"And now you shall live again my child. But beware of…"
What? What is it?
I don't understand… What is it?
A single distant echo morphed into indistinct whispers, tugging me back to consciousness.
Man Speaking:
"Is it not my love, the night that bears no moon, will hold the guilts of our hearts?
Thus, for this night alone let it hold all our desires…"
A thunderous applaud filled the dazzling ambience as my heart rushed to go with the beat. Cold sweat dotted my forehead as stale theatre air — not the damp prison cell — filled my lungs. I wasn't dreaming. My mind hazed as panic filled my heart. My vision blurred as cold steel bit into my flesh. The iron tang of blood flooded my mouth, and my knees buckled under the weight of that final breath.
I felt a tug on my wrist bringing my vision back to the man playing Romeo beside me. A man who has held me through various ups and downs of this harsh life. A hand that often became the warm source of comfort through despair – now it felt as cold and heavy as a blunt axe against my skin. A friend? A source of comfort? Don't make me laugh!
Jordan tugged my wrist. He leaned close and mouthed, "What's wrong? Smile, Selena."
The director of the Hearts & passion troupe had spent months on this spin off of Romeo & Juliet. I was never meant to be Juliet. This role was not written for the likes of me. Someone like me… I hate it how easily that thought rolls off my tongue. Even harsher to realise I got used to it.
The stage curtains fell flawlessly separating the crew from the crowd. Without delay for the second time of my life I grab the hem of the most beautiful dress I have worn in my life - Juliet's princess ball dress and run backstage. I pass by Alya- the original Juliet sitting with her feet up on a stool with a cast on. Her face scrunched up with rage and jealousy. Just like it had been before. In the past I would have been cowering beneath her feet That's how I had always been- no that's how I was trained to be- the perfect doormat. Without doubt even now she is preparing herself on how to get back at me for taking her spot- though I had no say in this matter to begin with.
Ignoring all the whispers, taunts and jealous gazes, I make my way to the powder room. I had no time for fear or other nonsense — something impossible had just happened. And then I saw her: the girl in the mirror looked back at me was the 15-year-old girl that I could hardly remember. When was the last time I saw my own face without a scar? Without the dark shadows of death and torture? And feet without a limp?
As the lamp in the powder room flickered, a shadow of an old middle‑aged man flashed through my mind. Man? No, a demon. One without emotions. Without humanity. A monster ready to eat my blood and bones as he devoured me.
A silent scream threatened to escape my throat but I quickly cover my face with my hands – which are still soft and young.
I was back. As hard as it is to believe, I have come back in time. A time where it hadn't gotten worse. I haven't gone through my worst nightmare. Not yet.
God... Thank God… Thank God...
I sink to my knees, tears stinging my eyes as relief washed over me. I was alive.
I feel my soul shudder and my entire body tremble as reality set in waves. An unexplainable emotion…out of the world experience. I wrap my arms around myself and soak in the moment calming my heart that was filled with rage, desperation, sadness and betrayal. I have endured a death more horrifying than any sinner could imagine… and now, I am back.
I am back.