*** Ayden's Bedroom | ZIEKS POV!!
*** Saturday
When I woke up, I'd almost forgotten what had happened the night before. My eyes blinked open as I felt my head begin to throb. Man, I didn't even drink that much last night. I looked over to Ayden, who laid beside me a few inches away. He snored quietly, shifting slightly in his sleep. I remembered what he had said to me, about being my fake boyfriend.... it was all so risky. Would anyone even fall for it? More importantly, would Phoenix fall for it? I sat up, rubbing my eyes a bit as I took a look around Aydens room. I'd barely even processed the fact I was actually in here, and sitting right next to him.
My eyes scanned across the room to the various band posters and drawings hung up on the walls. He had piles of clothes scattered across his room, along with his skateboard which was propped up against the dresser near his door. His room had a faint scent of weed that clung in the air.
I wasn't sure how much time had passed before I heard Ayden's voice coming from beside me, still laid back against his pillow. It had that same raspiness I always admired, which made me blush a little.
"You could've woke me up, sweaters."
My voice caught a bit at the nickname, a smile appearing across my face as I rolled my eyes playfully. "Still calling me that, huh?" I turned to face him, crossing my legs.
He moved to sit up, pressing his back up against the bedframe. "Of course. It definitely has a ring to it, doesn't it?" He moved a strand of his messy purple hair away from his eyes, glancing over to me. "Anyway... I've been wondering," He pauses for a moment as if he's thinking about how to word it. "What happened with Phoenix last night?"
His words hang in the air for a long moment, spiraling around my head. After a second Ayden adds, "I'm sorry, it's really not my business... I guess I'm just... worried."
I bit my lip, looking down at my hands. "It's not that I don't want to tell you, it's just that I don't know if I should..." I sigh, taking a deep breath before meeting his worried gaze again. "I don't know what's going on with him, but I know one thing for certain: he's not going to just let this go."
*** Monday | 1 week later | Locker room
It had already been a week, a week of pretending, a week of secrets.... a week of glares from Phoenix, who hadn't taken his eyes off of either of us since the party. Ayden and I of course hadn't done anything serious, especially in crowded places. We mostly just stuck to the locker room shenanigans. Just enough to get under Phoenix's skin, to keep him away. For how crazy a scenario we were in, the drama was kept to a minimum throughout the week, which made every encounter feel more uneasy.
I could tell Phoenix was becoming restless. Knowing him, I knew he'd want solid evidence, and would do whatever it took to get it. It was already the end of fourth period, and as usual Ayden was by my side, closer than normal as we walked into the locker room. It had been a routine by now— being close to him. It almost felt real. Obviously, I knew it wasn't, but I keep telling myself not to fall for him even more than I already have.
Ayden was a bit too good at pretending. So good at it that everything he said or did felt too good to be true— which I guess was the point. My heart ached everytime his fingers brushed against mine, the eye contact he'd give me when Phoenix was around, the closeness... it was almost too much for me to handle. We hadn't told any of our friends. I hadn't even told Dakota, the only one closest to me besides Ayden. I had a feeling she was catching on slowly, but Skyler had her more distracted as of lately. I think they had started their own thing, maybe at the party, but she hadn't told anyone anything official yet.
I took a deep breath as I opened my locker to get my clothes, Ayden was planted beside me doing the same. Phoenix's gaze never left our direction, as if he was just waiting and watching for anything to happen. Something to make him say, 'Hah, see you don't actually like him like that.' Ayden glanced up, noticing the wandering eyes from Phoenix. I'd just taken my shirt off, not paying attention to them until Ayden suddenly wrapped his arm around my bare waist, causing me to jolt slightly. I looked up at him curiously, feeling heat rush up to my cheeks.
There wasn't many people in the locker room anymore, which was probably the only reason Ayden was being so open about it. I guess something got under Phoenix's skin cause he walked up, slamming his hand against a locker causing both of us to snap our heads to his direction.
"Why don't you just kiss already? You guys haven't even held hands. What, you grab his waist and stare into his eyes? Do you even like him?" He scoffs, crossing his arms across his chest as he grits his teeth together.
