep, the ninja way."
"It is a ninja's way of life, their motto, beliefs, or… dream," he began, listing them off. "A nindo can be anything. Even something not accepted by society. All shinobi have their own nindo."
"M-hm…"
"It doesn't have to be something strict. Often, shinobi follow two or more nindo. Also, different shinobi can follow the same nindo. Right now, I want to tell you about the nindo that almost all of Konoha's shinobi follow. The Will of Fire."
"Oh, I've heard of it," I nod. "We must choose what we will fight for. Set a goal for ourselves to strive towards."
"That's correct, but incomplete," smiling at my knowledge, Hiruzen continued, "It is the Will of Fire that gives the Leaf shinobi the strength to fight, regardless of the circumstances. It strengthens their willpower, their character. But it is also a symbol that the dreams and hopes of previous generations are passed on to the next. Thus, the Will of Fire lives on through the ages."
"The caretakers said that it dates back to when ninja first appeared. Is that true?" I recalled again what I had heard in the hospital. I don't remember such details from the anime, but I was curious.
"It is not known for certain, actually. As for the Will of Fire… You were right about the goal," the old man confirmed with another smile, then continued with growing inspiration, "But it would be more complete to say that it can be anything. You can choose a person or people you want to protect. For example, I protect the civilians who cannot stand up for themselves. That is my 'king' in shogi. That is my Will of Fire."
There was an analogue of chess here—shogi. In this game, there was also an analogue of the king, who also needed to be protected, otherwise the game would be over.
After finishing his speech, he looked at me expectantly, waiting for something.
"Um… wow?" I wasn't particularly moved.
Hiruzen's shoulders slumped.
"The First Hokage once told me this. And I was very impressed back then…" Sighing, the old man finally started eating, popping a fish ball into his mouth.
"Don't be upset, Hokage-sama," I patted him on the arm, as I couldn't reach his shoulder. "Everyone feels things subjectively. Don't blame yourself. I think that a nindo is, of course, important, but it's different for everyone."
"It is the foundation of life…" he said, almost painfully. "What thousands live for. But you, Naruto, are probably right."
We ate in silence for half a minute, until the old man, having "recovered" a bit from his sadness, cheered up. All to ask me a question:
"Naruto, have you already chosen your nindo?"
I thought about it. Grind so I don't die? A temporary one, I guess I have. Why not share it, after adapting and embellishing it a bit?
"Not my main one… more of a draft. It's similar to the Will of Fire. But different. Unfortunately, I have no one and nothing to protect, except myself." I stirred my ramen with my chopsticks, then turned to Hiruzen. "You can protect yourself better than I could, hah. As for me… I want to protect myself and what will become important to me. Perhaps friends… maybe someday… a family. But also to protect what I create with my own hands. Maybe some organization, a company, or something else. And for that, I need strength…"
"One can only be truly strong when protecting what is dear. But, you know…" wisdom shone in the old man's eyes. "Don't put it off. I've seen many shinobi who put their lives on hold. They thought they weren't worthy now of what they would gain in the future… As if they would start living for real later… But only their minds lived in the dreams of the future, while their bodies suffered in reality."
"Perhaps…"
I pondered his words. And it's true, I have no one close. In the time that has passed, only Hiruzen could be called that. And even that's a stretch, as I'm not completely honest with him. But the future… right now I really need time to start living more fully—more carefree. It's difficult… the threat will always hang over me. And it seems to me that only by becoming much stronger will I be able to convince myself to focus on something else. For now, I'll change the subject.
"I've heard many tales of heroes who sacrificed themselves for their cause. And… I don't like it. Why didn't they protect themselves first? They could have started over."
"Oh… Naruto, we are not immortal. Sometimes, what needs to be protected is so great that a lifetime is not enough to restore it. Konoha… we live as one big family. We, the shinobi, protect this family. But if Konoha falls, neither I nor anyone else will be able to rebuild it."
"Hmm… speaking of Konoha, do you mean its people?"
"That's right. Hashirama united us, and then passed his will to his brother, Tobirama. He, in turn, passed his will to me. And I… to the deceased Fourth. It's a tragedy that the young Kage sacrificed himself. But we can see that it was not in vain. Konoha will continue to stand, just as he wished."
"That does make sense… as long as the one who protects is mortal. Hmm. So, for any goal to become more significant, one must become immortal. That way, we will always be with what we live for. I think I'll make immortality one of my side goals. As for my main goal, I'll decide on that in the future."
Hiruzen's eyebrows twitched, and his eyes clouded over with memories.
"Naruto… I must tell you something else: rushing headlong toward your goal is not always right. We do not live alone. Do not let yourself be blinded… do not step over the heads of those who called you comrade. Every life is precious, do not forget that."
