Chapter 3
The doors of the Brine Research Laboratory creaked open.
Penelope Pickleton stepped outside for the first time since the explosion.
Well...
"Stepped" might not be the right word.
At the moment, she was still shaped like a full pickle.
Which meant she mostly rolled forward awkwardly down the steps.
Behind her, Chippy the potato chip waddled proudly like this was the most normal day of his life.
Snackopolis stretched out before them.
Bright neon restaurant signs.
Burger stands.
Food trucks.
Crowded sidewalks.
And now...
A living pickle in the middle of it all.
Penelope froze halfway down the steps.
"Okay," she said quietly.
"New problem."
Chippy leaned against the railing.
"Which one?"
Penelope gestured at herself.
"I'm a pickle."
"Yes."
"I don't have arms."
"Correct."
"I don't have legs."
"Also correct."
Penelope slowly rolled in a circle.
"How am I supposed to live like this?"
Chippy shrugged.
"You could join a salad."
Penelope glared at him.
"Not helping."
People walking down the sidewalk began slowing down.
A teenager pointed.
"Uh... guys?"
Another person squinted.
"Is that... a pickle?"
Penelope panicked.
"Oh no."
Chippy looked around.
"Yeah, they're noticing."
A little kid ran closer.
"Mommy! The pickle is alive!"
Penelope tried to wave.
But she remembered something.
"I CAN'T WAVE!"
Chippy rubbed his chin thoughtfully.
"You know... something weird is happening."
Penelope blinked.
"Everything is weird!"
"No I mean biologically weird."
Penelope stopped rolling.
"What do you mean?"
Chippy pointed at her side.
Penelope looked down.
The green surface of her pickle body was... moving.
Very slightly.
Like something was shifting under the skin.
Penelope froze.
"Chippy."
"Yeah?"
"...My pickle is moving."
Chippy leaned closer.
"Oh."
"Oh??"
"Yeah that looks important."
The bump on her side suddenly stretched outward.
Penelope gasped.
"WHAT IS HAPPENING?!"
The bump grew longer.
Then split.
Then—
POP.
A small green arm burst out.
Both of them stared.
Silence.
Penelope slowly moved the arm.
The fingers wiggled.
"...I have a hand."
Chippy clapped.
"Congratulations!"
Penelope stared at the arm.
"THAT WAS NOT THERE FIVE SECONDS AGO."
Another bump appeared on her other side.
Penelope's eyes widened.
"Oh no."
POP.
Second arm.
Penelope flailed both of them wildly.
"I HAVE TWO HANDS!"
People on the sidewalk screamed.
"THE PICKLE GREW ARMS!"
Someone dropped their coffee.
A reporter from a nearby news van gasped.
"ARE WE FILMING THIS?!"
Penelope looked down again.
"Oh no."
Two new bumps were forming near the bottom of her body.
Chippy leaned closer again.
"...Those are legs."
Penelope shrieked.
"I DON'T KNOW HOW TO USE LEGS!"
POP.
One leg stretched outward.
Then the second.
Suddenly the pickle tipped sideways.
Penelope fell onto the sidewalk.
"Ow!"
Chippy helped her sit upright.
"Well."
He looked impressed.
"You're officially less vegetable."
Penelope stared at her legs.
Green.
Pickle-textured.
But definitely legs.
"...Okay."
She slowly stood up.
Wobbly.
Very wobbly.
Her balance shifted back and forth.
"I feel like a newborn giraffe."
Chippy nodded.
"Very accurate description."
Penelope took a step.
Then another.
Her brain struggled to understand the movement.
But her body somehow knew what to do.
She walked.
Slowly.
But she walked.
"...I'm walking."
Chippy applauded dramatically.
"Ladies and gentlemen, the pickle walks!"
The crowd gasped.
Phones appeared everywhere.
"THE PICKLE IS WALKING!"
Penelope covered her face.
"This is humiliating."
Chippy grinned.
"This is incredible."
Penelope stretched her arms.
Then bent her knees.
Her muscles felt... powerful.
Stronger than before.
She jumped slightly.
And launched ten feet into the air.
"AAAAAA!"
She landed on a parked car.
The roof dented instantly.
Penelope stared at the damage.
"...Oops."
Chippy looked amazed.
"You might be a superhero."
Penelope looked at her hands again.
Then her legs.
Then the street.
"Or a public safety hazard."
Suddenly—
BOOM.
A massive explosion echoed down the street.
Everyone turned.
Smoke rose from the next block.
People started running.
"WHAT IS THAT?!"
"RUN!"
Penelope frowned.
"What now?"
A giant metal machine rolled into view.
It looked like a massive salt shaker.
Standing inside the glass cockpit was a man in a lab coat shouting dramatically.
"I AM DR. SODIUM!"
He fired a cannon.
Salt blasted across the road.
Cars rusted instantly.
Streetlights corroded.
People screamed.
Chippy leaned toward Penelope.
"Well."
Penelope sighed.
"Of course."
Dr. Sodium spotted her.
His eyes widened.
"A PICKLE?!"
Penelope waved awkwardly with her new arm.
"...Hi."
Dr. Sodium laughed maniacally.
"PERFECT!"
Penelope groaned.
"Why does everyone say that?"