Song Liu seriously started pulling away from everyone after that painful stunt on the stairs; the embarrassment and the fear were just too overwhelming, and he felt like he had to become a fucking ghost just to survive the day. He even started ignoring his only friend, Kevin, because he was terrified that Liang Xu would notice they were talking and decide to target Kevin too, which would be completely his fault and he couldn't live with that kind of guilt. So now, he ate all his meals alone, walked alone, and spent every damn break hiding in the back corner of the nearly deserted library, pretending to read some stupid book while constantly checking the entrance to make sure the psycho bully wasn't walking in to terrorize him again. He was completely alone now, and the silence was almost as painful as the physical attacks had been, making him feel like a pathetic outcast in a crowded school.
The isolation was making his already terrible grades completely collapse, crashing straight down into the dirt, because he was spending all his mental energy surviving and none of it actually studying the required material. He couldn't concentrate for more than about ninety seconds straight; his brain was constantly playing back the sound of Liang Xu's sneering voice or flashing images of that rich bastard's angry face right in the middle of a complex math problem, making it impossible to focus on the work. He got another detention slip yesterday for not turning in a massive history essay, and he knew his mom was going to be really upset when she saw it, adding another layer of shame and misery to his already miserable existence. He wished he could just shut his brain off for a while and stop the terrifying cycle of fear and academic failure that was currently consuming his whole life and destroying his future plans.
He was also starting to fight with his parents more than usual at home, which made him feel like a terrible person because they were already struggling so much just to keep the lights on and the food on the table. They'd ask him why his grades were suddenly so low, or why he was coming home with strange, unexplained bruises on his arms and legs, and he couldn't tell them the truth because he knew they would panic and maybe even go to the school, which would only make Liang Xu ten times angrier. Instead of telling the truth, he would just yell back at them about something stupid, like the terrible food they bought or the lack of decent internet, and then he would immediately feel guilty and retreat to his room to quietly hate himself for being such a fucking ungrateful prick to his only supporters.
One afternoon, the fear and the isolation just got too much for him to handle, and he had a massive emotional breakdown alone in his tiny, pathetic room after school. He didn't even try to hold back the noise this time; he just buried his face in his pillow and sobbed until his throat was completely raw and his eyes felt swollen shut from the sheer amount of tears he was leaking onto the cheap fabric. He hated Liang Xu with every fiber of his being, wishing that powerful bastard would just vanish off the face of the Earth and leave him alone to rebuild his shattered, pathetic life. The sobs were loud and painful, fueled by all the stored-up humiliation and the constant, crushing stress of surviving the daily terror in that rich, cruel high school.
He woke up hours later, groggy and completely exhausted, with a massive headache throbbing behind his eyes, but the breakdown had actually helped a little bit, surprisingly. The overwhelming panic had subsided into a dull, cold ache, which was almost easier to deal with than the constant, manic fear he'd been living with for weeks now. He looked at his reflection in the cheap mirror and barely recognized the tired, pale kid staring back, noticing the new dark circles under his eyes and the general look of total defeat written all over his face. He knew he was a mess, but the crying had let out some of the pressure that had been building inside his chest like a dangerous bomb ready to explode at any moment.
He still had to go to school the next day, though, and the sheer misery of that inescapable reality just settled over him again like a heavy, suffocating blanket of dread. He looked at the picture of his little sister on his desk, her bright smile being the only good, pure thing left in his world, and he knew he couldn't quit yet; he had to keep going for her sake, to ensure she got a better life than this complete hell. He just had to endure the punches and the humiliation until that rich bastard finally got bored and decided to move on to some other unlucky loser, whenever the hell that was going to be.
He swore quietly to himself, his voice raspy and hoarse from crying so hard, that he would start building up his hatred and his strength, saving every single awful memory of Liang Xu's cruelty. He was going to turn this miserable experience into a dangerous weapon, a secret source of fire that would motivate him, even if he couldn't use it yet. For now, he just had to keep breathing and keep walking, surviving the daily gauntlet of terror and humiliation until the day came when he could finally be free of that fucking bully.