I had transmigrated into an otome game.
The main stage was a place called Reveille Academy, set in a medieval fantasy world where magic was highly developed.
It was a typical otome dating sim where the female protagonist, 'Sierra,' gets entangled with five men and ultimately chooses one.
I had transmigrated into an extra character in that game.
My name was Emil Tier.
I was a nobleman of moderate standing, a plain character with no particular distinguishing features.
However.
I had obtained something called a transmigration perk.
[Miracle of Despair – You will never accept any bad ending!]
'Oh! Is this a luck-enhancing perk?'
When I first saw the perk, I was overjoyed.
It seemed to be a perk that increased bad ending avoidance at first glance.
For me, someone who wished to live a peaceful and uneventful life in this world, it was a welcome perk.
And, as expected, a mission appeared for me, the transmigrator.
Ding!
[Find true love and embrace a happy destiny!]
[※Warning! If you fail to obtain true love, you will reach a bad ending!]
True to a dating simulation, it was a mission to 'fall in love.'
The fact that the target of 'love' wasn't specified here seemed to imply that I could fall in love with another ordinary extra, like myself.
But I had a perk!
Because of that, I decided to take on a rather bold challenge.
That was to capture an original heroine!
However, that heroine wasn't the protagonist, 'Sierra.'
'Of course, it's impossible for an extra like me to go after the protagonist.'
Sierra was destined to end up with one of the five male leads.
And those five were 'over-spec' handsome men who were difficult to defeat no matter who came along.
I gave up on Sierra from the very beginning.
But that was fine.
What I was aiming for was the 'villainess,' a character positioned as Sierra's rival.
Specifically, the five heroines who would later be abandoned by the five male leads.
In truth, 'villainess' was just a name; they were merely characters in an antagonistic position to Sierra.
Playing this game, I felt a considerable attraction to these five villainesses.
They were beautiful, sincere in love, and I particularly liked how they would stop at nothing to achieve their goals.
However, in the end, they were defeated by the protagonist.
I felt sorry for them.
It truly resonated with me, how these women, who had done their best, were abandoned by the male leads and met regrettable ends.
Therefore.
'If you're going to abandon them, I'll take them!'
It was with such a light heart that I intended to win over one of those heroines.
After all, I had the bad ending avoidance ability called [Miracle of Despair].
Of course, that didn't mean I intended to take someone who's been used and discarded.
I didn't want to get involved with women who had truly fallen in love with the male leads, gone through all sorts of hardships, and then were completely abandoned.
My goal was to be their first love!
I was simply going to 'pre-capture' one of the 'villainesses who would be abandoned in the future' and make her my heroine.
Anyway, I knew their capture methods well.
Subsequently.
I tried to capture one of them.
'I truly love you. Will you be my woman?'
'...Yes.'
The result was romantic, successful.
I successfully captured one heroine.
It wasn't that difficult.
Since I already knew her painful past, I slowly approached her by filling the emptiness in her heart.
Naturally, we grew closer than anyone else and fell in love.
I felt happy.
'It's a relief I transmigrated….'
I considered transmigration a blessing.
Furthermore.
I was also grateful for the bad ending avoidance perk called [Miracle of Despair].
However.
'...What did you say?'
That was my misconception.
'I'm sorry….'
From the beginning, to 'her,' I was merely a second-string backup.
'But I truly love him…! This feeling isn't a lie…!'
'Then what about me….'
'Emil….'
'What were all those things we did together, then?'
'I'm sorry…. I'm sorry for hurting you….'
After becoming lovers with one of them.
The story unfolded differently from the game.
'Even so, I really can't be without him now….'
Among the five male leads.
The man who was originally supposed to abandon her.
Took her away.
'Don't screw with me…. I was serious…. If it was going to be like this, …you shouldn't have accepted me in the first place…!!'
She, who had clearly promised me love, fell for his seduction far too easily.
Like a prostitute who sells her body for money.
…After that, there was only pain.
I had given my sincerity.
Because I had truly loved her.
'Haah, hmmm…. *Smooch*, haah….'
The moment I discovered her and that bastard kissing passionately, my heart tore apart.
'You son of a bitch━!! How dare you━!!'
'Kyaa━! Stop it! Emil━!!'
'Who's this bastard? Get lost?!'
'Aargh!'
I even lunged at the man, fueled by revenge.
The result was a crushing defeat.
It was an obvious outcome.
