Hello there, reader. I know you're there.
Ryo walks with a nonchalant face, attempting to blend into the crowd.
My name is Ryo Kamito. I'm the creator of everything in this realm. You might be wondering what such a powerful being like me is doing here, amongst my creations, I probably have better things to do, right?
Wrong.
Turns out being an eternal, omnipotent, omniscient, omnipresent being is boring as shit, I need something to entertain myself with. Like humans! Humans have such funny expressions when you break that meaningless thing they call, 'the law'. Just watch!
Ryo saunters into the bank, holding the unconscious bodies of the security guards he quickly dealt with, and yells. "EVERYONE GET DOWN ON YOUR HANDS AND KNEES -Oh wait, no, that sounds really sexual- I MEAN, EVERYONE RAISE YOUR HANDS UP IF YOU DON'T WANT TO DIE. DROP EVERYTHING YOU MAY HAVE."
Everyone immediately does as they're told.
The bank clerk, a purple haired and purple eyed woman, yells. "Please, don't hurt anyone! I'll show you straight to the vault!"
Wait a second... Shit. That's a Kamito! That's my relative!
Ryo clears his throat, suddenly a little less sure of himself. "Ah yes, show me the vault and no one gets hurt."
The bank clerk nodded. "Follow me."
They both walk to the vault, the bank clerk enters a code in and unlocks it. Ryo looks inside and is appalled.
Ryo stutters. "T-That's it?"
The bank clerk looks at Ryo, confused. "What do you mean? This is one of the most prestigious and acclaimed banks in the country!"
Ryo says sarcastically. "What are you acclaimed for? Protecting air?"
The bank clerk looks inside. "We're not seeing the same things, Robber-san."
Ryo shoots a sidelong glance at the bank clerk. "One, don't call me that. Two, it's just not that much money."
The bank clerk was offended. "There's 350,000,000,000 ryo in there! What are you talking about?"
Ryo says, unimpressed. "I've seen more. Man, I really wasted my time coming here. Here, have this." Ryo uses his Isorotomatai to create an extremely valuable metal. "You clearly need it more than me."
The bank clerk gasps. "T-That's Ikotorix! Why did you even feel the need to rob a bank if you can make that!?"
Ryo rolls his eyes. "Because I would've had to find a buyer, get certified as a seller, probably get investigated for having one of the most valuable materials on the planet, probably get televised and only then would I get the money. Compare that to walking down the street and into the nearest bank to steal their money. A lot less work, don't you think?"
The bank clerk nodded. "That's true... well, thank you for your patronage, I guess?"
Ryo says, disappointment clearly displayed on his face. "And thank you, for wasting my time."
Ryo leaves the bank, his head hung low as he didn't manage to accomplish his goal of breaking the law.
You have no one else to blame other than yourself. You could've just grabbed a couple million and left, but NOOO, you were being stupid and gave them a valuable metal instead!
Oh hey there, author. I see you're being a bitch as always. Did you seriously think I didn't grab a few million while she wasn't looking? I'm not stupid.
Oh.
Ryo opens the door to his house, runs up the stairs and shoves his money into the medium-sized safe at the top of his wardrobe. Now that he's fulfilled his daily quota of crime, he peacefully goes to sleep at 3:42AM.
4 hours and 18 minutes later, at 6:00AM, Ryo wakes up. He quickly gets ready for school, putting more effort into his appearance than usual due to there being a big ceremony today. Noticing that he still has time, he sits down on the sofa and turns on the TV. He scrolls through the channels, until something on the news channel caught his eye.
The news reporter speaks with a stoic face, but there is a gleam of astonishment in her eyes. "This just in, a gentleman just walked into Ikamatei bank central, offered Ikotorix for the measly price of 3 million ryo, which is, a million times less than its true value, and promptly left. We will now cut to Mikoto Sato, a bank clerk who claims to have witnessed the whole thing."
My relative's on TV?! Nice.
It cut to footage of a stunned Mikoto. "He was a thief, or an attempted one at least... I led him to the vault, he looked inside, he looked at 350 billion ryo and asked me if that was it. If 350 billion ryo was it? Is he stupid? He's a thief, so clearly he's poor, yet he had the audacity to say that. I was so, so confused. I asked him what he was talking about. He looked at me with disappointment, and SOMEHOW conjured the Ikotorix out of thin air, and gave it to me. He told me I needed it, and then he left. He must have taken a few million ryo while I wasn't looking. I guess best case scenario happened?"
And she's slandering me.
It cuts back to the news reporter. "None of the other witnesses have corroborated Sato-san's account, it may just be that she's still reeling from shock. The other witnesses say that a man, who's face they can't quite remember, strolled into the bank and loudly requested Sato-san's attention as he held the Ikotorix in his hand, who then lead him to the vault. They assume that a deal occured from there on, which is quite different from Sato-san's account of things. That's all the information we have for now. Now, let's move onto the bushfires in Mekotoria-"
Ryo turned the TV off, he then put his shoes on and started walking to school, his head in the clouds.
I hope I'll see Mikoto-san again, hopefully not while I'm robbing her.