On the second Saturday of November, Severus watched his Snakes chatter excitedly during breakfast. Their first game, Slytherin versus Hufflepuff, was today and there wasn't a student at his table that wasn't sporting green scarves and excited eyes. As civilized and restrained as the Slytherin students usually were, they always upped their energy levels on game days.
When Potter and Draco entered the Hall together the Slytherin table stood and gave them a round of applause. Severus scoffed at the puffed chests and pleased smirks both boys displayed. As if sensing his thoughts, Potter looked up and winked in his direction.
Severus reluctantly felt the edges of his lips curl up in to a small smile. The brat was an arrogant show off.
Severus watched as Potter and Draco sat and both began picking at their meals. Despite their arrogant entrance, he could tell they were needlessly worried. Before he made his way to the Teachers Box in the stands, he stopped by the table and wished each of his players luck.
Flint eagerly assured him they would be winning the Quidditch Cup again. The rest of the players didn't seem to be as confident as Flint, though they all had a stubborn look in their eyes and a determined set to their postures.
"Harry, Draco, good luck this morning," Severus said once he reached their end of the table.
"Thanks," Potter grinned up at him. "Nice weather for it, huh?"
Severus chuckled at Potter's sarcasm. It was a terrible day for a quidditch match. It was windy, raining, and had a high likelihood for lightening. If he were not the Head of Slytherin House there would be nothing that could convince him to go sit outside and watch a match for however long it takes.
"Try and catch the snitch quickly before we all freeze, will you?"
Potter shrugged, "I'll do my best. Suppose I can do it faster that Diggory anyway."
Potter and Draco both sent disdainful looks towards the Hufflepuff table where the students in yellow were crowding around Cedric Diggory, the captain and seeker for their team and fifth year Hufflepuff prefect.
"Of course you can," Bones assured Harry as she slipped a slice of ham on his plate. Severus was amused, yet unsurprised, to see that Bones, Lovegood, Granger, and Longbottom were all sporting green scarves and hats. It was rare for Slytherin to have so many supporters from other houses during their games.
"Do try and stay on your broom this time," Severus told Potter who grimaced at the reminder.
"If I break any bones just make sure nobody but Snape heals them," Potter told his friends severely.
Severus walked out to the stands with his own chest slightly puffed out. Potter trusted him, and him alone, to heal any injuries. While Severus hoped there were no injuries that would require healing today, he couldn't help but be flattered by the child's continued trust in him.
As predicted- the weather was terrible for a quidditch match. Such was the popularity of Quidditch that the whole school turned out to watch the match as usual. Severus watched as the students ran down the lawns toward the Quidditch field, heads bowed against the ferocious wind, umbrellas being whipped out of their hands as they went.
Severus cast a few charms on himself to stay as warm and dry as was possible on a day such as this and silently prayed that Potter would end the match quickly. The sooner he caught the snitch, the less Pepper-Up Potions Severus would have to restock this evening.
Severus clapped alongside Pomona as their opposing teams entered the field. The wind was so strong that they staggered sideways as they walked out onto the field.
"Wager on the game?" Pomona asked as Flint and Diggory shook hands.
Severus thought back to Potter's manicenergetic practice over the summer (for he was not entirely convinced the Muggle Healer had been correct in his diagnosis).
"10 galleons that Potter catches the snitch," he said.
Pomona laughed, "Not that Slytherin wins, just that Potter catches the snitch?"
Severus hummed. He watched the foolish child break his arm three times in a row while practicing- Potter would catch the snitch.
"That's fine, I have complete confidence in Mister Diggory," Pomona said with a proud smile.
"Deal," Severus murmured, his eyes sharp on his rising players. Potter immediately shot up high in the sky, his broom shaking slightly from the rough winds. Severus grit his teeth to see all fourteen students soaked to the bone by the time five uneventful minutes had passed.
He could tell that Potter and one of the chasers for Hufflepuff were both having additional difficulties due to their glasses.
"Make them impenetrable you ridiculous boy," Severus muttered under his breath as Potter swerved to avoid Pucey. Thankfully, once again as if Potter were reading his mind, Severus watched as Potter plucked his glasses off his face before replacing them and flying much steadier.
"Harry's got quite the hang of magic, doesn't he?" Minerva chuckled beside him.
Since Minerva once took points from the child for not using a wand in her class, Severus did not dignify her statement with a verbal response. He clapped as Draco scored the fifth goal of the game, putting Slytherin up by fifty points, when the first strike of lightening hit and Flint called for a timeout.
