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Chapter 14 - Chapter 14 – Feature taming, legal counsel

The directive banner still glowed faintly in Jace's vision as he locked up the apartment behind him.

Directive: Calibrate or disable unintended vendor features before complaints escalate

Targets: Bean Scene grinder, Flower fridge, Espresso trumpet

RP Reward: 150

Time Limit: End of day

Penalty: Temporary suspension of bonus‑feature integration

---

The Game Plan

Riley was waiting downstairs with two travel mugs.

"Fuel," she said, handing him one. "If we have to undo some of your… creative excesses, we'd better start early."

Patchwork's voice piped up: Excuse me, "creative excesses"? I prefer to think of them as unsolicited, premium‑tier value additions.

"Premium lawsuits if we don't fix them," Jace muttered.

---

Stop 1: Bean Scene Roasters

The Bean Scene was already buzzing when they arrived. The moment they stepped through the door, the grinder announced at full volume: "Medium roast detected. Adjusting grind to coarse. Warning: barista's claim about roast date is FALSE."

Half the customers turned to stare. The barista behind the counter, a woman in her twenties with dark lipstick and an expression that could curdle milk, waved them over with visible relief.

"You must be Jace," she said. "This thing has been roasting me more than the beans."

Patchwork chuckled in his head. Self‑aware appliances are the future.

---

The Fix

Jace knelt by the grinder, Riley stepping up to smooth things over with the customers. "Free biscotti for anyone traumatized by coffee gossip," she announced.

"Alright," Jace murmured, "let's see what you've been up to."

Enhancing transparency, Patchwork said innocently. Fine, fine — I'll dial the honesty down to a whisper.

They dove into the grinder's service menu. With Patchwork feeding him override codes, Jace changed the "Truth Level" from "Public Address" to "Subtle Chime." Now, instead of blurting out lies, it would give a quiet notification light visible only to the barista.

"Test it," Jace said.

The barista approached, holding a bag of beans. "Light roast, fresh this morning."

The grinder stayed silent, a small amber LED blinking once.

The barista smiled. "Perfect."

---

The Bonus Feature

Patchwork: While we're in here, I'm adding a roast‑age timer that counts down in days since roasting and flashes if it's over ten. Quietly. No more coffee courtrooms.

The barista nodded approvingly. "That's… actually kind of brilliant."

Payment: $65 cash.

Patchwork: $11.05 added to Pending Taxes. Current total: $706.17.

Wealth: $2,790.75 → $2,855.75

---

Stop 2: Petal & Stem Florist

The mini‑fridge sat just inside the shop, scrolling trivia about tulips and begonias across its LED strip.

"Cute the first day," the florist said. "Then it started sharing cactus mating facts."

Riley tried not to laugh. "We can tone it down."

---

The Fix

Jace opened the fridge panel and navigated to the display controller. "You really went to town, didn't you?" he whispered.

Knowledge is power, bud. And sometimes weirdly specific horticulture trivia is power.

They adjusted the display's content source, swapping from "Random Facts" to "Care Tips" relevant to whatever bouquet was inside.

---

The Bonus Feature

Patchwork: Couldn't help myself — added a humidity sensor. If the fridge thinks the flowers are drying out, it'll flash a soft green glow to remind staff to mist them.

The florist's eyes widened. "That's actually… amazing."

Payment: $50 and a small bouquet "for the manager."

Patchwork: $8.50 added to Pending Taxes. Current total: $714.67.

Wealth: $2,855.75 → $2,905.75

---

Stop 3: Caffè Allegro (a.k.a. the Espresso Trumpet)

They heard it before they saw it: a triumphant brass fanfare rolling down the block, followed by steam venting across the shop's window like a stage fog effect.

Inside, the owner was grinning ear‑to‑ear. "It's ridiculous," he said. "Also amazing. But my neighbor's threatening to call the cops."

---

The Fix

Jace accessed the wand's pressure sensor settings. "We'll keep the fanfare," he promised, "but at a volume that won't get you a noise complaint."

Boring, Patchwork grumbled, but complied — setting the decibels to "jazzy background" instead of "marching band."

---

The Bonus Feature

Patchwork: I added an auto‑purge when the fanfare plays. Clears any milk residue instantly. Your health inspector will love me.

Payment: $55.

Patchwork: $9.35 added to Pending Taxes. Current total: $724.02.

Wealth: $2,905.75 → $2,960.75

---

Directive Complete

As they stepped back onto the street, the directive banner in Jace's HUD pulsed.

