JIHOON
No cameras.No screaming fans.No managers tracking his every move.
Just sea breeze, coconut trees, and a big-ass bottle of SPF 100.
Exactly what Jihoon needed.
He stepped off the island van at El Nido's main beach in a black tank top, dark glasses, and a huge floppy straw hat that screamed:"I'm not famous, leave me alone."
It was perfect.Almost.
Except for one small, unfortunate detail:
He was completely, utterly, undeniably lost.
His translator bailed last minute with a "Sorry, lolo got sick " text and a peace sign emoji. The van driver who picked him up from the tiny airport smiled politely, said "Okay na po, dito na lang po kayo, sir!" and left him beside a palm tree with a tiny hand-written sign that read:
"El Nido La Vista Baby Resort. Ask for Ate Marites."
Jihoon stared at the paper like it would magically rearrange itself into Korean subtitles.
"Ate... Marites?" he mumbled, clutching his duffel bag like a child holding his favorite plushie during a thunderstorm. "Who the hell is Ate Marites?"
He scanned the beach. Tourists, locals, a group of teenage boys doing TikTok dances, and two girls aggressively haggling over a fake pearl anklet. But no one seemed to be waiting for him.
And more importantly—no one recognized him.No squeals. No camera flashes.No one yelling, "OH MY GOD IS THAT JIHOON FROM SOL—"Just vibes. Pure, sweaty, chaotic tourist vibes.
Good.
He took a breath and pulled out his phone. No signal. Of course. He shoved it back into his bag and turned toward a nearby food cart, lured by the scent of grilled fish and something sugary.
And that's when it happened.
His sneaker landed smack in the middle of a puddle of iced coffee.
One second of peace.One eternity of humiliation.
A dramatic yelp.
A cartoonish flail of limbs.
And then—
SPLAT.
His hat flew off like a frisbee.His sunglasses launched into a bucket of taho.His body slid directly into a massive basket of dried mangoes
ALTHEA
"Ay JUSKO, KUYA!"
Althea leapt over her food cart. The foreign tourist had just body-slammed her neighbor's mango display like it owed him money.
She rushed to the scene, apron flapping. Her eyes widened. The poor guy looked like he got drop-kicked by a coconut.
"I'm so sorry! Sorry po! Oh my God!" she yelled, crouching beside him. "Kuya, okay ka lang?! I swear, di ako 'to! Yung kape galing sa kabilang stall!"
The tourist groaned. Mango bits clung to his cheeks. His sunglasses dangled from one ear, and he blinked like he wasn't fully sure what planet he was on.
"You okay?" she asked, waving a hand in front of his face. "You—uh—okay?"
He blinked again. Then said solemnly:"…Ice coffee… dead."
"Dead?" Althea echoed.
He sat up and whispered, "Dead. Ice coffee. Me… slide."Then he gave her a thumbs up like he had just survived some horrible accident.
She blinked.
Oh no.He's hot.And stupid.
She cleared her throat. "Great English, oppa."
He tilted his head like a confused puppy. "Oppa?"
She snorted. "Never mind."
Ten seconds later, he was upright, brushing mango dust off his pants. He muttered something in weirdly charming Konglish that Althea couldn't quite catch. She watched him closely. Something about this man felt oddly familiar. Shampoo commercial? Some billboard?
He pulled out the crumpled paper from his pocket like it was a treasure map.
"Mango… Tree. Ate… Marites?"
Althea almost choked on her fishball.
"OH MY GOD," she said. "That's my boss!"
FIVE MINUTES LATER
"Welcome to El Nido La Vista Baby Resort!" Althea announced dramatically, flinging open the bamboo gate with a flourish. Jihoon stepped cautiously inside, his bag slung over one shoulder, his mango-scented dignity still somewhere back at the beach.
Jihoon blinked at the colorful chaos of the place.
It wasn't exactly… luxurious.
A hammock sagged sadly in one corner of the garden. A karaoke machine stood proudly next to a coconut tree, already set to max volume. A row of painted coconuts lined the front path like budget garden gnomes. Someone's chicken was doing laps around a half-broken fountain.
He looked around in awe. "...Resort?"
Althea smirked. "Three stars on Google." she proudly said
Jihoon said nothing. He just followed her toward the front desk, pausing to admire the giant mural on the wall. It showed a smiling cartoon mango with arms and sunglasses, surfing on a wave.
Above it, in neon pink paint, was a quote:"LIFE IS SHORT. EAT THE MANGO."
Jihoon tilted his head. "Is mango… food of love?"
Althea stared. "What?"
He pointed to the wall again. "Mango. Love?"
She snorted. "No, oppa. Mango is food of Vitamin C."
Jihoon blinked. Then smiled with way too much confidence. "Good. I love Vitamin C."
She groaned internally.He was giving golden retriever energy.Lost, clueless, vaguely famous energy.
He turned to her, clutching his sad plastic bag of crushed dried mangoes like it was the Holy Grail. "This... is gift?"
Althea laughed. "Sure. You can keep them. A souvenir from your dramatic entrance."
She handed him his room key and pointed down a narrow hallway lined with mismatched flip-flops.
"Your room's that way. Don't mind the lizard in the corner. He's the unofficial mascot."
Jihoon nodded solemnly, as if she had just given him sacred wisdom. "Lizard. Okay."
As he walked away, still dazed, she shook her head and muttered under her breath:
"Lord help me. His Hot."
TRANSLATIONS:
Jusko – "Oh my God" (Filipino slang, short for "Jesus ko")
Kuya – A respectful term for an older male, often used casually
Okay ka lang? – "Are you okay?"
Di ako 'to! Yung kape galing sa kabilang stall! – "It wasn't me! The coffee came from the other stall!"
Teh – Slang for "ate" or "sis," informal address among girls
Pasensya na po – "Sorry" or "Please forgive me"
Resort? – Jihoon questioning if this chaotic place is truly a resort