...
After Jiraiya left the hokage building, he started wondering around the village in search of Naruto but found a lovely hot spring on his walk around.
He rubbed his hands together and said to himself "don't mind if I do" he jumped up onto the roof of the hot spring and pulled out a notebook for his artwork.
Then he started to watch the people come in and out of the hot spring and he started breathing heavily, he then went towards the women's area (or at least he thought he did) and pulled out a pen.
"Alright, let's see our future masterpiece, hopefully I find something good, my material is running a little short and so is my..." He pulled out his wallet with barely any money in and he showed a frog like expression.
Just as he was expressing his dissatisfaction about his pocket change, he heard the doors open to one of the sauna doors.
He started breathing heavily and was giggling to himself "hopefully, they have a good body, my readers have been complaining about to many small chests".
He was looking down in the sauna on the roof and he could barely see anything he muttered to himself feeling annoyed "c'mon, these owners are getting more and more clever these days".
As the fog began to clear a little he became a little more interested "oh, she has a great body, just a little more and I'll be able to see it better hehehe".
He started drawing and writing the three sizes and he was blushing furiously just as the fog begun to clear even more his blush stopped and he became a little disgusted, and he almost threw up.
"Huh? 'gurgle' blughhhh" Jiraiya was so confused right now, he threw up and fell backwards and he muttered "what happened, where is this, who am I".
What Jiraiya saw as the fog began to fade was a hairy ass from an old man, which sent him into self doubt about life "is god playing a trick on me, and is punishing me for being improper".
Jiraiya was quickly caught by the owner of the hot springs and was dragged out of the place, before being thrown onto the floor.
The old sauna owner had a disgusted face towards Jiraiya and he said to Jiraiya before before walking back inside "to think the rumors about you seeing women in baths was a lie, I have a new understanding of who you really watch now".
Jiraiya fumbled up from the ground and he heard the old man's disapproval and misunderstanding words, "ahh, wait, it isn't like that, I thought I was in the women's area".
The old man didn't care about his nonsense and waved his hand to shoo away Jiraiya "yeah yeah you like women".
Jiraiya breathed a sigh of relief but froze upon seeing the old man's nonchalant manner "wait a sec, you don't believe me at all do you" Jiraiya grabbed the old man by his collar.
And the old man blushed while twiddling his fingers "please be gentle, no, what I meant was I like women".
Jiraiya quickly let go of the old man feeling like his hands were tarnished with unholy water and he quickly started screaming before running away.
The old man that was thrown to the ground stood up and dusted himself off and he said to the fleeing Jiraiya "your welcome to come over anytime!".
"Hmph, it works every time" he muttered and the old man continued to stare seriously at the fleeing Jiraiya and he shook his head and continued to speak to himself "hopefully that'll stop him from coming here again" before heading back into the hot spring.
Jiraiya finally made it as far away as possible from that repulsive place, he was seen by a river cleansing his hands, that touched the old man.
You could hear him muttering the same words over and over "I've been tainted, I've been tainted".
"Hey, pervy sage what are you doing here" Jiraiya who was mumbling to himself turned towards the sound and saw Naruto.
He ran over to Naruto and started shaking him while crying "Naruto!, I've been tainted, I need your sexy jutsu to cleanse meeee".
Naruto who was being strangled by the old perv who started choking him "pervy sage, I can't breathe, I can't..", he was turning blue until he finally pushed the old man away, with a little struggle.
After some time of calming Jiraiya down.
Naruto: now, can you tell me what's the problem.
Jiraiya: these hands held something unholy and these eyes saw something mortifying.
Naruto squinted his eyes with interest and asked Jiraiya for specific's.
Jiraiya: these hands held a man who enjoys other men 'sniff' 'sniff', and these eyes, these eyes saw...
Naruto: just be out with it already!.
Jiraiya started screaming again with slight fear and disgust "aghhhh! These eyes saw a man's hairy ass!.
Naruto who heard this squinted his face and Jiraiya didn't know what he was thinking until, Naruto who was squinting his eyes, had a twitching face before.
"Hahahahaha" he pointed his finger at Jiraiya and fell to the ground laughing his ass off, causing Jiraiya to want to beat him a new image.
Jiraiya: aghhh! Alright, enough! I don't want to hear it anymooorrreee!.
Jiraiya kicked Naruto on his ass sending him flying and he scoffed "hmph, that'll teach you".
.
In kuraiya's home.
.
"Hmmm" shizuka stirred awake in a completely new environment and she just stared blankly at her surroundings and she was thinking [where is this, heaven].
'thud'
She turned towards the sound that dropped something and saw kuraiya staring at her with a large amount of food in his arms and on the floor.
The staring lasted quite a while before kuraiya broke the silence "you hungry" while pointing to the food.
She ignored him and replied with confusion "where is this".
Kuraiya scratched his head and started eating from the pile in a casual manner and replied "my place, I moved your stuff already, after all, I did claim you".
Shizuka: what?
...