The morning after the "Goose Incident," as it was now being called, the atmosphere in the Tea Nook was one of deep, philosophical contemplation. Zazu and Pip sat at their usual table, quietly staring into their teacups with the haunted look of veterans who had seen too much.
Gilda, their ever-practical captain, was trying to get a coherent report out of them. She held a quill and parchment, a deep frown etched on her face.
"So, explain it to me again," she said, her voice laced with the kind of patience one uses for a small, concussed child. "It was a goose... with a dagger... in its beak."
Pip shuddered, pulling his cloak tighter around himself. "It was the honking, Gilda. You weren't there. The honking was psychologically damaging."
Zazu, however, was more thoughtful. "The Core was right," he said, his voice quiet. "We have faced down liches and battled chimeras without a flicker of fear. But a creature of pure, concentrated absurdity... it broke our focus completely. Our minds are not as disciplined as we believed them to be."
He had truly understood Mochi's lesson.
'I have to admit, Mochi, it was brilliant,' FaeLina's voice buzzed in my mind. She had been secretly observing the dream, and was now offering her professional critique. 'Humiliation is a powerful teaching tool. You've shattered their warrior egos, and now you can rebuild them in your own, cozy image. It's wonderfully devious.'
'I just thought a goose would be funny,' I replied honestly.
That evening, Zazu and Pip returned to the Hibernation Hollows for their second lesson. This time, there was no nervousness in their eyes, only a grim, quiet determination. They would not be defeated by breakfast food or an angry bird ever again.
They drifted off to sleep and their dream-selves appeared on the now-familiar twilight beach.
'Welcome back, gentlemen,' my voice echoed around them from the dream itself. 'Your failure yesterday came from trying to fight the absurd with conventional force. Today, you will learn to embrace a different approach. Your opponent is a familiar one.'
With a soft poof, a single Pillow Fiend appeared on the sand before them. It wiggled its stubby arms happily.
'Your objective,' I explained, 'is to land a single, decisive blow on this creature. You may use any weapon you can imagine.'
Zazu and Pip exchanged a look. This seemed much easier than the goose.
"For the honor of the Iron Gryphons!" Zazu declared, and his hand erupted in magical fire. He conjured a magnificent, flaming sword and charged, swinging it in a perfect arc.
The flaming sword met the Pillow Fiend.
Fump.
The blade sank harmlessly into the deep, plushy cotton. The magical flames were snuffed out as if smothered by a wet blanket. The Pillow Fiend let out a happy little jiggle.
Zazu stared at his extinguished sword, completely baffled.
Pip saw his opening. He leaped back and conjured a storm of shadowy daggers in the air around him. "Try this, you fluffy menace!" he yelled, and unleashed the volley.
The daggers flew with perfect, deadly accuracy. They struck the Pillow Fiend all over its body... and stuck there, completely harmless, like pins in a cushion. The Pillow Fiend now looked like a very happy, very well-decorated throw pillow.
They tried everything. A giant warhammer that just bounced off with a muffled boing. A bolt of lightning that was absorbed into the cotton, making the Pillow Fiend glow gently for a few seconds. They even tried to summon a gust of wind to blow it away, but the pillow was surprisingly heavy.
They were exhausted, their dream-energy spent. Their most powerful attacks were completely useless against this happy, absorbent, and utterly invincible pillow.
Zazu finally stopped, panting. He looked at the invincible pillow. He remembered Mochi's first lesson: control your own mind. He remembered the other, off-hand advice I had given. Have you considered a hug?
"Pip, stop," Zazu said, a look of dawning realization on his face. "We're doing it wrong. We're still trying to fight force with force."
He let his conjured sword dissolve. He walked calmly up to the Pillow Fiend, which was still proudly displaying the daggers Pip had thrown at it. He didn't raise a hand to strike it.
Instead, he simply reached out and gave the pillow a firm, friendly pat on its "head."
A soft, happy chime echoed through the Dreamscape. A notification appeared before them.
[Opponent 'Pillow Fiend' has been successfully 'Subdued'!]
The Pillow Fiend let out a sound like a happy sigh, purred once, and then dissolved into motes of soft, golden light. They had won.
'Lesson two,' my voice echoed, filled with approval. 'Not all enemies can be defeated with strength. Some require a gentler touch. Well done. Class dismissed.'
They woke up in the real world, a look of profound understanding on their faces. Gilda was waiting for them. "How did it go?"
"We learned..." Zazu began, a slow smile spreading across his face, "...that sometimes, the best way to win a fight is to just be nice."
Gilda stared at him, then at Pip, then back at Zazu, her expression one of utter disbelief. "This dungeon," she muttered to herself, "is going to get us all killed."
Just then, a new message chimed on the Guild Bulletin Board. It was from Guildmaster Peppin.
Core. Your 'training' seems to be working. Their Mental Fortitude scores have shown a marked improvement. Prepare them for a real-world test. Details to follow.