The atmosphere was thick with tension.
There were no cicadas, no birds, no gentle murmur of the wind. The only thing that resonated were looks of disgust—and maybe a couple of imaginary knives—directed from the girls' side toward us, the poor misunderstood boys.
The reason?
Simple: someone had stolen Karuizawa's underwear.
And for the girls, there was only one logical and rational explanation:
"Obviously, it was one of you!" Shinohara shouted with the fury of a thousand storms. "Girls wouldn't do something like this!"
Lies.
Big lies.
Absolute lies.
Because if there's one thing I've always believed—and which will probably get me in trouble for saying out loud—it's this:
A woman's worst enemy... is often another woman.
But of course, no one wants to hear that when the drama is in full swing.
"We already told you it wasn't us!" Ike protested, visibly upset, raising his arms as if he were about to be crucified.
"Oh, really? And why should I believe you?" Shinohara spat, raising an eyebrow, fire in her eyes. "You, who always look at us like we're in some damn adult magazine!"
Ike looked at her, shrugged... and opened his mouth to deliver the worst defense possible.
"I don't look at you like that... because you're ugly!"
...
..
.
There was a silence so dense that if someone threw a stone, it would probably bounce back.
"So... you do look at the others lustfully..." Hasebe chimed in, crossing his arms over his chest.
"Huh? N-no! I didn't mean... I mean, yes, but not like that... well, I..." Ike choked on his own words, waving his hands like that would save him from sinking.
"Well done, Ike. Thanks for dragging us down into the pit with you," Mikitani muttered, while several boys buried their faces in their hands.
"Ugh, you guys are the worst," several girls' voices called out, dripping with general disdain.
And just as the civil war was about to break out on this tiny, peaceful island, our knight in shining armor appeared.
"Please, everyone calm down," Hirata intervened, with one of those conciliatory smiles that could make even a hungry bear feel guilty for growling. "There's no point in accusing them without evidence. What matters is maintaining harmony and..."
"Evidence!" Shinohara interrupted, her face lighting up as if she'd just received a divine revelation. "That's it! We'll check all the boys' backpacks! If any of you have the underwear, we'll know."
...
..
.
Panic.
Nervous glances.
Sweat dripping down foreheads that shouldn't even sweat.
And no, not because we were guilty, but because proposals like this are the beginning of the end in any survival story!
"Hey, wait, that's not fair," Sudou frowned. "You can't just check our stuff. What if we check theirs too?"
"Are you suggesting it was one of us?!" Shinohara glared at him as if he had just proposed that pandas should go extinct.
"No! I'm just saying if we're going to look for the culprit, it should be fair!" he replied, crossing his arms.
The battle was about to escalate to biblical proportions, and I... well, I was just thinking how much I missed my tent, my pillow, and my life without underwear theft accusations.
...
My gaze wandered aimlessly as I moved forward in line, backpack in hand, like a prisoner waiting for his turn to be interrogated for war crimes.
The reason? Well, we were being inspected.
Yes, literally having our backpacks checked for Karuizawa's missing underwear. A situation as absurd as it was uncomfortable.
But hey, I was calm.
First: I didn't have that underwear.
Second: as long as they finished quickly so I could go back to scratching my stomach in peace, all was well.
And third—most importantly—I had my charming defense attorneys ready to take the stand for me: Matsushita and Sato.
They would protect me to the death... or at least with sarcasm and eye rolls, which in this context was the same thing.
That's when my eyes met an unexpected figure.
Ibuki.
You're probably wondering, "Who the hell is Ibuki?"
Some random classmate I forgot to mention?
A mysterious girl sent by fate?
No, nothing that poetic.
Ibuki is a student from Class C. Another class. And even stranger: she's camping with us.
Why? Well, apparently she was expelled from her group. Just like that. They sent her packing.
And what did she do? Instead of leaving like any normal person, she decided to stay on her own risk... hoping to see her classmates at the final cruise. Brave. Reckless. Or both.
Important fact: Class C had already fully withdrawn. Everyone.
Well, almost everyone.
Because Ibuki isn't the only straggler.
The other one is a guy named Kaneda, who mysteriously was taken in by Class B.
Yes, that Class B.
Yes, the one led by Ichinose.
Yes, the same Ichinose who told me there was no extra space when I asked if I could come spy and hang out with them for a bit.
