I woke up drenched in sweat, my head burning with heat. I finally regain the touch of reality
I barely managed to grab my phone—2:39 a.m.
I had been living in an endless illusion.
"Why am I dreaming of this? Why am I creating this illusion?"
"Who am I?"
"Is there truly hope?"
"Am I asking for too much?"
"Can I really keep going?"
"Why am I even trying?"
"What's the point of all of this?"
I sighed, defeated.
"I forgot—I'm not special. I might be good at everything, but I'm not talented at anything. Hard work might make me better, but never the best. I was never someone's favorite. And I never will be.It's okay… because the cost of love is never loving someone again.I accept my fate.Maybe I'm smarter than some people, but that only makes me suffer more.There's nothing right or wrong about it—I just can't do this anymore."
I stared at the ceiling, knowing there were no answers to these questions.
School had two weeks left.
Morning arrived, but my head was still drowning in chaos.
I prepared for school, put my headphones on, and walked the usual route.
With every step, my heart burned with pain.
I arrived early, as always. Standing next to the classroom, I waited for everyone to arrive.
Then, she walked past me with her friend.
And just like that, all the pain vanished.
Inside my mind, everything fell silent and peaceful.
I isolated myself, searching for answers.
The day ended—and still, no answers.
I entered my mind one last time, hopeless.
To my surprise, 356 wasn't there.
Ego finally spoke.
"I've been putting pressure on Heart to give up."
"If we couldn't defeat him from the outside, I tried to make him destroy himself."
"That's why your thoughts became corrupted."
"But… I was powerless under her presence."
Heart still fought back with all of his might.
Every step, every emotion, every moment—it was as if I had already lived it before.
And then came the last day of school.
Everything unfolded exactly as it had in my illusions.
I had lost the link between reality and imagination.
Nothing felt real.
Yet, I kept moving forward.
For the last time, I walked into school.
For the last time, I talked with the same people, in the same way.
For the last time, I left the classroom, searching for answers—and found none.
All day long, inside my mind, Ego and Heart battled.
Even in Sofia's presence, the war continued.
Until—finally—they reached an agreement:
I. I can only try to reach her in indirect ways—directly only under emergency.
II. The only time I can try is after the summer break, or if and only if she reaches out to me first.
III. If I try to reach her before that, Heart will be trapped—his last chance gone forever.
IV. If I confess my feelings, I will lose the chance to ever reach her again—even after 100 years.
V. If Heart attempts to break any of these rules, he will be trapped—but he will still always have one last chance.
The war finally stopped.
I felt reborn.
I knew Heart would never truly give up, but at least now, I could control him.
I reentered the classroom with one thought in mind:
"If I become someone somewhere, will she one day call my name?"
The spring breeze blew, in a busy daily life, only age keeps on growing, even so, still love and be loved, knowing that the fate is to live, life full of regrets, irreparable mistakes, no matter who it is, there will be one or two, this is live, it's really annoying.
Even if I were reincarnated, starting life over again, I would still walk forward—carrying the past, which cannot be shaken off.
I woke up again from my overthinking and for the last time, I let myself get lost in her eyes one more time.
As the day ended, Adam, Nikole, Lewis, Sofia, and her friend walked home together.
Everyone took a longer path, sacrificing time to stay together just a bit longer.
The atmosphere was emotional, but I felt nothing.
That pain had become a drop in an ocean.
Then, the moment came—the final goodbye.
I looked at Sofia, seeing her sadness hidden beneath her beautiful smile.
"Is this really the end?"
Heart screamed:
"No, no! Go after her—NOW!"
But this time, the cost was too great.
Heart was trapped and locked away.
I continued walking with Adam and Nikole.
Nikole sighed.
"Sofia said she'll miss everyone—even you Zak."
Heart cried.
"I still have one last chance."
"I promise—I will do anything to have her."
"Even if I have to give up all of my dreams."
"I promise—I will love her, and only her, for the rest of my existence."