He, the male lead, was 'over-spec.'
There was no way I could defeat him with strength.
In the end, I was miserably beaten up in front of the woman I loved.
'Ha, haha…. Hahahaha…!'
Laughter spilled out as despair set in.
It was agonizing.
I thought a torn heart couldn't ache more than this.
But greater pain existed.
That pain was unbearable.
I despaired.
My mind crumbled.
'...'
Darkness enveloped my heart.
The darkness, which seeped into my heart like black paint dropped into a water bucket.
Drove me to an extreme choice.
In a way, it was the only revenge I could take.
Death.
I would die in front of her.
I would make her regret it.
With that thought, I prepared a rope and went up to the rooftop.
If I hanged myself on the rooftop of the academy's main building, all the students coming to school would see it.
Thus.
My first life came to an end.
And then.
*Swish*….
Ding!
[You have reached a bad ending. 'Miracle of Despair' activates.]
The moment I took my own life.
I realized the truth of my transmigration perk.
'What the hell….'
That's right.
What I thought was a luck-based perk for bad ending avoidance.
Was exactly as described.
An ability that, upon reaching a bad ending, allowed me to avoid that ending.
In short, a reset.
I returned to the point in time before I had even attempted to capture her, to when I first transmigrated.
'Oh my god….'
Ding!
[As a secondary effect of 'Miracle of Despair,' 'Mental Healing' activates.]
It was an incredible power.
My mind, which had been corrupted by darkness, cleared.
A new opportunity!
Another chance had been given to me.
Regression was salvation granted to my despairing self.
'It was my fault for choosing that damn bitch. I picked her because she had the biggest chest, and look what happened.'
With my recovered mental state, I laughed like that and cast the nightmare of the previous loop to the back of my mind.
It was a new beginning!
Anyway, there were five heroines I liked!
Only one of them had a trashy, prostitute-like mentality.
This time, all I had to do was find true love.
And then.
Ding!
[Find true love and embrace a happy destiny!]
'Sorry, but that's just how it turned out.'
Ding!
[Find true love and embrace a happy destiny!]
'A faint, insincere chuckle, "Ah hyah hyah, I really did love you too, Emil."'
Ding!
[Find true love and embrace a happy destiny!]
'Ugh…. Shut up, I'm just not sincere about you anymore.'
Ding!
[Find true love and embrace a happy destiny!]
'What, didn't you hear me? I don't need you anymore.'
After subsequently going through four more regressions.
I realized my choice wasn't wrong.
I wasn't the one who was wrong.
All five of them were trash.
Even worse, all five of them.
Were seduced by the very men who would have originally abandoned them, and betrayed me.
'Damn it, damn it, DAMN IIIIIT━!!'
Of course, each time I had approached them sincerely, I had genuinely suffered.
In the end, I despaired.
And met a cruel end, seeking revenge on them.
Praying only that they would regret it and grieve.
But in the very last instance.
I, who was betrayed even by the fifth woman.
Realized that my expectations had also been betrayed.
Ding!
[Fifth Bad Ending acquired! An additional event CG will be awarded for achieving all bad endings!]
Additional event CG.
It was like a hidden CG usually obtained upon reaching the true ending of a dating simulation game.
However, for me, who had transmigrated into the game, that CG was delivered as a video.
'Aaah…! Yes…! I love you…! More, much more…! Fill me up…!'
In that video, they were panting like prostitutes.
Moreover, the video's timestamp was the very day I died.
Even after witnessing my death.
━That very night, they were coupling with those bastards, making vulgar moans.
Furthermore, the women in the video were smiling happily.
"Please, get lost, please…."
I wanted to skip the video, but I couldn't.
In the dark space, only my consciousness existed.
And the system, cruelly, kept showing me the video.
The video only ended after all five women's acts of copulation were shown.
"What the hell is this? What do you want from me…?"
I mumbled in the darkness.
I hate this now.
I don't want this.
Transmigrating not as the protagonist, this was no blessing.
And this transmigration, with its continuous regressions, was no salvation either.
In a way, this was hell.
Perhaps I had committed a great sin before transmigrating.
And this was my punishment.
Such thoughts even crossed my mind.
"I just…. I just truly loved them…."
Ironically, at that moment, I recalled the happy moments I had with them.
Holding my hand, their cheeks flushed.
Blushing and sometimes getting angry over trivial skinship.