Lies, Ichinose. Lies wrapped in adorable smiles.
And if you think it's already too much, here's the juiciest part:
Ibuki and Kaneda are from the same class.
Class C.
The class whose leader is none other than Ryuuen.
Yes, that Ryuuen. The one they say is a potential delinquent. A villain straight out of an anime in a school uniform.
So we have an Ibuki with us, a Kaneda with Class B... and a missing Ryuuen along with his entire class, as if abducted by aliens.
This, my friends, smells like espionage.
But spying on whom, if no one from Class C is visible anywhere?
Are they hiding in a secret cave?
Flying over the island in a camouflaged airship?
I don't know.
And honestly... I don't really care that much.
All I want is for this absurd inspection to end and for my peace of mind to be returned.
Finally, when it was my turn, they opened my backpack.
Zero foreign underwear. Just a toothbrush, the survival manual, and a spare set of clothes sadder than my math average.
All in order.
With a diplomatic smile and intact dignity, I stepped back to return my backpack to the tent.
I sighed.
Another crisis survived.
For now.
"We don't trust the boys, so we'll move our tents away from these perverts," Shinohara declared firmly, as if exiling us by royal decree.
And even though they didn't find Karuizawa's underwear in any of our backpacks, distrust still hung in the air like a bad smell no one wanted to admit.
"Hirata-kun, will you help us move?" several girls asked almost simultaneously, with that selective sweetness they only show to certain types.
And of course, Hirata, the knight in shining armor of this class, didn't know how to say no.
No wonder he's so popular. Even I trusted him. Maybe too much.
And that's why no boy fully trusted him either.
"Uh... well..." he hesitated, visibly uncomfortable. Because Hirata, though the "hero" of the group, also has a strong sense of justice and didn't like taking sides or appearing to favor only the girls.
"It will be difficult to do it alone..." he finally sighed, as if accepting his fate.
"Besides you, we can't trust any other boy," Shinohara added.
Hey!
"Aren't you forgetting Endo-kun, Shinohara?" Satō suddenly interjected.
Satō, traitor! Not the time to offer me as a sacrifice!
"Oh, right. Endo-kun is a good boy, not like the other perverts," Ichihashi added with a smile.
Thanks... but did it have to be right now?
"If it's Endo-kun, I wouldn't mind," Hasebe added, shrugging.
Okay, yes, female support is nice and all, but can we at least wait until I'm not being dragged to carry tents to say it?
"Would you help me, Endo-kun?" Hirata asked, giving me those puppy eyes that make you feel guilty even when you've done nothing wrong.
Oh no. No no no. I need an excuse! A way out! Anything!
"Hirata, I'd love to help you, really, from the bottom of my heart," I said, giving my best martyr face, "but I promised Kushida I'd help her gather firewood. You know, don't want to keep her waiting, right, Kushida?"
And I gave her the most pleading look of my life. Come on, Kushida, be the heroine I need.
"Oh, I'm sorry, Hirata-kun," Kushida said, putting her finger on her cheek sweetly, "but bringing the firewood alone would be very difficult. Could you ask someone else for help?"
Thank you, Kushida! I owe you my life!
"Ah... okay," Hirata replied, slightly dejected.
And there I was, feeling guilty again. Damn, Hirata. You can't be such a good guy. You make me feel like a terrible person.
I sighed.
I'll help you this time, Hirata. But know that I'm doing it for you, not for those crazy girls who want to move just because they lost a pair of panties.
Then my gaze shifted to the right.
And there it was: the perfect target.
"Why don't you ask Ayanokouji for help? He looks willing to cooperate," I said with a smile.
The mentioned boy looked at me with his usual expression: neutral, empty, unreadable.
In other words, the face of someone probably silently plotting my assassination.
"Ayanokouji-kun? Are you busy?" Hirata asked.
"No. I can help you," he replied, not changing his tone, as if he were talking about drinking water or killing someone with his own hands. Who knows.
You're welcome, Hirata. I just got you elite labor.
"Well, guys, see you!" I said, turning quickly to go with Kushida.
But before walking away completely, I glanced back.
Ayanokouji was still watching me.
Is he upset? Curious? Planning revenge?
Who knows.
But as they say: the quietest one is always the most dangerous.