Full of fresh determination after the timeout, Severus watched as his students urged their brooms through the turbulent air. Potter was staring in every direction for the Snitch, avoiding a Bludger, ducking beneath Diggory, who was streaking in the opposite direction.
There was another clap of thunder, followed immediately by forked lightning. This was getting more and more dangerous. Severus had his hands clenched tightly around his wand as he watched his ward and his godson both carefully.
Potter may be a magical prodigy, but neither boy would survive being struck by literal lightening.
Severus saw Potter freeze as another flash of lightening illuminated the stands opposite Severus. He squinted to make out Potter's facial expression and saw that the child looked amused by whatever he saw on the stands across from him.
"Turn you fool, turn," Severus hissed, seeing Diggory suddenly zero in on a location between the two boys.
"C'mon Potter," he murmured, his eyes straining as he kept them glued to his ward who had finally turned and was now flying fiercely towards where Severus assumed the snitch was located. "C'mon, c'mon..."
"Severus," Pomona gasped suddenly, clutching Severus' arm tightly.
"Wha- son of a bitch. ALBUS STOP THEM!"
Severus had looked down at Pomona's grasp and saw that the field had filled with dementors and... and...
Potter was falling.
"Impedimenta," he flicked his wand in Potter's direction and his chest tightened once he realized the child was too far away for the spell to reach.
"Expecto Patronum!" Severus yelled with no effect, his eyes on his rapidly falling ward. "Expecto Patronum!"
Nothing.
Severus fled down the stairs, desperately trying to reach the field before Potter crashed in to the crowd of at least a hundred dementors who were already rising towards him. Severus could hear the shouts of the other professors calling upon their patronuses, could feel Albus' fury behind him, and heard the terrified shrieks of the students as he ran.
You'll never make it.
He'll die.
A great silver Phoenix flew past Severus and scattered the dementors on the field. It was closely followed by Minerva's cat and Pomona's chipmunk.
"Impedimenta," Severus cried, his wand pointed at Harry's falling body.
He was close enough that the spell connected, but Harry was too close to the ground...
CRASH
Severus skidded to a halt where Potter landed not twenty feet away from him.
"Potter, Potter, Harry, wake up, wake up," he muttered frantically as he flipped him on to his back. He listened and heard raspy breaths coming from Potter's mouth and felt the tightness in his chest loosen an infinitesimal amount.
Alive.
"Hospital Wing," Albus said from behind him conjuring a stretcher for Potter. "Go Severus."
Severus gave him an absently thankful nod as he levitated the stretcher towards the castle as quickly as he could.
He only idly recognized that it was Miss Bones, pale faced and tear streaked, that threw the entrance door open for him before she sprinted up the stairs to open the Hospital Wing doors as well.
"POPPY!" Severus yelled, all sense of decorum gone as the harsh lights of the Wing highlighted how pale Potter was.
"Severus what- bed one, now!"
Severus levitated Potter to the first bed and stepped back to allow Poppy to do her job. He kept his eyes on Potter and tightened his fists until he could feel his nails cutting in to his palms.
"What happened?" Poppy demanded as she began murmuring diagnostic spells.
"Dementors," Severus said immediately. "At least a hundred of them. They came on the field and Potter fainted. I- I was too far to slow him down in time. I wasn't able to slow his descent until he was a mere twenty feet from the ground. And he- he," Severus swallowed harshly. "He hit the ground Poppy," he whispered in a choked voice that he couldn't bother to mask. "Tell me what to do."
Poppy spared him half a glance before returning her attention to Potter.
"Stay back," she said, harshly but not unkindly. "You're no help to me right now."
'If I break any bones just make sure nobody but Snape heals them.'
"If there are any breaks I will fix them," he said hoarsely as he took half a step back. "It's important."
Poppy nodded as she continued to work. Severus stood stock still as he watched until he felt a small and warm hand slip in to his right hand. He glanced down and saw that Miss Bones was now clutching his hand as if a lifeline in a storm. Her eyes overflowed with tears silently as she kept them firmly fixed on Potter.
"He'll be okay," Severus said softly. "He'll be fine."
Bones ignored his empty platitudes as easily as he himself would have.
Poppy glanced behind her and shook her head as she returned her focus to Potter.
"Miss Bones you'll need to wait in the-"
"She stays," Severus said shortly.
The two stood there in silence after that. Severus kept his eye on every spell Poppy used, acknowledging the injury needed for the spell to be used.
Traumatic brain injury. Spinal cord repair.
Abdominal repair.
Concussion.
Severus flicked his wand in his left hand and offered Poppy the blood replenisher he summoned from her store as soon as he recognized the spell for internal bleeding.