Ayden didn't let go of me, in fact he held me closer than ever. "Why the hell do you care about what we do? It's none of your goddamn business." Ayden's voice was cold, and sharp enough to cut glass.
Phoenix looked away for a moment as if he was thinking about what to say next. "You don't like him. I know you don't."
I felt my heart drop, as I looked down at the ground. I couldn't bare to meet anyone's eyes. He was right after all. He didn't. When I finally looked back up, Ayden's gaze was on mine. His eyes sparkling with curiosity. He turned to look towards Phoenix again, smirking slightly before I heard his words slip out.
"You want me to prove it so bad? I'll show you."
He looked at me, his eyes trailing down to my lips before back to my eyes. I wasn't exactly sure of the plan here, or if this was something he should even be considering.
"Ayde—" I opened my mouth to speak, but before I could get anything out, Ayden leaned down, hesitating slightly before I felt his lips press against mine. They lingered there longer than expected, long enough for me to realize what was happening. His lips were warm and soft against mine, I could feel my heart pounding against my chest. When he pulled away, I looked away quickly, trying to hide the blush spreading across my face. My legs felt like jello, as if I'd collapse at any moment.
Phoenix didn't say anything. There was nothing else to say really. He couldn't prove it wasn't real, there wasn't anything he could do about it. He stormed away, mumbling under his breath. When he was gone, Ayden turned towards me. The silence was loud.
"I'm sorry I did that so suddenly.... I just— didn't know what else would make him shut up." Ayden turned away slightly as I finished getting dressed.
I could barely hear him over the thumping of my heartbeat inside of my ears. "I-it's okay. He's relentless..." My voice shook slightly as I spoke, looking up at him once again.
Ayden stayed facing away from me, his hands stuffed in the front pockets of his jeans. I wonder what's going through his head right now. I pulled my backpack over my shoulder, grabbing my guitar case as I started to walk towards the door, turning my head to look back at him.
"Y-you comin?" My voice cracked when I spoke. Ayden gave me a nod, walking over to me, putting his arm across my shoulders.
"Always."
*** Cafeteria
Everyone was already at the table when we walked into the cafeteria, eating and talking amongst themselves. Dakota perked up when she saw us, giving me the same curious look she'd been doing all week when she saw Ayden glued to my side. Skyler was beside her, rhythmically tapping her drumsticks on the table. She looked up and smiled when she noticed us sit down across the table.
I felt Kota's foot kick me from underneath the table, not enough to hurt but enough to get my attention. I looked over at her as she mouthed the words, 'We need to talk.' I was never a fan of those words, but I knew this couldn't be avoided forever. I nodded a little bit, pulling out my phone before putting both Ayden and Dakota into a groupchat with me.
E:Hey, we all need to talk about something important, can you both meet me in the parking lot after school and go home with me when my mom picks me up?
D:you betcha
A:i'll be there
The rest of lunch went better than expected, it almost felt normal again for once. When the bell rang for fifth period to start, both Ayden and I stood up, starting to walk towards my class. Kota and Skyler followed behind us. They had been walking to class together pretty much everyday since the party.
*** Music class
Ayden stopped by the doorway, turning to face me. Then without warning, he pulled me into a hug, leaning down so his head was close to my ear. I shivered slightly, feeling his hot breath against my skin. I opened my mouth to speak, but no words came out. After a moment, Ayden's voice softly speaks up, loud enough for only me to hear.
"Play it cool, Phoenix is watching..."
I tensed up slightly at the mention of his name, moving my arms to wrap around Ayden's waist. I kept my head down, my ear pressed up against his chest— just like it had been once before, the first time we met. The smell of his cologne was intoxicating. I tried to focus on his heartbeat, my eyes watching as Phoenix walked down the hall to his class.
Ba dum Ba dum Ba dum
It was only a hug after all, not like anyone would question much, right? I pulled away once Phoenix was out of sight before looking up at Ayden. "Thanks... for walking me to class, emo boy." I teased a little. Part of me wish I never had to let go, I just wanted him to hold me for just a little longer.
"No need to thank me, sweaters." He starts to walk off when the bell rings, before turning back around to say one final thing. "See you after school."