Sometimes shedding tears, confirming our sincerity to each other.
Like that.
I remembered the moments we had truly loved each other warmly.
The fleeting memories lasted only a few seconds.
But to me at that time, they were long moments.
To that extent, their love left in my heart had taken deep root.
And just as quickly as those roots were torn out.
A large, ragged hole had appeared in my heart.
Ding!
['Miracle of Despair' activates!]
Stop it.
Stop it now.
I can't do this anymore.
It won't work anyway.
Someone else?
Even if I find someone, she'll be taken away again.
Because this is that kind of story.
I'm just that kind of person.
Ding!
[Find true love and embrace a happy destiny!]
The mission appeared.
That message that appeared before my eyes every time I regressed.
But I buried my head in my knees.
Ding!
['Mental Healing' activates!]
*Whoosh!*
I felt the activation of a familiar ability.
That special power that healed my wounded heart after regression.
Normally, after receiving this healing, I would recover my resolve and challenge another heroine again.
However.
"No, I don't want to…. I don't want to be hurt anymore…."
A curse had already fallen upon my heart.
No matter how much my mental state recovered, the memories didn't disappear.
The moment my mind recovered, those memories, strongly embedded in my head, gouged at my heart again.
Furthermore, until now, there had been the 'hope' that other heroines existed.
But I, having been betrayed by the fifth heroine, had lost even that hope.
Therefore, I declared my surrender.
I simply buried my head in my knees and prayed for time to pass.
I don't want to fall in love.
They'll betray me anyway.
That's just how it is for an extra like me.
In the end, they just fall for those flashy guys easily.
I'm just like a self-esteem vending machine, there to temporarily fill their hearts.
I don't want to be hurt like that anymore.
So.
Stop now….
━Ding!
…The message sound that should have ended rang in my head once more.
Feeling that unfamiliar sensation, I instinctively raised my head.
A message I had never seen before appeared in my dead, fish-like eyes.
[Player's despair level has exceeded the threshold.]
[Would you like to adjust the difficulty?]
[Y/N]
"Diffi…, culty…?"
A message I had never seen before.
It was a message I had never seen during my five regressions.
Because of that.
I instinctively pressed the [Y] button.
Ding!
[Difficulty will be changed from [HARD] to [EASY]!]
[Additional perks will be granted according to the difficulty change!]
"What…?"
The difficulty is changing from Hard to Easy…?
So all this time, it was all Hard Mode…?
No, but capturing the heroines themselves wasn't that difficult, so why?
However, those questions completely vanished after I saw the next message.
Ding!
[Charm Teardrop – Women will perceive you as an extremely attractive individual!]
[Blooming Talent – Challenge anything. You will achieve it!]
[Sweet Voice – Your voice will possess a demonic charm. Anyone will easily accept your words!]
"Huh…."
An absurd string of perks appeared.
To think something like this existed.
Even considering five loops, with each loop lasting roughly a year.
This was the secret of my transmigration, discovered after five years.
At that absurd fact, my mind, which had been engulfed in despair, briefly returned to normal.
And next, a system explanation for Easy Mode followed.
Ding!
[Welcome to Easy Difficulty!]
[Easy Difficulty constantly provides 'Mental Healing'! Forget painful memories and challenge the happy ending!]
[However, 'Miracle of Despair,' which was a Hard Difficulty perk, will be revoked…, rev, rev, revoked…, rev…. rev-rev….]
But then.
Suddenly, the system window crackled, and an error message appeared.
Ding!
[An error has occurred due to increased despair level.]
[System reorganizing….]
[Complete.]
It was my first time experiencing something like this, so I stared blankly at the sight.
The end of the instruction message, which had clearly returned to normal.
Its content had changed.
[However, 'Miracle of Despair,' which was a Hard Difficulty perk, will change into 'Memory of Despair'!]
"Memory of Despair…?"
Was it playing a word game?
Annoyed by the absurdity, I first went into the system window and clicked on the perks section.
Below the Easy Mode perks I had just obtained, the newly acquired 'Memory of Despair' perk was listed.
"...What."
And when I saw its contents.
"Ha, haha, …hahahahaha!!"
I laughed like a madman.
It was delightful.
My mood couldn't possibly be bad.
"Hahahahahahaha━!!"
Indeed.
Transmigration was a blessing.
Regression was salvation.
[Memory of Despair – Reject their confessions! It will show them why!]