"I think that's that aside from the breaks," she said as she spelled the thick red liquid directly in to Potter's stomach.
"Snape does the breaks," Bones whispered. "He said only Snape."
"I know, I told her," Severus assured her. He flicked his wand again and summoned a Calming Drought. Bones sounded calm but she was beginning to tremble and Severus worried that between the weather, the presence of the dementors, the emotional upheaval she went through, and the physical exertion of crying that Bones would be in shock herself if he didn't nip it in the bud.
It was a mark of how much trust Severus must have earned from the little badger that she accepted the lavender vial and drank it without a single pause.
"Severus whenever you're ready," Poppy said.
Severus inhaled and exhaled slowly as he counted to ten multiple times and cleared his mind.
"What all is broken?" he asked with a final reassuring squeeze to Bones' hand before stepping forward.
"Left femur, left wrist, bilateral collarbones, and a skull fracture," Poppy said.
One... two... three...
Severus counted to ten slowly once more before he began healing the breaks.
"Brackium Emendo," he said with a gentle tap on Potter's leg. He continued the process before he took a deep breath and finished with the skull fracture.
"I'm going to revive him now," Poppy said. "He might not immediately wake up though. That concussion was nasty."
Severus nodded and conjured two chairs.
"Sit, Bones," he said with a guiding hand on the young witches shoulder.
They sat on either side of Potter's bed as Poppy tapped his chest, "Rennervate."
"Call for me when he wakes," Poppy said with a final kind smile towards the two of them.
Bones immediately grasped Potter's hand beside her and began whispering to him.
"Wake up Harry, you're at Hogwarts. You're okay now. Snape fixed it. Wake up please."
Severus did not grasp Potter's hand, sure the child would not appreciate it once he woke, and instead studied his ward as Miss Bones whispered to him. He watched as Potter's chest rose and fell in deep even counts. He watched as Potter's face began regaining color. And he watched as his lips started moving.
"Stop," he murmured so softly it was almost indiscernible. "Please. Stop."
"Harry, Harry, it's okay, wake up," Bones whispered directly in Potter's ear. "You're not there, you're here. At Hogwarts. With me, Susan, and Snape."
Potter's lashes fluttered as Bones continued to reassure him in soft whispers.
"S-Susan?" he croaked. "Where am I?"
Severus snagged his glasses off the nightstand and slid them on his face, careful not to make contact with his skin.
"You're in the Hospital," Severus said gently. "You... fell... during your Quidditch match."
"Snape?" Potter tried to sit up as his eyes frantically flicked around the room.
"You're quite safe," Severus said as he flicked his wand beneath the bed to summon another Calming Drought. "Here," he placed the vial in Potter's open hand. "Sit back and drink."
Potter's hand shook terribly as he held the vial up before abruptly putting it on the nightstand.
"I d-don't know how I got here," he said as his respiratory rate increased and he frantically looked around the room.
"Harry," Bones climbed on the edge of the bed and put a hand on either side of Potter's face. "Hey- it's me."
Potter was taking shallow and shaking breaths as he focused his eyes on Bones.
"You fell off your broom. The dementors were on the field and made you fall. Snape tried to slow you down but you still hit the ground. He levitated you to the Hospital Wing. I've been here the whole time. Snape fixed the breaks and you're okay now."
"Match Susan's breathing Harry," Severus said calmly. "Inhale as she does. One... two... three... four... hold it now just as she does. Two... three... Excellent, exhale for two... three... Very good. Again now."
Severus talked Bones through the breathing and Potter kept his eyes latched on hers as he copied it for three cycles.
"Harry, where are you?" Severus asked softly.
Potter attempted to flick his eyes around again but Bones kept her hands firmly on his face.
"Where are you?" she whispered.
"Hogwarts," Potter said in a hoarse voice. "'M at Hogwarts."
"Very good," Severus said. "Will you drink this Calming Drought?"
Bones grabbed the vial from Severus' hand and held it up to Potter's mouth.
"Drink," she said.
To Severus' never ending shock- he did.
'I'm his best friend. Harry trusts me the most.'
Miss Bones' confidence in Potter's trust in her was clearly not undeserved.
Potter immediately slumped back in his pillows as the Drought worked its way through his system.
"Draco okay?" he asked Bones.
"He's fine," she reassured him, sliding off the bed and back in to her chair. "You were the only one hurt."
"Brill," Potter sighed. "We lose?"
"You lived," Severus said. "I have no idea the results of the game."
