"So, Kiyomi, this is where we must part—but before we do, would it be fine if you stayed here with me for a bit? I'm waiting for Kumiko before we head home," Olympia asks.
After lunch, the day went by like normal. Nothing interesting happened. Nothing interesting was learned.
It seems Kumiko will be sticking close to Olympia for now. I guess she wants to keep her under her nose. Wait…is that even the right phrase? I guess it doesn't matter. Butterflies don't have noses anyway.
"Are you coming up with dumb puns in your head again? Wait…you're nothing. You don't even have a head! That's beautiful," Olympia jabs.
"You know, for someone who just asked me to keep them company, you're doing a lot of bullying."
"Consider it a kindness. Anyway, I don't know what's keeping Kumiko so long. She doesn't have after-school counseling, does she?"
"No, even I think that would be overkill. But hey, maybe it's a blessing. Gives me more time to harass you."
"Did you mean to say something other than harass?"
"Ah, heavens, my apologies! I meant to say it gives me more time to cherish this moment with the school's local pervert."
Geez…even in this iteration, I'm still known as the local pervert.
Wait—that reminds me.
"Olympia, are there any clubs centered around me at school?"
"Hmm…there's no official club, but I think I'd rather keep what I do know a secret. However...I can tell you something else about yourself, if you'd like."
"Only if it's something good."
"Well…there's a rumor going around about you."
"A rumor? About me? You're joking, right? Why would my name be on anyone's lips? I try my best to keep my head down. In school. In life, too."
"Pfft—"
She tries to stifle a laugh, but a giggle slips out. What about that was funny?
"Anyway," she continues, "do you want to know what the rumor is?"
"Maybe it's better if I don't get involved in petty antics."
"Yeah, maybe. The rumor is that you've been…entranced by a witch."
Thanks for respecting my wishes.
A witch, huh? She's messing with me. I'll play along.
"Oh? You've heard about her, too? Shame. I was hoping to keep that relationship a secret. Let's not talk about this any further."
"What!?" she yelps, jaw dropping. I think I just saw a fly fly into her mouth—pure protein.
"I've said too much. If I tell you more, she might come after you. And trust me—she's not very friendly."
"Can you describe her? What are her three sizes?"
"What are your three sizes?"
She lists them off.
…What? You think I'm going to share them with you?
All I'll say is: holy shit.
"Whoa…" I mutter. "This is surreal."
"What is…?" she asks.
"Her measurements are the same as yours. It can't be a coincidence. Do you have dissociative identity disorder? I've never seen the two of you in the same room, so clearly… you're the same person. There's no other explanation."
She punches me on the head. There's blood. I think my brain's melting.
"Why would you drop such a massive spoiler without warning!?" she scolds.
That's what she's mad about?
"Well, duh. Now no one's going to keep reading. Might as well end the volume here. Hell, let's just end the series. Here's our final message to the readers:
'It's been wonderful sharing this story with you. I've lost many things, but in return, I've found what I've always been searching for—the one thing that proves I'm alive. After so much time, I finally found it. There's not much left to say. Through allusions and metaphors, fairy—'
"What the hell was that for!?" Olympia cries out.
"What was what?"
"You just punched the roof of my head, you asshole!"
"I have no idea what you're talking about."
"You're lucky we're never getting an anime adaptation. The animators would expose what a monster you are."
"Shut up. And why the hell are you trying to end the whole series now? Nothing interesting has happened yet. Think about it: the more chapters, the more readers, the more money, the more of whatever you desire."
"Video games?"
Video games. That's all it takes to please her.
"Sure. Video games."
"Hip, hip, hooray!"
Dear God, not another catchphrase.
"Shut up."…How did she know what I was thinking?
"But Kiyomi—seriously. Is it true? Have you really crossed paths with a witch?"
"No."
…Wait. Would Emanon count as a witch? What about Kagami? I wouldn't be surprised if either of them were the one people are talking about. I hope it's not Emanon. The last time I saw her, she gave me a dirty magazine…Wait, did I put that in the previous volume? Forget I said that. Please.
"I didn't get much on what the witch looks like," Olympia says. "My brain sort of…shut off when I heard the word. I think I didn't want to hear the details unless they came from you."
"I see. Well, I doubt I've run into any witches. But if I do, I'll let you know. Deal?"
"Promise?"
She extends her pinkie.
I know what to do.
We make a pinkie promise.
Please consider this a peak moment. If there's ever a Top 5 Peaks post, I hope this makes it to the top two—and isn't number two.
"Look who's finally finished whatever she was doing."
Exiting the school building, looking just as out of place as ever, is the one and only Kumiko Kikunaga.