"Will you be my woman?"
I read it again, hoping I wasn't making it up in my mind, but hell no, I wasn't. I knew we had the connection, but I wasn't expecting him to ask me out now or ever.
Probably I was the only one who took the friend zone thing serious even I wished someday it would end.
I quickly replied in order not to be rude."Are you trying to pull my legs?"
I was excited, but I had already built this wall in my heart and I wasn't sure I was going to love him as I should, that's if it gets to the relationship stage.
He knew so many things about me, and I think I did the same.
I didn't want to ruin our beautiful friendship with something romantic.
My phone buzzed again, and I guess it's at this point I knew where we stand. Saying no would mean our friendship would never be the same, and saying yes means our friendship would be on another level.
"I'm serious. I guess I waited long enough to do this, but right now I can't hold it anymore."
My heart was beating so fast, and I could swear he could feel it through the phone. I held my phone tighter, staring at the screen like it was a dream.
"I'm still finding it hard to believe that you're saying this. I shouldn't be doubting you, but this is so unreal to me. We were basically talking casually just now, or could this be from the pictures I just sent to you?"
I just wanted to be sure. Leon sounded so serious and I didn't even know how to react, but one thing I knew was that I wasn't sad or angry at him for telling me how he truly felt.
"It's not just about the picture, it's you. I want you, and I want us to be together. I don't think I can handle you being with someone other than me right now. I've always wanted to do this, but we both weren't in a situation to do this."
I was already blushing, but no, I can't do this now.
I wasn't ready just yet and I didn't even know how to politely turn him down without hurting him or our friendship. And from what I knew, he was still in a relationship, and I'm not going to be just another woman.
"But I don't remember you mentioning ending your relationship. I know it's been a couple of months already and you haven't said anything about it. You know I don't double date."
I had to lay down my fears just in case I end up considering saying yes.
There was a short pause before he replied, like he was choosing his words carefully.
"I don't want to lie to you. We've been completely honest with each other ever since we met, so I wouldn't let this be something that gets in-between us. We've not broken up, but the vibe is dead already and we barely speak. Sometimes it's weeks and then months, and I don't think it's a relationship if I'm the only one trying to keep it in place. I don't want this to be the reason I lose a good woman like you."
I didn't know what to reply. I loved his honesty, but I have to look out for myself too. I've been hurt before, and I wasn't about to jump into something messy.
"I really don't know what to say right now. I don't want us starting something that isn't going to work. What if you guys get back together or your feelings for her grow again, and I might just end up being the other woman and you cheated on her with me?"
If I'm going to consider dating him, or if this relationship was going to work, then I have to start saying what I truly feel.
"With what happened, I promise you that you have nothing to worry about. I just don't know how to end the relationship or say it the right way, but I know it's definitely ending. And right now, I can't watch you be with someone else again."I froze.
"Again?"
That part hit me differently. I didn't expect it. I knew we had all the connection, but what does he mean by that?
"Yes, again. I had these feelings all along, but I didn't want to ruin our friendship, and I couldn't bring myself to double date. I'm not that kind of person. I had to maintain our vibes and not hurt anyone in the process of getting what I want. I always wanted to do this, but I thought I had time after my heart got broken. But the moment you told me about Micheal and you were really excited,I knew I had no chance with you anymore. Now it feels like we're all we have, and I don't want someone else having you while I watch, knowing I had an opportunity to have you all to myself."
I swallowed hard, my chest feeling heavy. I knew everything he was saying was nothing but the truth, but I don't know why I was trying to fight it.
It's nothing new that he felt the same, but I wasn't seeing myself moving on this fast. I didn't see us being in this situation right now or ever.
I might just play a little bit of hard to get or probably talk to my buddies. Because honestly, I needed advice at this point.
"I'm still trying to believe you, but I can't make a decision right now. You sound so convincing already, and I can't deny the fact that I understand all these feelings you are having right now, but give me a little bit of time to think things through."
My love life was starting to look like from best friends to lovers. I didn't want to lose my friend, but still, I didn't want to lose someone that would make me truly happy.
"Take all the time you need. I'll be here always."
Leon has always been the sweet gentleman. I guess that's what I love most about him.
It was almost midnight, so we quickly said our goodnight.
As soon as I dropped my phone, I smiled to myself and quickly marked the date on my calendar, 18th July. That's a perfect date to be asked out by a man I've loved all along.
I might just play a little hard to get.
And somehow, I just knew this was the start of a love that would last a lifetime.