"Be right back," Bones said before running to the Hospital door. Severus craned his neck and saw that it looked as if there were nearly twenty students standing outside the doors. Mostly Slytherins from what he could see- though Miss Lovegoods platinum hair was distinguishable as well. Severus could not hear what Bones asked, though he could make out half a dozen voices answering her as they overlapped one another.
"No visitors," Bones said loudly before closing the door in the anxious students' faces.
She came back with a tightening around her eyes and something held behind her back.
"Feeling okay?" she asked.
"We lost, didn't we?" Potter asked with a dejected slump to his shoulders.
"Diggory caught the snitch right as you fell," Bones said softly. "They said he called for a rematch but Hooch said it was a fair grab."
Potter scoffed weakly but didn't dispute it.
"The bad news all at once or save it for later?" Bones said hesitantly.
Severus turned his head to see what she had behind her back. It looked like a bag with something brown inside of it.
He was puzzling it out as Potter said he wanted to know the rest of the news.
Bones said it just as the mysterious contents of the bag clicked in Severus' mind.
"I'm sorry, your broom flew in to the Whomping Willow," Bones said quietly offering Potter the bag. "It destroyed it Harry."
Potter gaped at the twigs that scattered across his bed as he upended the bag.
"But- but it was mine," he said softly. "Draco gave it to me."
"We can buy a new one Harry," Severus said quickly. "We can order it over break, okay?"
Potter nodded but Severus got the distinct impression he didn't hear what Severus said. He continued staring down at the broomstick as his eyes became misty.
"Susan... can you- will you-" Potter struggled to finish his thought. Thankfully, Miss Bones apparently was able to interpret what she believed he wanted.
"I'll just go check on everyone, okay? We'll come see you later tonight. I'll get Mavis to bake some tarts."
Potter nodded and Bones gave Severus a solemn look as she quickly left them alone in the Wing.
"It was mine," Potter said softly before he buried his face in his knees and his shoulders began heaving with the force of the sobs he was attempting to withhold.
"It's alright," Severus murmured as he gently laid his hand on Potter's back. "It's alright Harry, we'll replace it."
"C-can't you g-get rid of them?" Potter wailed as he turned his body towards Severus and put his face in the crook of Severus' shoulder.
Severus didn't need a further explanation.
He should have immediately known that the broom, while a devastating blow to the child who once owned nothing, was just the trigger to the delayed effects of over one hundred dementors tearing at Potter's emotions and memories.
"I don't know," Severus said helplessly as Potter cried in his shoulder. "I'm sorry."
Potter asked for nothing.
Ever.
And now he asks for the one thing that Severus has no control over.
God damn you Sirius Black, he cursed in his mind.
If it were not for Black then the dementors would not be here tearing Potter to pieces.
"I h-hate them," Potter wailed pitifully. "Every t-time I was so d-damn w-weak, they bring up."
"I know, I know," Severus said as softly as he could. He placed his hand on Potter's back and attempted to rub it in the soothing way that his own mother used to do for him as a child. "They won't be here forever. You're doing so well Harry."
Potter clutched him tightly and fisted his hands in Severus' robes as he cried. Severus rubbed his back and stroked his hair and whispered comforting sentiments to him. Due to the storm darkened sky, he truly had no idea how much time had passed as he sat there holding the weeping teen.
At one point Poppy appeared, then quickly ducked back in her office once the scene in front of her registered.
Miss Bones eventually opened the door slowly when Potter's cries were tapering down. She met Severus' eyes and gave him a sad smile before pulling the door closed as she left. If Severus strained his ears he could just make out her telling the other children that Potter was asleep and they would return the next morning.
Potter's cries finally turned into ineligible whimpers as his fists unclenched and he sagged against Severus' chest.
Severus gently laid him on the bed and smoothed his tear and sweat soaked hair away from his forehead.
"Sleep child," he murmured as he rearranged his chair closer to Potter's bed. "We will figure this out tomorrow."
***
Once Potter was released from the Hospital Wing the next afternoon, Severus kept a careful eye on him. He picked at his dinner and kept his chin propped up on one hand. Severus could see the other children chattering to him and they all continuously flicked their eyes Severus' direction with worried looks as Potter refused to respond.
"Is Harry alright?" Lupin asked quietly. "I heard he had a nasty fall during the match yesterday."
"He is unwell," Severus said curtly, his eyes on Potter. "I am handling it."
"If you need help you-"
"I don't."
Severus caught Miss Lovegoods eyes and jerked his chin minutely towards the Hall doors. He exited towards the teachers entrance and met Lovegood by the main entrance.
