We arrived at the cancer ward. Going to the ward at this hour felt like visiting a seriously ill relative for the last time.
As we passed the nurses' station, the night nurse asked which bed we were in. Xu Tuo replied perfectly, "We are the family members of bed 18, Liu Jianhua."
The nurse left us alone.
Is the person in bed 18 really called Liu Jianhua? I looked at him suspiciously. Xu Tuo patted my head. "I just made it up. These wards have a high turnover rate. Someone's admitted on one Monday and might be sent out the next. It doesn't matter if Bed 18's name is Liu Jianhua, Wang Jianhua, or Zhou Huajian."
The Fifth Municipal Hospital, a top-tier tertiary institution in the city, was packed with beds in the oncology wards, and the hallways were filled with beds for patients and their families. The once spacious hallways were stacked on either side with beds, leaving only a narrow space in the middle suitable for passing people. As we walked through the mass of sleeping patients and their families, it felt like we were walking on a carpet of human skin.
"Do you like Ajie?" He suddenly asked me this question.
I was stunned.
"I was looking at the music app on your phone once, and it had his album cover."
"Ah... I used to listen to it on the way to school." I didn't want to admit that I had saved my pocket money to buy his CDs.
"I haven't heard his songs yet."
"Why? You two seem very familiar with each other."
"It's because we're too familiar with each other that I'm not interested in what he does. You see, you're not interested in what I do either," he said with a smile. "But I occasionally see his promotional photos, and they're so normal that I'm almost unrecognizable."
No, he just reveals his essence to us.
Once people in this world step into the realm of being "adults," they adopt a more normal appearance. They go to and from get off work on time during the day, smile at their colleagues, order a set meal for lunch, and study the subway transfer map.
What's going on in their heads? Do they want to be forced into a flower bed by the breakfast vendor? Do they want to kill that boss who's always talking nonsense? Do they want to push the woman taking a selfie off the platform while waiting for the subway? Do they want to secretly pee like a dog in a public square? Do they want to strangle every stray cat and child they see along the way?
Most people, until their death, never encounter a situation where they can completely shed their mask. Beneath the mask of normalcy, human nature is inherently bizarre. "Normal" is merely a self-imposed illusion. The phrase "we are all normal" itself is the most absurd safeword in this absurd world.
The so-called soul mate or true love is nothing more than meeting someone who can accept you for who you are. After all, humans are called humans, not normal people.
There are no normal people among humans.
Xu Tuo once told me that people are easily attracted to abnormal things.
Because abnormality is the essence, and essence is of course fascinating. Experienced people can even carefully leave the scent of their essence among the crowd, or even emit it unintentionally.
"That guy named Qi Mengzhu was attracted to you, right?" he said. We were standing outside the doctor's office. This was the meeting place Qi Mengzhu had mentioned. "I underestimated you. You're very attractive to Juice Man."
"'Juice Man'?"
"Some people are like juice. They appear to be healthy foods rich in vitamins, but they actually contain excessive amounts of sugar and are inherently dangerous. There are many people who love juice. People like you who are not good at hiding your true nature are like banned drugs to them."
I was a little unconvinced: "I am normal in front of other people."
He laughed a few times and pushed open the office door.
However, the scene behind the door was beyond our expectations.
No matter how I thought about it, this wasn't how a meeting with Qi Mengzhu should have been. In my imagination, we'd all be talking in a dark stairwell, like three cockroaches afraid of the light. Or, he'd be waiting for us alone in a dark, empty office.
This shouldn't be the scene.
The office lights were on, and it wasn't quiet; it was even bustling. At this hour, there were five people inside, and the air was filled with the alluring aroma of fried food and spicy hot pot.
The source of the fragrance was the midnight snack bag on the desk.
A nurse in her forties and a young doctor were playing with their phones by the window, while two other doctors were discussing a case at their computers. Qi Mengzhu was sitting on the sofa in the office.
The two doctors discussing the case—one a bit older, the other about thirty-five—had a smile that made everyone smile. When we walked into the office, the older doctor seemed to assume we were family members seeking consultation and patted the younger doctor on the shoulder. "Xiao Dong, keep going. I'll be back downstairs."
