Guildmaster Peppin arrived the next morning, his expression as grim and serious as a tax auditor. He bypassed the Tea Nook and marched directly to the center of the main chamber, Gilda, Zazu, and Pip standing in line before him.
"Your 'training' has shown some… unusual results," Peppin began, his deep voice leaving no room for argument. "Now it is time for a real-world test for them."
He unrolled a map. "There is a small, abandoned shrine in the Whispering Woods, a day's ride from here. For the past month, something has taken up residence within it. It poses no physical threat. It does not attack travelers. Instead, it emits a powerful magical aura of… how to say, its some kind of aura of sadness."
Pip shuddered. Gilda looked confused.
"Any adventurer who approaches within fifty feet is overcome with an overwhelming sadness,"
Peppin explained. "They lose all will to fight, sit down on the ground, and begin to weep uncontrollably. I sent two of my strongest warriors last week. They are very tough men, but I found them crying into each other's beards, completely demoralized. Brute force is useless against this thing."
'A monster that weaponizes bad vibes,' I thought. 'How wonderfully inefficient.'
"Your mission," Peppin said, his stern gaze falling on Zazu and Pip, "is to go to this shrine. Gilda will accompany you for protection. You will withstand the aura, identify the source, and resolve the situation. Non-violently, if possible. I want to see if this 'Mental Fortitude' the Core has allegedly taught you is real, or just a pleasant dream."
(The Whispering Woods)
The woods were beautiful, but eerily quiet. As the trio approached the coordinates on the map, they began to feel it. It started as a faint, sad feeling, like remembering a song from your childhood that you could no longer name.
Gilda, the stoic warrior, felt a pang of loneliness. "This is a miserable place," she muttered, gripping her axe tighter, as if she could fight a feeling.
Pip, the nervous rogue, looked like he was on the verge of tears. "I just remembered my pet hamster from when I was a boy. His name was Sir Squeakington. He was a good hamster."
"Stay calm," Zazu said, his voice is like a steady anchor in this sea of sadness. He closed his eyes, his face a mask of concentration. He was building the mental walls Mochi had taught him to create in the Dreamscape. "Remember the goose. It's just a feeling. It cannot control you if you do not let it."
Pip took a shaky breath and nodded, trying to focus.
They finally reached a clearing. In the center was a small, ancient-looking stone shrine, covered in moss and vines. The air here was thick and heavy with a magical sorrow that was almost suffocating. Dotted around the clearing were several tough-looking adventurers from other guilds, sitting on the ground with their heads in their hands, sobbing quietly.
Gilda's iron will was straining. Her eyes were misty. "By the forge," she choked out, "I… I just thought about how I'll never be able to bake a pie as good as my grandmother's."
But Zazu and Pip, who had faced the pure, concentrated absurdity of the Goose of Unrelenting Annoyance, were prepared. They recognized the mental attack for what it was. They focused their minds, pushed past the waves of sadness, and walked steadily towards the shrine's entrance.
Inside, huddled in a dark corner, they found the source.
It wasn't a monster. It was a small, ghost-like creature made of shimmering tears and mist. It was a Grief Elemental, a rare being born from a place of great loss. It was all alone, and it was sobbing with a heartbreak so profound that it warped the very air around it.
(The Comfy Corner)
'It's a Grief Elemental?' FaeLina's psychic voice was full of surprise. 'They're incredibly rare! And powerful! Attacking it will only make it stronger!'
'They know,' I projected back, watching the scene unfold through my faint psychic link with my Sentinels.
In the shrine, Zazu and Pip looked at the small, weeping creature. They knew they couldn't fight it. Attacking it would be like trying to punch a memory.
Zazu remembered his second lesson: the Invincible Pillow. Not all enemies can be defeated with strength.
He didn't try to talk to the elemental. He simply sat down on the stone floor, a safe distance away, and began to quietly hum the gentle, calming lullaby from my Hibernation Hollows.
Pip, understanding immediately, reached into his pack. He pulled out not a dagger, but one of the lavender cookies Sloosh had packed for their journey. Very gently, he rolled the cookie across the floor until it stopped near the sobbing creature.
The Grief Elemental's cries faltered. It looked up, its misty, sad eyes fixing on the cookie. Slowly, it drifted towards the small offering and hesitantly took a nibble.
As it ate, the crushing aura of sadness that filled the clearing began to fade, replaced by a faint, hopeful warmth.
(The Comfy Corner - Some time's Later)
Back in my dungeon, a message from Guildmaster Peppin appeared on the bulletin board.
Gilda's report is… unbelievable. The creature was calmed and has dissipated. The mission was a complete success. Test passed, with full marks. Expect a bonus in our next payment.
Another, more official notification followed.
[Iron Gryphons have completed a 'Real-World Test'!]
[Your 'Dream Combat Training' method has been verified as effective!]
[New Dungeon Service Unlocked: 'Mental Wellness & Resilience Coaching'. You can now officially market and sell this training to other guilds.]
FaeLina saw the new service unlock, and her eyes lit up with the image of countless gold coins.
"Mochi! We can franchise!" she cheered. "We can create a whole chain of Comfy Corner training centers! The 'Cozy Core Method' will sweep the nation! We'll be bigger than the Adventurers League!"
Her boundless corporate ambition was, as always, the greatest threat to my peace and quiet.