Chapter 254: Who Has the Sharpest Tongue?
Let's rewind a few hours.
Chuck rebooted the computer, and young Howard, terrified, fled with his mechanical companion.
"Aren't you afraid you'll really break it?"
Dr. House looked at Chuck with interest. "Or are you really that confident?"
"What do you think?"
Chuck retorted.
"Dr. Wolfe is definitely confident!"
the attractive Dr. Cameron couldn't help but say.
"That's hard to say,"
Chandler couldn't help but tease. "I think it's more like he doesn't care, since it wasn't his that would get broken~"
Everyone else turned to look at Chuck.
Chuck didn't give an answer in front of everyone.
Was he confident?
Actually, he was.
Leaving aside the fact that in the original timeline this was resolved through a reboot, Chuck, standing there with Anna behind his glasses, had already remotely hacked into the computer, checked the program, and confirmed that the reboot would work correctly.
He was just taking the opportunity to mess with young Howard; he hadn't intended to permanently damage the still-young Howard.
Young Howard was indeed quite perverted, but not to that extent.
Of course, even if an accident did occur, it wouldn't matter.
As Chandler said, it wasn't his own that would get broken.
And for the king of perverts, Howard, this wouldn't be the end of the world.
After all, according to Leonard's mother, Beverly, the Howard of the original timeline didn't actually need a girlfriend or wife... Howard said this was just Beverly being cruel, and it would seriously hurt the feelings of his best friend who couldn't defend himself.
Beverly's harsh mother-son relationship with Leonard is controversial, but her professionalism cannot be denied.
She dared to say these things repeatedly, of course, not just making things up.
Leaving aside the overly suspicious aspects of their daily interactions, let's look at some concrete examples.
In Howard's fantasies, besides Katee Sackhoff from Battlestar Galactica, there's also George Takei, who played Sulu in Star Trek.
Honestly, it's hard to say whether Howard loves his future wife Bernadette more or his best friend more.
Moreover, in this timeline, Howard likely wouldn't have had the chance to discuss family sedans with Bernadette.
While Bernadette's research might still ostensibly focus on microorganisms, her passion for giant creatures far surpassed anything in the original timeline.
Dr. House didn't dwell on the topic, instead looking at Joey with a smirk: "Dr. Drake Ramoray, finally seeing you in person! I'm a huge fan of yours."
"I know,"
Joey proudly puffed out his chest, pouted, and smiled at the nurse beside him: "Excuse me, could you get me a coat?"
"Dr. Ramoray, here you go!"
A doctor who recognized Joey took off his white coat and handed it to him.
"Thank you."
After thanking him, Joey draped the coat over his shoulders, feeling much better immediately. He smiled at Dr. House and said, "You must be Dr. House, right? I've heard Chuck mention your case. Shall we begin?"
"Begin what?"
Before Dr. House could speak, his good friend Dr. Wilson, feeling quite confused, asked.
"Ahem."
Dr. Drake Joey Ramoray coughed lightly, straightened his white coat, and said seriously to Dr. House, "Gregory, we need to talk, privately."
"No need for privacy."
Dr. Greg House laughed, "With such a grand audience tonight, it would be a waste to just focus on one teenager's bizarre case. Although they already feel it's been worthwhile, I don't think any of them would want to miss hearing the renowned Dr. Drake Ramoray provide a live consultation."
The group of doctors, who had initially complained about being called over, were now filled with joy and felt their trip was worthwhile.
Now, seeing a TV star guest-starring as a doctor, even giving a live consultation to the sharp-tongued Dr. House, was something not to be missed.
"Are you sure?"
Dr. Drake Joey Ramoray couldn't help but glance at Chuck.
"Hey! I'm the patient now, I make the decisions!"
Dr. House laughed.
"Okay."
Dr. Drake Joey Ramoray, wearing a white coat, walked over to Dr. House, mimicking a scene from a TV drama, then said seriously, "Gregory, I have good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?"
"The bad news, I guess."
Dr. House played along perfectly, "The good news later will be double the fun!"
"Your leg injury is indeed incurable."
Dr. Drake Joey Ramoray followed exactly what Chuck had told him on the phone, without even the improvisation he usually showed to directors.