Doctor Dong looked up at us, his eyes filled with a soft and gentle smile. He nodded to the old doctor and said, "Okay, thank you, Teacher Zhang."
The nurse glanced at us and breathed a sigh of relief: "I thought it was another female family member of bed 5. She comes every time you're on duty, and comes every two hours to make trouble. She says the patient's mouth is sweet, sour, and bitter..."
The young doctor chimed in: "She just has a crush on Teacher Dong. Teacher Dong, when will you let her be our mistress?"
"A midnight snack can't stop you from talking?" Doctor Dong's voice was very gentle, as if he was talking to two children. Then he took two books and stood up and asked Qi Mengzhu, "Mr. Qi, are these two your friends?"
Qi Mengzhu looked at me first, then stared at Xu Tuo warily. Doctor Dong didn't seem to care much about the two of us coming, and said gently, "Let's go to the duty room and talk."
Our strange night patrol team walked through the ward corridor. Made up of a Buddhist doctor, a business elite, an ordinary clerk, and a casual hunting enthusiast, it felt like a real-life Octopath Traveler. Fortunately, no one else was in the duty room.
Dr. Dong closed the door and said, "Can we get started? We'd better not delay any longer."
"Wait, who is this man?" Qi Mengzhu asked.
Xu Tuo tilted his head: "Does the back of your head still hurt?"
Qi Mengzhu covered the back of his head and took a step back in disgust: "Dai Xueming, why did you bring him here? You clearly know that I asked you to come here..."
"He won't tell anyone, I promise." Of all the people present, the one least likely to tell anyone was probably Xu Tuo. I looked at Dr. Dong, "This doctor is..."
"Ah, hello, my name is Dong Quanming, I'm a doctor in this department, and I'm on night shift tonight."
"…" I stared at Qi Mengzhu in astonishment.
"Doctor Dong recommended Bed 18 to me," Qi Mengzhu said. "Bed 18 is willing to be..."
Halfway through his speech, he glanced at Xu Tuo and stopped talking.
Bed 18, what a coincidence.
Not sure if it was intentional or if he really didn't understand, Xu Tuo pressed on: "What did you do to me?"
"...Dai Xueming! Get this guy out! Don't let him know!"
"I'm not trying to embarrass you, but there's something I need to understand. What exactly do you want to do?" Xu Tuo folded his arms, leaned back slightly, and adjusted his breathing. I knew his little movements; they showed he was really losing his patience.
I could only vouch for him again: "Go ahead and tell him. I swear he won't tell anyone."
After hearing my assurance, Qi Mengzhu finally started to speak. Just like when he confronted me, he showed that slightly arrogant expression: "Don't be afraid after hearing this."
Xu Tuo frowned. I sighed.
"I want to..." He paused for a few seconds deliberately, like unveiling a delicious dish, "I want to kill someone."
"..." Xu Tuo leaned against the door with his arms folded, waiting for him to continue. After a few seconds, he realized that Qi Mengzhu had actually finished speaking, and he couldn't help but open his eyes wide: "And then?"
If I hadn't been wary of the strange Dr. Dong next to me, I would have crouched on the ground and laughed. After all, there were strangers around, so I could only try my best to hold back and scoff.
"——Is it funny?" At this time, Dong Quanming next to him suddenly said.
I looked up and found that the man was looking at me with a compassionate look.
"Mr. Qi wanted to try his hand at 'controlling life and death.' He could have traveled to other Southeast Asian countries, chosen a random victim, even paid someone to become one... He clearly had the power to do whatever he wanted, but he chose restraint, self-discipline, and patience." Dr. Dong's dark eyes, like deep pools of ancient water, gazed at me. "I respect Mr. Qi very much. He wanted to choose a willing victim, to give them a painless death, rather than killing innocent people indiscriminately. Isn't that admirable?"
"Listen, isn't this worthy of admiration?" I lowered my voice and repeated softly to Xu Tuo.
"Then...reward him with a little red flower?" Xu Tuo asked me.
