Acting is War; don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
It was the first lesson I learned the moment I started yearning for an acting career.
My fingers moved towards the bridge of my nose; my eyes were unsure of where to look. An hour, maybe longer, that's how long I've stayed in this decrepit theatre.
Audition ended nearly a while ago, the ink crossing my name on the paper has yet to dry.
[Candidate: Kima Rhyze]
Moments earlier, there were several people celebrating the roles they received; some started drinking soon after.
I'd be lying if I didn't say I felt stupid for staying despite not being part of the cast.
To be fair, I'd understand why; It was a rare occurrence in this slum town since the era of magic. Albeit the venue is small, barely big enough to fit around 200 or so people, people would still get excited at the opportunity.
My eyes flutter towards the empty stage, the light still fixated on the apron.
If my life were a script, I would play it to my heart's content…except it's still hard to accept that moments ago, my dreams of being an actor were stripped away.
I've always loved acting. It was the one thing that remained constant in my life. But as much as I yearned for it, fate had other plans for me.
A hand shot itself towards me, signalling me to come down. It was the cleaner visibly annoyed, maybe for working overtime.
From a distance, it looked like he was sneering at me.
I straightened slowly, needles pierced my legs for sitting too long. My frail body made its way down the aisle, moving towards the exit. Each step felt like I was getting closer towards the stage.
Despite fate wanting me otherwise, it was something that I couldn't simply let go. 10 years of my life was wanting it and nearly more so dedicated to it. It was the only skill I could truly call my own.
My legs felt glued right before the stage.
It was senseless, I know, but if it were the last time I would be close to that light… I instinctively reached out towards it–the light gleaming just shy away from me.
"You know, that there's stairs a few steps away from you."
My body quickly turns to see a young man, sitting along the front row seats.
"I mean, if you wanted to get up that stage that badly, no one's stopping you."
I quickly regained my composure.
"No, that wasn't my intention to."
My flustered face made itself apparent.
Looking closely, he was one of the boys celebrating earlier. Oddly enough, I remember him enough to realize that he was one of the few standing to the side while others enjoyed themselves.
He might've mistaken me as one of the people who was chosen and decided to stay behind like him.
"What are you doing here? Isn't everyone supposed to have left earlier?"
"I suppose I could ask you the same thing."
"I was waiting for the blizzard to die down before heading out"
"Then that's also the same reason I have."
His snarky attitude irritates me. I'd rather be caught dead than indulge him and his boredom.
My eyebrows couldn't hold itself back to furrow while maintaining my polite smile.
A few minutes had passed. The flaps of the winds gurgling towards the wide curtains on the side prompted me to leave. But as much as I wanted to, nothing awaits me outside those snowy doors…but it was my version of reality.
I mustered up the courage to move but before I could, a voice echoed throughout the room.
"They were amazing weren't they?". I couldn't tell his seriousness
"Yeah, they were." My eyes spare an empty gaze towards him.
"I mean to call them that had to be an understatement. They were geniuses; to move along each step as if it was second nature–it seemed surreal." His body seemed agitated, almost restless.
"I mean, it is a rare opportunity after all."
I'd be lying if I said that I didn't feel a twinge of envy poking towards my chest.
"They tend to react that way. They're a bunch of plebs–reacting in such a way even after getting what they want. It's a little disheartening."
…
The angle of the light made his face seem more dim.
"I hear the director was from the nearby town as well." His face couldn't hold back a condescending smile.
"Yeah, there were rumors about him coming here too?"
"Rumors? I just heard he wanted better talents to work with."
"He said something like 'bringing light in this dimly-lit world'. Ha! Of course, it was a load of crap. I heard he was fired for being too rough on one of his actors. He was actually a renowned producer trying to come back."
His hands couldn't help express themselves in the air.
"I see. "
"A person like you should know people don't go into this town willingly–it's a place where dreams fizzle out. Either that or wait patiently for you to."
It wasn't uncommon for things like that in this town.
Nevertheless, I hated it.
The light seemed to flicker from the harsh winds outside. His arms unfolded from his curdled position, his body seemed bored of a lot of everything.
"Frankly, as far as this town is concerned, it's amazing really. To think that people here could still think like that."
My heart felt like it simmered without my consent. I unconsciously bit my tongue before I could say anything else. At the corner of my eye, I notice his flushed cheeks raising themselves a silently.
"These people, these dreams, it really wouldn't really matter–especially not for people like who don't have an ounce of self resp-
"What could you possibly be wrong about wanting?"
His mocking eyes seemed to snap back to reality.
Maybe it was his voice, or the way he was conceited, but I just couldn't handle him anymore. These people he's describing–they're like me.
"You say that they risk themselves, but that's what makes them who they are."
"You can't be serious with that. Things don't become reality by just ideology–its gift–it's fate."