I made my way to my seat, head racing from all the madness today. I mean, I haven't been able to think clearly since the locker room scenario. Ayden actually kissed me— and in front of Phoenix himself. It wasn't like the first time, hidden away— in a school bathroom, never to talk about, but to always think and cringe about. So much for a romantic first kiss.
This was getting a lot more serious and I can't help but wonder what's going through Ayden's head. Is this something he truly wants to do...? He's risking all of this just so one guy will stay off of my back? What's his reason? I kept tossing back and forth different reasons and scenarios that could make him want to do this, but nothing can ever satisfy the curiosity, and nobody but Ayden knew the truth.
I sighed, flipping through the music packet to the song me and Skyler were performing together. We still had quite a bit of time until it was due which kept my mind a little at ease. It was hard to focus on anything besides the racing thoughts I kept having of Ayden and Phoenix. Skyler took notice of my absentminded expression. She looked at me, setting her drumsticks down.
"Hey.. you okay?" She asked me in her usual timid voice.
I looked up at her, still gripping onto my guitar. I blushed a little, embarrassed for zoning out for so long, then I gave her a small nod. "Y-yeah, I just have a lot on my mind.
My fingers slid against the guitar strings, getting back into position. I started to play the beginning cords of the song, Skyler joining in on the drums after a few moments. We'd learned about a quarter of the song together, close to half. When the bell rang I carefully put my guitar back into its case, latching it shut. As I made my way towards the door, Skyler followed behind, clutching her drumsticks.
"Hey, Ziek." She gave me a warm smile. "Um.. I just wanted to say thanks for introducing me to everybody..." She tucked a piece of her hair behind her ear. "Everyone's been really nice to me!"
I smiled, looking over to her. "No worries, Sky. I'm just glad you're feeling like a part of the group." I stop before I reach the hallway towards my next period.
Skyler stands beside me, fiddling with her drumsticks. "I'm glad we get to work together for Mr. Erickson's class.." Her voice trails off as she looks around the hall. "I should probably head to class. See you tomorrow Ziek!"
I waved to her as I started to walk down the hall, dragging my feet along the tiled floor.
Time to see Phoenix.... again.
*** Math
It wasn't until Mrs. Dobson called attendance that I realized Phoenix wasn't even in the classroom. My head immediately snapped up, looking towards his empty seat. I felt a sense of relief as I let out a small sigh. At least it was one less thing to worry about. Although, even with his absence I felt anxious, as if he'd never been gone at all. Mrs. Dobson passed out worksheets for the class to complete before the end of the period. I was about halfway done. By the time class was over I'd finished and turned in the worksheet, grabbing my things before heading towards the parking lot.
***
Dakota and Ayden were already outside and standing underneath a tree near the parking lot. I headed my way over to them, gripping the handle of my guitar case. Mom was parked in her usual spot, not too far away. We walked towards the car before getting inside.
*** Home
The drive home was mostly quiet, up until we reached the driveway. When we got inside, I headed towards my room, Ayden and Dakota following behind me.
"You're welcome to stay for supper if you'd like, you two." My mom hints at the both of them, a warm smile across her face.
Once inside my bedroom, Ayden sunk into the bean bag in the corner of my room, whilst Kota sat criss crossed on my bed next to me. There was a moment of silence before I took a deep breath, letting out a breathy sigh. I could tell she was waiting for me to start talking. Her eyes were on me, watching as they always did, curiously. I still can't tell either of them the full.... truth. It made me feel guilty.
"I... um," I cleared my throat, looking towards Kota. "Okay, look. So like you know Phoenix won't leave me alone right?" I paused as I waited for her to nod. "Welllll, Ayden and I came up with a plan to fake date until he leaves me alone."
Saying all of it out loud made it sound even crazier than I thought. Her face said it all. Confusion mixed with curiosity, and a hint of worry.
"If you guys are really doing this... then you better make it believable—"
"Already got that covered. He saw us kiss in the locker room today." Ayden chimed in from across the room, smirking confidently.