"And the good news?"
Dr. House looked at him with amusement.
"The good news is you can get rid of painkillers."
A smile instantly appeared on Dr. Drake Joey Ramoray's serious lips.
"How do I get rid of them?"
Dr. House gave Chuck a mocking look. "Don't tell me it's another case of enduring self-torture. I'm not that masochistic. Why wouldn't I just enjoy the drugs?"
"That's simple. I'll write you a prescription."
Dr. Drake Joey Ramoray perked up, knowing the crucial moment for testing his acting skills had arrived. So he fully embraced the role of the actor-doctor, and, ignoring the strange looks from the crowd, reached into his pants and pulled out a cane.
"..."
Everyone was momentarily speechless at this sight.
What the hell was this?
However, his good friend Dr. Wilson and the three team doctors, who knew the whole story, were both amused and exasperated. They knew Chuck was subtly mocking Dr. House for not actually needing painkillers and being able to get by with just a cane.
Sure enough.
Chuck really disapproved of his friend Dr. House's drug addiction, and this was the point he kept targeting.
"...You really can't judge a book by its cover~"
Dr. House immediately caught Chuck's sarcasm, a smirk playing on his lips as he retorted, "You're not tall, your looks are just average, and your medical skills are mediocre at best. No wonder you're so popular in the show; you must have hidden talents~"
"So, what do you think?"
Chuck, noticing Dr. House was targeting Joey but looking at him, said seriously, "And it comes with a hook."
"Alright, that's enough for now. Everyone, go home and rest; you have work tomorrow."
Dr. Wilson quickly dispersed the crowd. He didn't know the specific reference Chuck was making, but looking at the handle of the cane, he guessed it wasn't anything nice. Letting Chuck and Dr. House continue would make everyone uncomfortable.
Dr. Wilson was the head of the oncology department at Princeton-Plainsboro Teaching Hospital, a renowned and experienced doctor in the field, and naturally possessed the authority of a senior physician.
His words, even though the doctors who had been watching wanted to continue, had no choice but to reluctantly leave out of respect for Dr. Wilson.
"Well done!"
Dr. House, unconcerned that Joey had hidden the cane in his pants, casually took it, played with it for a few moments, and laughed at Chuck, "Using this twisted, convoluted way to mock me, that's brilliant. Are you sure you didn't tamper with that kid's robotic hand, deliberately getting it stuck?"
Whether it was Howard's mechanical arm-like grip or Joey pulling out a cane-like object from his pants, they were both gripping support tightly—no wonder he was suspicious.
Hmm.
If it were him, he could pull off the same thing.
Interesting, isn't it?
As soon as he said this, his old friends immediately looked over.
"So it was you!"
Ross immediately believed him.
Because he felt that Chuck was capable of such a devious act, and also had the ability to do it.
"How could you do this!"
"Do I need to deliberately create an accident to mock you?"
Chuck completely ignored Ross, only looking at Dr. House: "It was just a coincidence, I just added a little subplot."
Dr. House stared at Chuck, somewhat disbelieving.
At the urging of the kind-hearted Dr. Wilson, Chuck and Dr. House were separated, and the group began to have interesting conversations in small groups.
Foreman and Chase, naturally, were attracted by Rachel and Phoebe's beauty.
Rachel and Phoebe were both quite interested in the handsome Dr. Chase, especially Rachel, who had a strong affinity for doctors because her father was one. She was particularly enthusiastic in chatting with Dr. Chase.
Ross watched, feeling incredibly frustrated.
Chuck ignored him completely, and now not a single one of his old friends stood up for him, utterly disregarding his feelings.
This was unbearable.
And now, the woman he had always longed for was showing interest in another man right in front of him.
He was just a handsome doctor!
Who wasn't a doctor?
"Let me introduce myself, Dr. Ross Geller,"
a disgruntled Ross said, walking over and extending his hand to Dr. Chase, who was surrounded by Rachel and Phoebe, emphasizing the word "Doctor."
"Dr. Robert Chase."
Dr. Chase smiled and shook his hand. "You're a doctor too?"
"Of course not."
