" Oh, is this yours?" a female voice said while dangling an object with her fingers.
She was a teen wearing a school uniform, with white skin, blue eyes, and black hair.
"It's mine," my voice responded to her question while my eyes focused on the object in her hand.
"Yours?" she questioned me in mock surprise.
"Give it back," I said weakly.
Normally, I would not have responded to her after that mocking tone, but I did so today against my better judgment.
The hairpin in her hand was quite important to me.
"What did you say?" her eyes started to squint dangerously at me.
"Please give it back," I repeated in a pleading tone.
I still made my request even at the sign that she was getting angry.
"Onee-san, did you just tell me what to do?" her voice was sharp this time, a sign that she was definitely angry now.
I flinched when she called me sister because, although it's true, she only uses that term when she's about to do something bad to me.
"No... no... I would never, I just need that hairpin," I tried to explain to her, but my words couldn't flow out fluently.
How dare I ever think of ordering my younger sister around.
That's equivalent to abandonment.
"Hmm, but you told me to give you the hairpin though," she emphasized the word give.
She's right though.
Why did I do that?
The hairpin is something my sister wants.
And I should always give my sister whatever she wants.
After all, I'm just a disgusting monster that exists solely for my sister's benefit.
But... but... it was a gift to me.
It's not right to give it to someone else without permission... right?
"No... no, it's just that it's not pretty at all, so it doesn't suit someone as beautiful as my younger sister."
"Younger sister," the girl said in a disgusted tone.
Ah, I messed up.
She doesn't like it when I call her younger sister... or anything at all.
I have to think of something quick.
"Besides, it's all worn out and the color has faded along with its basic design... it's unworthy of the Mori family," I said.
True to my words, the hairpin was designed after a peony flower, so the design was very simple.
After years of use, it had worn out and looked ugly now.
In conclusion, it was basically trash.
But it was my sentimental trash.
"Then why do you want it back then? Just let me keep it for you," she said.
"I'll give you something better," I said while mentally calculating how much money I make from my numerous jobs.
"Hmm, but you don't have anything," she said.
"I can work more jobs and buy something for you," I said, though my hours are already stretched past my limit.
"The problem you're missing, dearest sister, is that your salary is already mine, and I don't need something I already have," she said.
"I... I..."
"That's quite selfish of you, Onee-san."
"All I want is this old rusty hairpin, and you refuse to give it to me."
"I thought you promised to be less selfish and work harder for Mom and Dad."
"What a disappointment you are."
"Honestly, it breaks my heart to have to tell them about this."
I couldn't refute those words because she was right.
After being cast away by my parents and pleading for forgiveness, I was told to try my best to take care of my little sister.
And I had worked hard to the point that my parents even looked at me for a minute.
Though they were disgusted at me, and their gaze was conveying disdain—
But at least they acknowledged me for that one minute.
I was happy... so... so happy.
But they might never look at me again if I let my selfishness get the better of me.
But is it really selfish to give up the last gift I got from my grandmother, who died from the earthquake that shook the world?
The hairpin carries the sentimentality of the year I was happy with Mom and Dad.
"Then you can have it," my sister said, stretching out her hand to me.
I could just reach out and take it from her hand.
In fact, my hands flinched once she stretched the hairpin out to me.
But if I did, then I would be selfish.
I would choose to be selfish and get my parents' disappointment as a result.
They already dislike me due to my condition, which affected my eyes, hair, and skin.
What if they completely abandon me?
I should just listen to my sister and give it up.
Even though it makes my heart hurt and I feel like crying.
But it's not like I'm completely new to being hurt.
After all, the sorrow and depression after I found out about my incurable defect was much worse.
That day, I could see the loving gaze from my parents disappear in an instant.
Then it became what it is now.
Embarrassment, disgust, and hatred.
"You can take it," I said with a choke in between.
"Really?" my sister said sarcastically.
Obviously, due to the fact that she knew I would definitely say yes.
"I was just joking with you about giving it back."
"After all, everything I have is for my sister," I said stiffly.
My sister smiled at me and kept the peony hairpin in her pocket.
"Good girl. But a bitch needs to be taught properly to ensure this 'joke' doesn't repeat itself," my sister said.