My heart stuttered. "U-um y-yeah... he kind of didn't show up last period either." I scratched the back of my head nervously.
Kota's eyes widened as she covered her mouth, letting out a gasp. "No way!! It's definitely getting to him." She turned towards Ayden. "Also I thought you were straight Ayden?" She asked, tilting her head slightly.
"I am, but it's worth the risk if it'll make Ez's life easier." He shrugs, smirking again. "And like I told him before, I don't care what people think of me."
I felt myself blushing again, when I knew I shouldn't. I just couldn't wrap my head around why he'd do something so drastic for me. Two hours had passed before my mom would knock on the door, cracking it open.
"Supper's ready!"
None of us wasted any time to sit at the table, waiting as my mom passed out the plates to everyone. Dakota had to leave shortly after dinner so when her dad arrived Ayden and I walked her outside, stopping a few steps away from her dad's car. She turned to face us.
I gave her a hug, whispering, "Please don't tell anyone."
She smiled as she pulled back, pantomiming zipping her mouth shut with her fingers and throwing away the invisible key as she nodded. "Your secret is safe with me."
Before I pulled away, I had something festering in the back of my mind, wondering— curious. "So... what's with you and Sky? You've been extra close lately." I chuckled a little but I kept my voice low as she faced me, cheeks flushed slightly with embarrassment.
"Wellll.... nothing official yet, but we've admitted to liking each other." She whispered, covered her face with her hands as she peeked at me through the spaces between her fingers. "Oh- Ziek, can I tell Sky about this? I'm not sure if I'd be good at keeping a secret from her..." She asked nervously, cocking her head to the side.
My gaze turned towards Ayden who shrugged and then simply said, "I don't care."
"Sure Kota, just make sure she knows not to tell anyone about it. If anything, I want you all to just act like nothing's different."
Suddenly, Kota's dad honked the horn before rolling down the window, rock music blaring from inside the car. "C'mon Dakota, we ain't got all night. You'll see your friends tomorrow." His voice was deep and gravely, loud enough to be heard over the thumping music. In his hand was a cigarette, pinched snuggly between his index and middle finger.
Dakota sighed softly, nodding before giving us both a small smile. "See you guys tomorrow." She turned towards the car before stepping inside, waving at us as her dad drove away.
Ayden and I stood there for a couple of minutes before I felt Ayden's eyes staring into me.
"You sure you really wanna do all of this..? I don't want any of this shit to ruin our friendship." I paused, keeping my head forward. "I mean... this isn't just fun and games anymore. He saw us... kiss. He could tell anyone... if he wanted."
Ayden's hand rested against my shoulder, giving it a gentle and reassuring squeeze. "Then let him. He's gonna do whatever he wants anyway, we don't have control over him." He moves to stand beside me now, his arm falling to his side. "Besides all we can do is control ourselves, and yeah, I do want to do this. It was my idea and I meant what I said, I'm gonna be here to help you, in any way that I can." His voice didn't hesitate, not even for a moment. "Unless you don't want to anymore, it's your say over mine Ez."
His words stay in the back of my head, tucked away, just waiting for the right moment to spark the idea in my head to end this whole fake boyfriend thing. Not yet, but soon.
"Just until he gets off my— OUR backs and forgets about us." My stomach churned a little as I took a deep breath. "What if people start asking questions? What about your cousin? Won't he be wondering what's going on with us, or rather... you?"
Ayden let out a small chuckle. "Tell them what you wanna tell 'em, dating or not people will believe anything with enough confidence. And if my cousin asks, I'll tell him the plan, and he won't say shit to anyone. He's so preoccupied playing video games I doubt he'll even notice." He ruffled the back of my head, making me blush a little. "You worry too much, sweaters."
I couldn't help but smile, giving him a playful shove. "Well, someone has to, emo boy."
*** Ayden's house | AYDEN'S POV!!
It was around 8:00pm when Ez and his mom dropped me off, 8:37 when I finally stepped inside the house, or at least the hollow shell that resembled one. As usual— on most nights my dad sat reclined back in his chair, beer gripped firmly in his hand. His eyes didn't leave the screen as I started to walk passed to get toward my room.
