Chapter 54 - Chapter 53 - I want to break up with my cold junior colleague.

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The rhythmic sound of typing filled the office. It was mid-week after the holidays. Half past nine in the morning, perhaps a time when everyone found it easy to focus, as not a single voice could be heard. Amidst it all, I was the only one whose concentration had wavered. Lately, I found myself thinking about extraneous things quite often, even during work.

I glanced around, but no one seemed to be in the mood for a break. Which, of course, was to be expected at this hour. I picked up my phone, rose from my seat, and left the office. I figured I'd go buy a drink for a change of pace. Not from a nearby vending machine, but a convenience store or a takeout coffee from a cafe would be better. But then I wondered if it was really okay to just boldly sneak out and bring something back, yet I still found myself outside the building. As I walked towards the convenience store, a familiar figure caught my eye.

"Hey. We meet again."

"Hayama-senpai..."

It was still morning, but Hayama-senpai looked tired, holding a can of coffee. His posture, leaning against the wall of a multi-tenant building, taking a break, didn't quite fit my image of him. I had always imagined he'd take his breaks elegantly in a cafe or something.

"...Are you, by any chance, tired?"

"Well, when you're juggling a lot of responsibilities..."

From his tone, it sounded like he had other jobs in addition to the one he was working on with Senpai. Suddenly, I didn't feel like going to the convenience store anymore, so I leaned against the wall just like Hayama-senpai. I looked up at the sky, and there was a blue expanse, as if someone had brought it straight from the countryside. After that, there was no conversation. I was vaguely staring at the sky, and Hayama-senpai was staring at the road where cars came and went. Every time such idle time came, my mind wandered to unnecessary thoughts.

"Hayama-senpai."

I let my gaze fall to the sidewalk and called out to him briefly. Hayama-senpai looked at me with just his eyes.

"Do men really never forget the person they once loved?"

Even after I asked, Hayama-senpai remained silent. It wasn't that he hadn't heard me. His profile seemed to recall something, as if he was deep in thought.

"Yeah, I guess so."

A kacon sound echoed as the can of coffee hit the wall, announcing it was empty.

"Probably can't forget. No matter what the other person thinks."

His somewhat resigned voice pricked at my ears, making me regret asking such a question.

"...They're special, aren't they?"

"Well, that's just me speaking for myself," Hayama-senpai said, then peeled his back off the building wall. He tossed the empty can into a trash can and turned to face me. "Alright, I'm going now."

"Okay."

Saying that and nodding, Hayama-senpai walked past me. I didn't see him off. I just stared intently at the asphalt, scorching under the relentless sun.

—------------

It was raining from the morning that day.

"Thank you for your cooperation."

"Excuse me."

Following the section chief, I bowed my head as well, then turned on my heel on the marble-like floor. It was Friday, the weekend. A day filled with keywords that made my heart dance, yet I was out on calls with the section chief again, just my luck. Even after leaving the client's building, the rain showed no signs of letting up. My hair, which I had styled this morning, had curled up due to the humidity.

It was getting late for lunch again, and I just wanted to get back to the office quickly. As I walked, thinking that, a familiar building caught my eye. There was no way I could forget it. It was the building where I had seen Senpai and Orimoto-san together—

"Oh, Isshiki-kun?"

The section chief turned to look at me, who had stopped, giving me a curious gaze. I suppose it was understandable. I had suddenly stopped and was staring through the glass.

"Sen-pai..."

My murmured voice was swallowed by the sound of the rain. My awareness and gaze were fixed on a table in the restaurant. In front of a serious-looking Orimoto-san, Senpai was giving a wry smile, his eyes darting around.

Why were they together again? As I thought that, another part of me urged me to face reality. It wasn't about "why" anymore. Perhaps it would be better to ask, "How many times has this been?"

"Hey, Isshiki-kun?"

I wanted to pretend I hadn't seen anything and leave this place. But after seeing them so clearly, I didn't feel like I could do that.

"Section Chief."

"Y-Yes!"

"Please go on ahead. I just remembered something I need to do."

I said only that to the Section Chief, who for some reason was now speaking formally, and then headed towards the entrance of the restaurant. I couldn't care about appearances anymore. I would ask properly. Why were they contacting each other and meeting in secret? Then, I was sure, I would realize it had just been my misunderstanding—

"—Kaori Orimoto."

As I entered the restaurant and approached Senpai and Orimoto-san, Senpai's stern voice reached my ears. Unaware of my presence, Senpai was looking at Orimoto-san with serious eyes. I involuntarily stopped my steps, and the next moment, Senpai clearly said.

"Marry me."

—--------

Huh?

I desperately tried to suppress the urge to blurt that out, my mind filled with question marks. What did he just say? He wants to be together... and he said that to Orimoto-san—?

In my frozen gaze, Orimoto-san let out a soft laugh.

"Okay."

Senpai let out a sigh of relief. That sight, that fact, spread a stain darker and blacker than the rain across my heart—

"—!"

I turned on my heel and ran out of the shop the moment I exited. The rain fell, crying softly. The unbearably heavy, humid air and a heart like a discarded rag.

I ran as if escaping from all of it.

—-----

After that, I don't really remember how I got home. I was lying face down on the bed, still in my soaking wet stockings and suit.

I had sent a message saying I wasn't feeling well and was going straight home, but what did I do after that? But it didn't matter anymore. Or rather, nothing mattered anymore.

I'm such an idiot. How could I not have noticed something so simple? Now that I think about it, there were countless signs. Not just the frequent contact, but the fact that they were hiding it—I should have understood what that meant. In the end, I was just scared, couldn't believe it, and averted my eyes from the truth. I wanted to believe that Senpai was being kind because my plan had worked, and I was just deceiving myself.

"…!"

Again, the back of my nose stung, and a sob threatened to escape. Why? Why? What did I do wrong? —Only such endlessly pathetic words spun in my head. This is so unlike me. The usual me would be fuming right now, ready to make him take back what he said... But I didn't even have the energy for that now.

Click-clack, the sound of the front door opening.

I looked up at the clock; it was well into what could be called night. Standing in front of the full-length mirror, I took out foundation from my bag and quickly concealed the tear streaks. I thought it was a futile struggle, but I wanted to face Senpai, true to myself, until the very end.

"Welcome home."

"Oh, I'm back. Were you in the bedroom?"

I went to the living room and spoke to Senpai, who had just returned. Senpai put something into his suit pocket, then snapped his bag shut.

"I have something to talk about, is this a good time?"

"...Yes. I also have something to talk about."

I already knew what Senpai was going to say. I didn't know why Senpai's feelings had drifted away from me. But... I certainly had no intention of being meekly dumped like this. Because it would be too miserable. I couldn't forgive myself for getting carried away, misunderstanding, and averting my eyes from inconvenient truths. If that's the case, I want to end it with my own hands—

"—"

"Oh, really... No, it's a pretty important conversation."

"What a coincidence. I also have something important to talk about."

But Senpai wasn't going to back down easily either. We sat in chairs around the dining table, facing each other with unusually stern expressions. Senpai put his hand into his suit pocket and looked at me with an unyielding gaze.

"Ah, well, let's do this. We'll both say what we want to say at the same time. How's that?"

"It's not ideal, but..."

If we just kept stubborn here, time would just pass. I reluctantly said that and readjusted my seat. Senpai likewise shifted in front of me and straightened his back.

"Alright, then on the count of three."

"Okay."

We both took a breath in simultaneously, then exhaled.

And then.

"One, two, three—"

And everything.

"Marry me."

"Let's break up."

"Eh?"

"Huh?"

We spoke alternately, uttering opposite words—