Perhaps it was my frustration. A thousand years wasted in this thing that I loved–and more in trying to achieve it.
I tried to keep it in, but it gnawed at me.
"That's what idiots like you don't understand… These ideals that made them who they are."
I hated it.
"Just because there's people like you."
How gifted they are–how years of my effort would never surmount them.
"In hells like these, it's where people like them thrive, it's where people like me survive!"
About how unfair it seemed, how people like him were the favorites.
"So shut your mouth, and we'll give you an act you can never refuse!"
A blank silence filled the air. My lungs felt exhausted while my cheeks remained flush but despite it, I stood by my point. These damned geniuses were my natural enemy.
His face seemed flustered. Despite this, I couldn't help think… that he felt satisfied
"You would know-"
The brightly lit lights seemed to flicker.
Suddenly, a cloud of grey smoke seeped through the cracks of the building. It was followed by a large bang outside the building. Before I could react, a loud, blaring noise rang like sirens.
[THERE IS AN OUTBREAK NEARBY. PROCEED TO THE NEAREST EVACUATION CENTER]
The cheers quickly turned into screams running across the streets.
"Run the other way!"
"It's there! It's over there!"
"Mommy, where are you?"
A familiar hand called out towards me. Her eyes remained in a state of panic; it was the cleaning lady from earlier.
"Hey kid, get ready to leave here!"
The ground started moving; enough to make the theatre to shake. The lights were thrown off their places while the chairs rattled harshly against each other. It seemed like going outside was a better choice than this.
My eyes turned towards him only to realize that I was alone.
"That damned coward leaving befo-"
A loud crash hit the side of the building–enough to make my surroundings collapse. For a brief moment, it felt like my feet were lifted from the ground until my side was thrown into the audience seats.
The world's movement was too fast, but my mind couldn't keep up; the blood quickly made itself into my head.
The smoke of the debris made my lungs burn, but it was the least of my worries. Soon, my vision seemed to blacken, and it felt like I was going to pass out.
Is it really going to end like this…?
[Dreams are amazing, truly.]
…What?
[but we don't win battles with thoughts. ]
What is this?
[Whatever, stupidity, naivety–it's all the same. One day you'll understand it too. I was like you after all.
The wall cracked against my back–I could barely see everything that had fallen. With the little vision I had left, everything was burning like hell.
I laid against the wall, barely able to see everything that had fallen. Sparks flashed among the loose wires while the walls tore like whirlwinds.
In seconds, my surroundings turned into a jungle.
I wasn't any better.
My body instinctively twitched from the pain. The blood danced its way down towards the ground. It felt painful to move, let alone to move, nevertheless I had to try.
I tried moving my legs; it felt numb.
My eyes crept its way towards the bottom part of my body…only for my gaze to be met with a realization. The chunk part of the ceiling had ripped my right limb away from me.
Please.
My lungs felt submerged inside the depths of water–pressure swallowed my throat.
Please, not this.
My hope, my everything, it felt like the little string I had left was slowly burning with my surroundings. There it was, it looked at me across the room, as if it were saying goodbye.
I'd gone through hell, but I kept it intact…please…why did the world want to see me dissected so badly? My fingers bled from the amount of strength I pushed towards the rocks, yet it didn't move an inch.
The sound of rocks fell from the rubble.
Seconds later, growling began to echo throughout the broken-down theatre. I could barely see them–their movements danced along the darkness–too quickly for me to see.
I struggled harder, but it was no use. Even if I did, would it matter? I would still spend the rest of my life as a cripple. Maybe this is what they'd meant by my life flashing before me; when I'd escaped home; how I lived in the streets; the first act I saw. To think that this is how it would be ending.
The movements seemed to stop. Deep in the darkness, bright red eyes glared towards me. Perhaps, they realized I was prey–and they were playing with me before…
The moonlight, climbing higher by the second, slowly exposed the beasts. There was no mistaking it, it was a pack of otherworldly wolves.
Their bodies seemed twice my size–their eyes filled feral with madness while their mouths spilt uncontrollably. As much as it was hungry for me, it looked like it was cackling.
Was it that funny? Their widened smiles seemed to crave me–moving closer as I could feel my consciousness slipping.
A hand gripped my heart. I couldn't tell if it was fear or anger, but nevertheless I want to escape this hell.
Even though my eyes grew weary, my hands couldn't help tighten towards the ground. Fuck this.
Before I could react, a white light appeared in front of me.
[You are invited by the World's Greatest Act. Accept [y/n]? ]
Huh?
[You are given the chance to be his___. You are advised to say yes]
Was it talking to me?
My eyes flicked towards the bright window in front of me; I couldn't tell if this was still part of the experience of death or my own delusion.
The wolves seemed to be fixated on me, their smile now gone. I was running out of time.
Screw it–whatever this is is better than death.
My arms screamed out as I instinctively reached towards what would ultimately define my life.