These plans are great and all, but I have yet to pass the first hurdle. I have to talk to Loki- no, my family. I am quite lucky; Loki has a loving family. His father, Lucien Astreus, is the fifth strongest being in this world, and loves his family to death; he's like a teddy bear around them. Then his mother, Heather Astreus, the fifth daughter of the Raleigh conglomerate and is 'The Queen of Magic' who is like the personification of joy. Her presence always lights up any room she's in, no matter how gloomy it had been before. Finally, there's Rachel Astreus, my little sister. She's adorable. There's nothing else I can say, but she is the best sister any brother could ask for, except my sister Myria. I think when I was making Loki's family, I felt bad for the kid, so I made sure he at least had a family that loved him. Honestly, sometimes I envied him… Anyway, as I opened the large door to the dining room, I saw them; my family. Lucien, as always, sat at the head of the table, his white hair catching the sunlight and his black eyes lighting up with the light of a thousand stars when he caught sight of me. His face lit up with a smile full of warmth, the lines on his face becoming more pronounced and transforming the calm and cold mask into one of love. To his side sat my mother; her tawny hair tied back in a messy bun, revealing her light chestnut eyes, which held a playful spark. Then, in the seat next to mine was my little sister, Rachel. It's quite funny really; she looked like a carbon copy of our mother. The only difference was her speckling of freckles across her nose and cheeks, and her dark brown eyes, which looked like a mix of my father's and mother's eyes. As she spotted me, her face lit up as if the sun had just entered the room. I continued walking in, feeling a mix of guilt and warmth grow within the pit of my stomach with every step.
"Nice of you to finally join us, Loki! I thought you had finally managed the impossible and got lost in your own bedroom." My father said in his usual jovial tone that he had around us. Unfortunately, it's a well-known fact in my family that I have the most gods awful sense of direction. I have gotten lost in our mansion many times, and my family will never let me live it down.
"Dad!! My sense of direction isn't that bad." I exclaimed in exasperation. The response felt so natural, like nothing had changed, which shocked me to my core and made me finally realise that I was no longer Luke Evergreen. I had become Loki Astreus; we were now one. It felt strange because as I finally felt the acceptance click into place, it felt like something that had been missing my whole life had finally been found. I looked around again at my family and finally the guilt that had knotted up in my stomach unravelled, and I could finally smile at them all with the warmth of knowing that I had a family again. 'If only Myria were here too…' The thought slipped into my mind from a place unknown to me. Its words poisoned my psyche, and I realised I was still worried about my other sister. I tried pushing it away and focusing on the present, but it just kept sneaking its way back to the forefront of my mind. So, instead of letting it take over, I made one final decision as Luke Evergreen.
"Hey, Mum, Dad, Rachel. Could we take a picture together? I want to take pictures of my life, so later I can look back on all the happy moments in it." While it wasn't the full truth, it wasn't a lie either. I wanted to do this to show Myria everything I had done with pride. So that one day I could regale her with my many adventures with a smile on my face. My voice interrupted the silent but warm meal we were having, causing them to look up. At first, I saw shock, as if I had spoken some alien language, but then I saw their faces break into wide but happy grins.
"As if you needed to ask us, Starlight." My mum responded, causing both my dad and sister to nod vigorously.
"Yeah, Loki, what's with the formality, announcing it at the breakfast table like you were telling us you were going to war. You had me scared." Rachel followed up, teasing me as we had always done. I looked around at their smiling faces, and I felt the love of a whole family for the first time in a long while. Something warm and wet slid down my cheek, and I realised I was crying. Not out of sadness, no. It was relief, as if part of the weight I had carried for years had finally slid off. One tear turned into two. Then it turned into my sobbing, like I had just escaped a horrible dream.
"I-I'm sorry… I just had a really long nightmare…" I sputtered out, the years worth of stress and pain finally lightening. I felt bad as my parents must've been shocked, but I just couldn't hold it in anymore. The weight was crushing me. I felt warmth make its way into me as my parents came over to hug me.
"Oh, Starlight, what happened, baby? Are you okay? Mum's here if you need to talk." I heard from my left.
"Yeah, kiddo, you never have to worry. Did someone call you terrifying again?" Mum and Dad's arms wrapped around me as if they were protecting me from the world that was trying to hurt me. My tears finally abated at the feeling of my parents' warmth. Then the embarrassment hit, causing my cheeks to flush red with a warm heat I hadn't felt in a while.
"No… nothing like that; it was just a long, long dream…" My eyes became unfocused and glassy as I tried to push the thoughts to the back of my mind. I wished to dwell on them more… to process them more. However, I had more pressing things to worry about. My parents looked at me, the concern obvious in their exchanged glances, but they decided not to push it, which I appreciated. Once my parents and sister went back to their seats, breakfast started up again, though this time with a light conversation rippling through the air. It gave me some time to think. Which, admittedly, was a dangerous thing.
"D'you reckon that it's desecration if the god is dead?" My musing cut through the conversation like the blade of a guillotine, halting everything in its tracks. I couldn't help it. The thought was interesting.
"…"
"Loki, do you have something you wish to tell us?" Dad responded, his voice a mix of concern and curiosity.
"Huh? Did I say that out loud?"
"Yes, honey, you did in fact say that out loud." Mum cut in.
"Ah…" My voice tapered off as I fell back into my thoughts. 'Does it really matter anyway?' I continued. This time, keeping my thoughts inside my head. Truly a question I don't think I'll ever have the answer to.