Rachel immediately waved her hand with a laugh, her disdain overflowing. Not content with that, she made air quotes with both hands. "He's that kind of doctor—unlike you, a real doctor."
"That's well said."
Dr. House, who was chatting with Joey about Days of Our Lives, looked over with a smile. "Not every doctor is a doctor!"
"Have we met somewhere before?"
Rachel smiled back at him, looking closely at Dr. House's face, and asked curiously.
"Unless you worked as a call girl to pay for your college tuition, we probably haven't met."
Dr. House said sarcastically. "If we had, I certainly wouldn't forget your face."
"Thank you."
Rachel didn't catch the sarcasm in his words; she only heard Dr. House complimenting her beauty and readily accepted it.
"House!"
His friend Wilson glared at Dr. House helplessly, feeling that Dr. House was being provocative again.
Although the words were addressed to Rachel, they were a dig at Chuck's friend for doing this kind of work.
Chuck wasn't the type to take an insult without retaliating; the harmonious situation he'd painstakingly created was likely to crumble again in a few minutes.
"Not necessarily."
Sure enough, Chuck, who was talking to Monica and Chandler, looked over and said expressionlessly, "Maybe you're just so high on pills you forgot who's standing behind you. Chandler, tell Dr. House."
"Let me give you a proper introduction!"
Chandler, naturally, wouldn't miss the chance to participate in this playful and humorous segment, gliding over to Rachel, waving his hands and gesturing at her, making a show of giving a proper introduction to everyone.
"Rachel Green, a distinguished graduate of Lincoln High School on Long Island, New York, but what everyone talks about most is that she's also the legendary Backdoor Betty from the urban legends of New York!"
Rachel's smiling face froze instantly. She waved her hand at the equally bewildered Dr. Chase, saying, "I'm not!"
"Heh, I believe you,"
Dr. Chase said, but his earlier enthusiasm had largely dissipated.
Better safe than sorry.
He wasn't Chandler!
Nor Howard!
Nor Dr. House!
"I always thought House had the sharpest tongue,"
Foreman, who had been somewhat annoyed by being ignored by the two beauties Rachel and Phoebe, suddenly laughed when he saw Chuck arguing with Dr. House again.
"Now I realize I overestimated him and underestimated the world! He's so high on drugs he forgot Backdoor Betty is standing right behind him, classic, hahaha!"
"And you call yourself Detective Chuck!"
Dr. House didn't mind, instead laughing back with amusement: "Do you think my bad leg can do that kind of position? Making such a basic mistake, it's probably a pose you've rehearsed countless times in your head!"
"That's enough, you two."
Dr. Wilson helplessly stood between the two, trying to block their eye contact: "This is such a nice gathering, why make it like this?"
He then winked at Monica and the others, signaling them to intervene and smooth things over.
Monica simply pulled Chuck out: "I heard Alicia is hospitalized here, come with me to see her."
Intensive Care Unit.
"Monica, you're here."
Professor Alicia Harper, lying in her hospital bed, immediately greeted Monica with a smile as she entered with Chuck.
"Alicia, are you alright?"
Monica quickly went to Professor Alicia Harper's bedside to inquire about her well-being.
As a fellow super-genius woman, she felt a great deal in common with Professor Harper, and hearing that Professor Harper had suffered so much, she felt a deep sense of empathy.
Professor Harper glanced at Chuck, who appeared perfectly composed, suppressed a complex emotion, and smiled as she answered Monica's various expressions of concern.
In the intensive care unit, it was mostly Monica's voice that could be heard.
At first, Monica didn't think there was anything wrong with it; after all, Chuck was naturally quiet, and while Professor Harper was better, she was still ill, so it was normal for her to be subdued.
But as they talked, she sensed something was off.
There was no way around it!
Professor Alicia Harper wasn't a professional at hiding emotions, and facing this situation for the first time, she couldn't help but glance at Chuck too frequently, finally triggering Monica's intuition.
At some point, Monica stopped, looking at Professor Alicia Harper, then at Chuck, her expression complex.
Professor Alicia Harper opened her mouth as if to speak, but didn't know what to say.
Chuck had no intention of speaking at all.
The intensive care unit fell silent.
(End of Chapter)
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