We were arguing, and Qi Mengzhu cleared his throat. "Anyway, I'm going to send Bed 18 off later. He's a young man with pancreatic cancer, and it's already in the late stages. He's in so much pain every day that he wants to die, but he doesn't have the courage to commit suicide."
Currently, euthanasia is not available in China. Death is not an option. In a sense, if the person is truly terminally ill, incurable, and living only adds to their suffering, then Qi Mengzhu's appearance might be their hope.
Doctor Dong dismissed the nurse on duty and went with Qi Mengzhu to the nurses' station to prepare. I followed them to observe the situation—mostly because Xu Tuo's injury was still hurting, and he was resting in the duty room, so I went to get some painkillers. In the cancer ward, these weren't hard to come by.
It was almost dawn. I asked him, "Why don't you change the time?"
"I have eight meetings every day, today and tomorrow," Qi Mengzhu said. "Do you think that real-life executives of large companies are like those in TV dramas, spending ten minutes a day in their offices having inner monologues and the rest of the time just dating?"
"How long have you been planning this?"
"Today..." He glanced at Dong Quanming beside him, "This is the first time we meet."
——I almost dropped the painkiller on the ground.
After helping me dispose of the body that night, Qi Mengzhu was in a daze for several hours. He was almost desperate and ready to succumb to the simplest option - to select his target among the seriously ill patients.
After a full day of meetings at the company, he went to the cancer department building of the Fifth Municipal Hospital. Initially, he was just looking for a target, but then, Qi Mengzhu met Dong Quanming.
Doctor Dong seemed to be able to see through everything in his heart. Not only did he understand his request, but he also recommended bed 18 for him.
The young man in bed 18 with advanced pancreatic cancer wasn't called Jianhua; his name was Ji Yuyi. Qi Mengzhu planned to administer an IV drip to him, and Dong Quanming prepared the medication for him. As he did so, he comforted Qi Mengzhu, "Don't worry... Just insert the needle into the IV. He won't feel any pain... You'll do fine..."
This scene reminded me of the time when Xu Tuo almost killed me. That person also comforted me in such a gentle tone, telling me not to be afraid.
Qi Mengzhu took the medicine and went to the ward with bed 18.
I was going back to the lounge to give Xu Tuo the painkillers.
"Aren't you coming to see it?" Dong Quanming asked me. In front, Qi Mengzhu had already walked into the ward.
"Not interested. My friend and I will be leaving in a while."
"Really not coming?" He looked at me with a smile.
"No."
"What a shame."
...What's a pity?
I vaguely sensed something was amiss. Dong Quanming stood in the corridor between me and the lounge, unwilling to let me pass. Both sides of the corridor were filled with hospital beds, with people fast asleep on them. These beds had squeezed the corridor so tightly that if I wanted to get around him, I had to squeeze past one of them.
The hallway lights were off, and in the dim space, I tried to squeeze past the patient's bed without bumping into him.
But it is inevitable to encounter it.
"Sorry..." I apologized softly, worried I'd wake him. However, there was no movement from the bed.
—Moonlight streamed in from the window beside the corridor, falling on the man's face. I froze in shock.
That's not a living face.
He was already dead. Blue veins could be seen on the man's pale face, his mouth slightly open, his tongue hanging out like a hanged dog.
It's not just him.
All the people in the beds on either side were motionless, without the regular breathing expected in sleep. Those silent beds, even the silent wards, all those inside had died before we arrived.
"Ah..." Dong Quanming let out a sound that was hard to tell whether it was a sigh or a laugh, "I've been discovered."
"——Xu Tuo!" I immediately shouted at the top of my lungs. At this moment, I heard footsteps pausing behind me.
I turned around—behind me, the old doctor who had been in the office was standing in surprise, patting his chest.
"I was scared to death..." the old man muttered, "Why is there such a loud noise suddenly... This is a hospital."
"Run!" I said to him.
The old man looked as if he didn't know what was happening. He looked at me, then at Dong Quanming. Then he said something that made me feel like I was falling into an ice cellar.
"—Why haven't you dealt with him yet, Xiaodong?"