"Don't you agree, Onee-san?" her smile curved up until it was a sly smile.
I nodded.
How could I not agree?
How dare I ever disagree?
"As expected of my sister. Now, how should I educate you?" her eyes wandered around the girl's bathroom.
My eyes also surveyed the empty bathroom containing only two people.
No, wait—there was someone else in one of the toilet stalls who wasn't moving.
I hoped she wouldn't come out and join my sister to bully me.
With my reputation, then it was a major possibility.
"Bring that bucket of water over there," my sister made her final judgment.
I followed her instructions and brought a bucket full of brown mop water.
Inside, I was worried about getting wet.
There was an important class I had to go to, scheduled for second period.
If I miss it due to wardrobe malfunctions, then I would lose out on the lesson completely.
I don't have any friends to borrow notes from, neither do I have the right to speak to my classmates.
And it's very important I get good grades because I take tests and exams on my sister's behalf.
After all, straight A's is what got her the position of Class Representative.
And that's impressive in a school of elitist children.
The school is obviously in cooperation, and my family is very powerful.
They are one of the major pillars to emerge after the terror of the natural disasters.
So children of such families must be outstanding.
That's why a disfigured freak like me must be cast aside to maintain dignity.
"Pour it on yourself," my sister said, much to my sadness.
It was the worst outcome, but I still obeyed to appease her anger.
The water was smelly and murky, soaking my uniform completely.
I was dripping water onto the floor.
The restroom was flooded with water, and it leaked outside the door.
I even heard the sound of sliding shoes due to someone slipping.
"Tsk, next time you should probably just drink it."
My sister's shoes were soaked.
"I'll buy you a new one," I said.
Meanwhile, my salary wouldn't be enough to buy one of the same quality.
Even though I work from the time school ends till when it is time to lock the girls' dormitory.
And I am weaker than normal girls due to my disease, which makes the sun deeply affect me.
Honestly, I was happy during the cloudy weather in recent times.
But for some reason, there is such nice weather today.
Anyway, I feel like these are all excuses for my weakness.
I mean, just getting a few nosebleeds and skin burns shouldn't stop me from satisfying my sister.
"As long as you understand."
"I'm meant to be a shadow for you," I said.
It's not like I have a choice in this.
"Now hurry to class and work hard for me," she said while bringing out her phone to take pictures of me.
I walked to the sink after she was done taking pictures.
I removed my blazer and tried to squeeze out as much water as possible.
I didn't look in the mirror because I'm already sure of what I would see.
A monster with pale, transparent skin displaying each and every single blood vessel available, just like a grotesque artwork of lines.
Honestly, with this appearance, it's no wonder I'm an outcast and treated like a monster.
Funny thing is, I still beg those same people for forgiveness for it.
I crawl back to them like an abandoned puppy, still begging for praises.
And that's because I can't escape from the mold I was told to follow.
I can't argue back at those who insult me.
I'm just too...
Suddenly, the stall of one of the toilets opened, revealing a female student standing weirdly.
Her back was sunken in, and her hair covered her face due to her head facing down.
There were black spots covering her visible skin.
Then she tried to lunge at my sister, but my sister screamed and dodged.
"What are you staring at, come and help!" my sister shouted at me.
"Huh... me... I..." I was scared at how ferocious that leap at my sister was.
My legs couldn't move and my whole body was shaking.
My sister glared at me and made her way to my position.
"Fine then, if you don't want to help, then I'll just give you up."
"After all, you're useless," she said as she pushed me to the student.
The student wasted no time biting deep into my shoulder.
I didn't try to struggle at all, and I didn't feel anger at my sister, even as I watched her abandon me decisively, along with the hairpin on the ground.
I screamed with tears streaming down my eyes.
Soon my throat filled up with blood, and I was choking it out.
My life flashed before my eyes, and it was filled with me putting my head down in front of everyone.
I never once fought or argued, but only accepted my lesser position.
Then my thoughts turned to the present.
Is this what death feels like?
It's surprisingly comfortable to have all your senses slip away into emptiness.
Anyway, this is a fitting end for someone like me.
He he.
The end is coming soon.