"…"
Silence fell. I, in turn, remembered the rumors that had recently spread through the hospital, about a certain Orochimaru becoming a rogue-nin. As I recall, he was Hiruzen's student… And now I might have unwittingly touched a raw nerve. Orochimaru, I remember, craved immortality, and for that, he resorted to any means necessary. That was what the Hokage had just warned me against. And that's why he had changed the subject a bit abruptly.
That was awkward.
"I assure you, I remember," I began slowly, choosing my words. The statement "every life is precious," on one hand, I strongly disliked. But I couldn't articulate my thought well. "The importance of another's life… is a complex concept. On one hand, everyone is indeed important. On the other hand, there are those who must be killed. Because they threaten those who are dear. Did you kill the enemies of Konoha, Hokage-sama?"
One might think that if I had stood up and walked, the clang of my steel balls would have echoed down the street. I mean, asking such provocative questions to a Kage. But Hiruzen was the kind of person you could ask such questions. Because he genuinely valued those around him and treated them with understanding. This was especially true for those close to him, a group to which, I'm almost certain, he considered me a part of.
Hiruzen was initially taken aback by my question. But then a sadness and a certain weariness crept into his posture. His eyes, downcast, were fixed on his bowl of ramen.
"I… it was unavoidable. That is also what it means to be a ninja—to do what is necessary to protect the village. Every death leaves a mark. On the soul. On the conscience. Even if it is the death of an enemy. I regret it…"
"You said not to live in the future. But I see the trail of the past following you. Even if it's deep inside… I don't understand how you can regret those who wanted to cause harm. I think that when a person lays claim to another's life, in that same instant, they lose the value of their own. At least, in the eyes of the person they want to kill. Our goal is to try to live in such a way that such cases happen as little as possible. It's not always possible to negotiate… but often it is."
"Hmm," the old man grunted after about five seconds, then added thoughtfully, "Words too mature for such a young man."
"Perhaps," I shrugged.
"How do you plan to avoid situations where you don't have to kill someone?" a flicker of interest crossed his face.
"The simplest way is to demonstrate that you can negotiate. To think about what compromises can be reached."
"Oh… Naruto, that doesn't always work. A compromise is when both sides give something up. But some people… don't want to give anything up."
"They don't see an equal?"
"That's one way to put it."
Here it is, a good opportunity for my plan…
"Then you also need strength. At a minimum, not much inferior. But better—many times superior!" I smiled and reached for my ramen again.
Hiruzen, meanwhile, fell into thought. It seemed he was starting to move on from the heavy topic I had burdened him with… It's a good thing he's a fairly positive person and quickly regains a good mood. I approve of that, and I try to be the same way myself.
"Strength, even in good but unskilled hands, can cause harm."
"And, speaking of which… We were discussing the ninja way. And I want to become one of them. Will you help me with that, Hokage-sama?"
"Oh…" he looked at me thoughtfully, then turned away again and straightened his posture. "To be honest, I wanted to give you more time for a childhood. But you've grown up so fast…"
"Hah, so I was destined to become a ninja?"
"Um, you see… I can't tell you why just yet, but most likely, yes."
"Will you put up an external illusion? It seems this conversation is becoming private."
"You know about genjutsu?"
Hiruzen formed a series of a couple of dozen hand signs, after which the air around us seemed to shimmer for a moment.
"I've set up a barrier that distorts images through color and doesn't let sound through. This is ninjutsu. This way, we won't be overheard or have our lips read. Have you studied this topic in detail, Naruto?" his curiosity grew. Hiruzen was a shinobi known as "The Professor" for knowing all of Konoha's techniques. From this, it's clear that he's interested in the subject of these very techniques.
"As much as I could. And not without success," I said. Two threads shot out from my fingers, latched onto my chopsticks, and lifted them.
"Wh-what?" he stared at me in astonishment.
I tried to pick up some noodles with the chopsticks, but the chakra thread trembled and jerked, breaking the wooden stick against the bowl with a crack.
"Ahem… Well, there you have it. I haven't learned very much on my own. And I feel like I'm capable of much more," I said. I must have gotten nervous… Usually, my control is much more precise.
"That's… impressive," Hiruzen said, shifting his gaze to the broken chopstick.
"So, will you take me on for training?"
He thought again, this time for about ten seconds. But he only shook his head in denial with disappointment.
"I'm sorry, Naruto. I don't have much time," he said, and continued immediately, not giving me a chance to ask him to at least recommend a reading list. "But that doesn't mean I won't address this issue! Of course, I will assign you several teachers. They will teach you the basics, and then we'll see which areas you're interested in."
"…Thank you, Hiruzen-sama," I was genuinely grateful. "This is very important to me."
"Come on, Naruto. I'm your guardian, after all. How could I abandon you?"