"Miss Lovegood, I need to meet with the Headmaster. I will personally ensure that none of you are given detention if you could take your group to the Slytherin common room tonight and stay with Potter."
"Of course Professor," Lovegood said softly. "Harry's not well, he needs people who care about him with him."
She suddenly lifted her eyes and met Severus' square on. Her glazed silver eyes were sharp and focused as she stared in to his.
"You see the problem, but you can't find the answer," she said in a rougher tone than Severus was used to hearing from her. "You won't find the answer. Not alone. All three of you need help. One of you can't get results without the others. You see it, don't you?"
Before Severus could respond, Lovegood blinked and offered him a soft smile as her eyes resumed their previously dreamy appearance.
"I'll just let everyone know we're having a sleepover again," she hummed. "Good luck Professor Snape."
Severus blinked at the spot Lovegood had been before mentally shaking himself and heading towards Albus' office.
As fond of Lovegood as he was, Severus could only handle one problem at a time and protesting the presence of the dementors took priority over her convoluted riddle.
"Mother fucking god damned son of a bitch," Severus snarled as he cleared the belongings on his desk off with one vicious swipe.
He had appealed to Albus who agreed immediately with Severus' position.
'The dementors are drawing the joy out of all our students,' he'd said wearily. 'But with Black on the loose and already making an appearance here, parents believe their children are safer with their presence. This was set up by the Ministry, my boy, I'm afraid that Cornelius is the only one with the power to reverse the decision.'
Severus thanked Potter and Lucius for their never ending political ambitions as he remembered that he was on a first name basis with the Minister.
'They nearly killed Harry,' he told Fudge in his floo. 'There has to be a better way to protect the students.'
The Minister had never looked so weak and pathetic as he did as he fidgeted with his bowler hat and hemmed and hawed.
'Parents will pull their students from Hogwarts if we yank the dementors. I can't tell you how sorry I am about Harry getting hurt, tell the lad that I said that, but it's better than Black getting his hands on him, isn't it?'
At this rate Severus didn't know which was a worse scenario.
He was beginning to lean towards Black as the lesser of the two evils. Potter couldn't fight the draining effects of the dementors. And Severus has complete faith that the child could kill Black with nothing more than his hands.
***
Severus watched for weeks as Potter drug himself to classes. He watched as Potter sat listlessly and silent at the Slytherin table during meals. He saw Draco taking over potions during class as Potter's hands trembled so hard Severus was worried he was going to cut himself chopping ingredients.
Severus sent Mavis with Dreamless Sleep and snacks to the Slytherin dorms in the evenings.
"Master Potter is sleeping," Mavis cried shrilly. "But Master says he is still tired."
Severus fielded hesitant complaints about impropriety by Miss Owens.
"Sir, I don't want to speak badly of Potter but... but I think he's got female students from other houses sleeping in his dorm."
Severus informed Miss Bones and Lovegood to either be more diligent or utilize Potter's invisibility cloak.
He listened to concerned remarks from his colleagues.
"Is Harry sleeping?" Minerva asked during lunch one afternoon. "He looks terrible," she said bluntly.
"He is ill," Severus said. "And the damn dementors are making it worse."
Which was quite true. Severus set Lucius on digging up any and all research regarding the short and long term effects of dementors on a persons mind and compared it to the Muggle research on psychology he had.
Dementors fed off of human happiness- like emotional leeches. They left only feelings of depression and despair in their hosts. Hosts with minimal trauma were largely unaffected by the aura the dementors exuded that drove these feelings of depression. People such as Potter though, who had pre-existing trauma and depression, were affected much harder as those chronic feelings were brought to the forefront and exacerbated.
Severus considered pulling Potter from Hogwarts altogether. The Contessa, who wrote weekly inquiring on Blaise and Potter's well-being, would be more than happy to take Potter to France with her.
But Severus worried as Potter continued his listless behavior that sending him away from his friends, his support, and out of Severus' watchful eye would push the child in to something drastic.
He tried multiple times to sit Potter down to speak with him but each time he was fed a new excuse.
'I don't feel good.'
'Classes are tiring me out.'
'The castle is cold.'
'I'm just tired.'
All Severus could do for weeks was helplessly watch as Potter fought through the haze that seemed to follow him like a dark cloud.
Through it all Severus had a terrible and consistent thought niggling in the back of his mind.
He was the single most incompetent guardian in the world.
The Mind Healer did not misdiagnose Potter, Severus just naively wrote it off during Potter's period of stability.
And now it was back and creating turmoil in his ward in a way that Severus truly could not have foreseen.
If there was a worse guardian alive, Severus had never known them.