"Where're you been?" His voice slurred, grumbling something at the TV before taking a swig of the beer.
"Um, just at my friends house. Hung out after school and—"
"Yeah, yeah, whatever. What'd I say about talking to me when the game is on?" He waved his hand dismissively, which cued me to buzz off.
Don't know why I even entertained the idea of him caring in the first place. I kept walking towards my room, my eyes drifting towards Sienna. She stood leaned over the island of the kitchen, swirling a glass of wine in her hand before taking a small sip, looking up at me. She was nice enough despite her current situation— a closed off step son with no interest of getting close to her, and a distant alcoholic husband who lost his wife five years prior. She knew what she signed up for getting into this family, but still I wondered what made her stick around in the first place.
"Hey, how was school?" She asked under her breath, setting the glass of wine on the countertop. "Dinner's in the fridge if you're hungry... lasagna."
"I already ate at my friends house, but thanks." I kept it short, my eyes darting back to the glass on the counter before I walked down the hallway towards my bedroom, closing the door and locking it once I was inside.
Fuck, I need to smoke.
I quickly kicked a few piles of clothes in front of the door, blocking the crack underneath it. I moved towards the window, cracking it open before pulling out a neatly rolled joint wedged between a gap on the windowsill. I sat on the edge of my bed, joint tucked between my fingers as I lit the end, taking a few puffs before exhaling out the window. I pulled my phone out, going straight to my camera roll. I scrolled for a while, puffing on the joint— stopping once a certain picture caught my eye. I let out a sigh, chuckling a little under my breath.
"Man, if you knew what I was doing right now you'd probably call me an idiot." I paused, feeling a lump form in my throat. "In a way, I guess it's my own dumb way of making it up to you." I shut the screen off, tossing my phone beside me, taking another long drag from the joint, putting it out against the windowsill. After a while of laying on my back staring up at the ceiling, I drifted off into a deep sleep.
*** Dreaming
Incoherent laughter coming from beside me.
"Dudeee! You should've seen your face!"
"Whatever, you didn't even scare me... that bad.." I mumbled, arms crossed over my chest.
I shifted in my sleep.
*next dream sequence*
"Wait up! I said I was sorry!" I panted, reaching out.
"You said you'd always be there, but you're not. You're... never here anymore. I don't even know what's going on with you anymore. You never talk to me..."
"Look I'm sorry okay? You're not the only one with problems." My words slip out without thinking, hanging heavy in the air.
I shift again, curling up on my side.
*next dream sequence*
"Ayden... what happened wasn't your fault. Things just... happen sometimes, and you can't control them."
"I know it's hard but don't blame yourself, you've been through a lot."
*end of dream sequence*
When I woke up, the collar of my t-shirt was drenched in sweat. My eyes scanned the room, stopping on the window. The moon was just in view, peaking out from behind a couple of trees. I sat up, grabbing my phone from beside me, checking the time. 2:32am.
Shit... I fell asleep early.
*four new messages*
Ez ➤ 3 hours ago
E:Hey, you awake? I'm starting to have doubts about this... plan. Idk Ayden, I just feel bad for you being in this situation.
E: I can't get it off my mind. I feel guilty in a way- keeping secrets and making lies up to prevent the inevitable... I mean I know we told Kota, but there's just so much at stake right now.
E: I mean fuck, my mom doesn't even know I'm gay. Let alone most of the school... I doubt Phoenix will tell anyone about... the kiss, but he's unpredictable. Even if he does though, I doubt anyone will believe it.
E: Ah... sorry for the spam... you're probably asleep, but I'm just worried Ayden. What if this backfires?"
It took me a moment to respond as I contemplated what I should say.
A: we can stop any time u want, i just want u to be okay
A: also, it's alright, u didn't force me into this. here, if it'll make u feel better, u can call the shots from now on
A: starting today, whatever u wanna do i'll go along with it, and if I don't wanna do somethin you'll know bc i won't do it.. that way if u feel like ur forcing me to do something 'i don't want' you'll know for sure
I plugged my charger into my phone and placed it on my desk, laying back down onto my back.
I wonder if this is too much stress on him...