Directive Complete – RP +150

RP Total: 270

Patchwork: Well done. You didn't even electrocute yourself this time.

Riley elbowed him lightly. "Three happy clients, all with less chaos… mostly."

---

The Unexpected Twist

Jace's phone buzzed. It was Sterling Vent.

"You're not going to believe this," Sterling said. "That watch? Just got me a confession in under two minutes."

Jace smiled. "Glad it's working."

"Working so well," Sterling continued, "that my managing partner wants to hire you to… improve some other 'tools' in our office."

Patchwork's tone was positively gleeful. Field trip to a law firm. Think of all the toys we could make tell the truth.

Riley looked at Jace over her coffee. "We might need to clear our calendar."

---

Status Update

Technician: Jace Thorn

RP Total: 270

Wealth: $2,960.75

Pending Taxes: $724.02

---

The elevator doors slid open to reveal the 14th floor of Vent, Mallory & Crowley LLP.

Polished marble floors, glass walls, and the faint smell of expensive coffee screamed billable hours.

Riley leaned in. "This place is… intimidating."

Patchwork: It's like walking into a shark tank, but the sharks wear suits and bill you for the bite.

Sterling Vent was waiting in the reception area, grinning like a man who'd just won a case on a technicality.

"Jace! Riley! Glad you could make it. Follow me — I've got a few… projects."

---

The Tour

Sterling led them past rows of cubicles into a conference room where three items sat on the table:

1. A high-end conference speakerphone.

2. A document shredder.

3. A multi-function copier/printer/scanner the size of a small car.

"These," Sterling said, "are the lifeblood of this office. And they're all… temperamental."

Patchwork: Translation: they're about to become my playground.

---

Repair 1 – Conference Speakerphone

Sterling explained: "Half the time, the audio cuts out mid-call. Not great for depositions."

Jace popped the casing, revealing a loose connection on the main board. "Easy fix."

Patchwork: While we're here, let's add real-time transcription with a built-in keyword flag. If someone says 'guilty' or 'settlement,' it pings the host.

Jace soldered the connection, let Patchwork's spark do its work, and reassembled it. The display now showed a discreet "Keyword Monitor: Active" message.

Sterling tested it with Riley: "We might settle this case."

The phone beeped softly.

Sterling's eyes lit up. "That's… brilliant."

Payment: $150.

Patchwork: $25.50 added to Pending Taxes. Current total: $749.52.

Wealth: $2,960.75 → $3,110.75

---

Repair 2 – Document Shredder

"This thing jams constantly," Sterling said.

Jace dismantled the top, finding dull blades and a misaligned feed roller.

Patchwork: Sharpened blades, realigned rollers… and now it auto-sorts shreds into 'normal' and 'sensitive' bins based on keyword recognition. Because why not.

When they tested it, a page with "Confidential" printed on it triggered a green light and dropped into the locked bin.

Sterling laughed. "You're making me look like a genius."

Payment: $100.

Patchwork: $17.00 added to Pending Taxes. Current total: $766.52.

Wealth: $3,110.75 → $3,210.75

---

Repair 3 – Copier/Printer/Scanner

"This beast," Sterling said, "is the bane of our existence."

Jace ran diagnostics — a worn feed belt and outdated firmware.

Patchwork: New belt, firmware rewrite… and I've added a 'truth watermark' feature. If a scanned document contains altered text, it embeds a hidden mark in the PDF.

Riley raised an eyebrow. "That's… actually kind of scary."

Sterling grinned. "That's… actually kind of perfect."

Payment: $200.

Patchwork: $34.00 added to Pending Taxes. Current total: $800.52.

Wealth: $3,210.75 → $3,410.75

---

The Curveball

As they packed up, a stern-looking woman in a navy suit entered. "Sterling, can I have a word?"

She glanced at Jace and Riley. "I'm Marla Crowley. Partner."

Sterling made introductions, but Marla's eyes stayed on Jace. "I've heard about your… enhancements. Just remember, in this business, information is power. And too much power makes people nervous."

Patchwork: She's not wrong. Also, she's hiding something.

Jace kept his tone light. "I just fix things, ma'am."

Her smile didn't reach her eyes. "Of course you do."

---

The Offer

Back in the lobby, Sterling shook Jace's hand. "You've just made my month. I'll be in touch — there's plenty more around here that could use your… touch."

Patchwork: And plenty more secrets to uncover.

---

Status Update

Technician: Jace Thorn

RP Total: 270

Wealth: $3,410.75

Pending Taxes: $800.52

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