I want to ask him what he meant, but I've been standing under the sun for almost five full minutes, which means I'm already red, hot and bothered, so I explain him how much the sun hates me, because it's definitely the sun the one that's affecting me, it's has nothing to do with farmboy here.
I invite him inside for coffee or something, if there is something.
If I'm being honest, I don't want to go inside alone.
We stand in front of the door, like an idiot "I don't have a key" I realized. Fuck
"Can this day get any worse" thump, I hit my forehead in the door "I feel like it should be raining" thump "at least some thunder or something" no thump, the door opened and I went head first into the hellhole of helltown.
And old lady screech and I shat my pants a little, luckily it wasn't my mom, nor her ghost.
She kept on screeching while Matt tried to explain and shit, I couldn't be bothered, I was having a out of body experience, just one screech away from a full blown panic attack, fortunately she was quiet by now, everyone was quiet, it was eerie.
"nope" I turned around and got into my car, and just sat there.
From the door, they were just looking at me, pitting me... PITTING?? ME????Don't they know that I'm awesome???
"Fuck this shit" I need reinforcements, so I grabbed my phone and called Felix, my bff, who also happens to be my lawyer
"Hey Jay" he is always so fuckin cheerful and sunny, what an asshole "how is it going?"
"Oh mmm well fine... I guess, I was just standing in front of her door with the hottest farmboy you'll ever see, when I realized I don't have a fucking key so I started banging my head on the door, like you do, when it opens and I fell on my face and peed a little cause an old lady was screeching and I thought was her ghost trying to kill me for going in to her house, so I bolted and now I'm in the car trying not to drive through the house just to put an end to all this fucking mess" deep breath twice "but other then that every things cool cool cools. I mean, I don't know who da fuck they are, or what are they doing here or what the fuck am I doing here?? Don't I have a lawyer to handle this shit? How bout you? Have fun on your date last night? You better marry the bastard that you choose over our friendship, you know what, fuck you, your fired" and I hang up.
I started banging my head on the steering wheel, because I'm nothing if not consistent.
Five minutes later my phone started ringing. It's Felix.
Deep breath "hey... Did you get all that??"
"Every single word, I think it made it to the top five of my favorite rants... So... Am I fired as a friend or a lawyer?"
"Both, obviously"
"What ever shall I do to regain your favor"
Fuck I love him "can you come here, I mean, or eemm we can..."
"I'm already at the airport"
Thank fucking god "the date was that bad eh?" I really fucking love you
"Meh nothing a few days in a hellmouth can fix"
Finally I can breath again "Helltown, Fel, Helltown. Hellmouth is in Sunnydale"
"Where? Whatever dear, I'm boarding now so I'll text you the details, your picking me up right"
"Yes!!!" I couldn't help it, I pump my arms like I won the world cup of something "I love you so fucking much" fuck
"Of course you do, and I must love you something or how else can you explain that I'm traveling..." Dramatic pause, he is so cute "to. the. North!!" He sounded disgusted, understandably, and he hung up.
He knows I hate deeply the people that hungs up the phone with out saying goodbye, and when I told him that (twenty fucking years ago) he told me that he hates haters and just for that he will no longer say goodbye to me on the phone. He is a man of his word my man.
Not my man aghh