-AKARI'S POINT OF VIEW-
-FLASHBACK-
The children's laughter echoed in the humid summer air.
"Catch me if you can!"
"Come on, chase me!"
They screamed, their bright sneakers kicking up dust as they ran in circles around the playground.
I watched them, standing by the rusted fence with my arms crossed, sweat sticking my hair to my cheek.
Tsk. I wonder why they find it so entertaining, I thought, turning away. The sun was too bright, the noise too loud. Thank goodness I don't have to waste my time with them.
I repeated to myself, It's better to be alone, after all.
The bell rang, jolting me from my thoughts. It was time for economics, a class I didn't care about. I shuffled into the room with the other kids, clutching my chemistry notes close to my chest like they were a shield.
I took my usual seat in the back corner, beside the cracked window that smelled of rust and dust. I liked this spot because no one would bother to look at me here.
The teacher droned on, writing terms and numbers I barely understood on the board, while I doodled molecular structures in the margins of my notebook.
"Akari, can you solve the second problem?"
I froze, the chalk clacking to a stop as all eyes turned to me.
I stood, my legs heavy, and walked to the board. I stared at the numbers and letters, but they might as well have been another language. My mind blanked, my throat tightened.
Behind me, a boy snickered.
"Teacher, don't waste your time with that creep. She doesn't know anything but stupid chemistry."
Laughter erupted in the room, a wave crashing over me, drowning me.
"Creep."
"She's crying again."
"Whiner."
I felt hot tears rolling down my cheeks, falling onto the chalk tray, smearing the dust.
"Enough, class." The teacher's voice was stern but tired. "It's wrong to ridicule others. Akari, try paying attention in class next time. Chemistry isn't the only subject that matters."
I nodded, unable to speak, my vision blurry as I returned to my seat.
The bell rang again. School was over.
I held my 33rd chemistry book close as I walked down the cracked sidewalk, the cicadas screaming in the trees.
At least chemistry won't betray me, I thought.
"Look, there she is."
Three kids—two girls and a boy—walked behind me, whispering and giggling.
They caught up. The boy kicked at my heel, making me stumble.
"Who do you think you are, huh?" one of the girls sneered. "Reading all those books, you think you're better than us?"
"Maybe she's planning to poison the whole class," the other girl giggled.
"Or maybe she thinks she's Einstein." The boy laughed.
They shoved me, spit at me, tore the cover of my book. My knees scraped the concrete, but I didn't make a sound, even as tears fell.
"You're such a whiner."
"Pathetic."
"Trash."
I curled into myself, letting the blows come, until I heard an adult's voice shouting. The kids scattered.
A kind-looking man bent down. "Are you okay, dear?"
He was with a girl in a messy ponytail.
I stood and ran, leaving the pieces of my book behind.
When I neared home, I saw Akane—my little sister, in the yard, practicing with her toy bow and arrow, her black hair tied in a messy ponytail.
"Do you need big sister's help?" I called softly.
Her face lit up when she heard me, but then her eyes widened in horror as she saw my bruises.
"Big sis... who did this to you?" Akane's small fists clenched. "I'll kill them! I'll kill them with torture!"
"Akane, shh—"
But it was too late.
Mother, Aiko, stepped out, her sharp eyes narrowing.
"Who did this to you, Akari?" she demanded, her voice cold. "You know our family's standing in Tokyo, don't you? People can't just treat you this way."
Father, Ryoichi, stepped beside her, silent but furious.
"It's pitiful that you're being bullied despite being from a powerful family. Truly disappointing." Aiko's words cut deeper than the bruises.
Tears blurred my vision again. I turned and ran into the house, locking my door before collapsing onto the futon.
Midnight.
The moonlight leaked through the thin curtains as I sat on the floor, hugging my knees.
Am I truly so weak?
I suppose so, I thought, tears dripping onto my scratched hands.
In a haze of pain, I found a razor blade, pressing it against my wrist. A thin line of red welled up, hot and stinging.
This is proof that I exist, I thought.
Everyone was asleep. I put on a hat, sunglasses, and a mask, hiding my face. The streets were empty, the wind cold against my skin.
I reached the old bridge near the river, the lights reflecting in the water below.
I climbed onto the railing, looking down.
If I disappear, no one will care.
"You know, someone will end up sadder than you if you jump."
A voice.
I turned, startled, to see a girl around my age standing behind me, her hands in her pockets, her long hair tied back with a red ribbon.
"What do you want from me?" I snapped, my voice muffled by the mask.
She tilted her head. "May I ask you a question, Akari?"
"How do you know my name?" My hands trembled.
She smiled softly. "Let's have a sincere conversation, please. I don't like that look in your eyes."
"It doesn't matter," I spat. "Whatever your reason, it's unnecessary."
"I'll let you jump if you give me two minutes of your time," she said.
"I don't need your permission."
"Please." Her voice cracked. "If you jump now, I'll regret it for the rest of my life."
I sighed, stepping down from the railing.
"Fine. Two minutes."
She grinned, her eyes watery. "I'm Abe Fuyutsuki. Nice to meet you."
"Get to the point. You're wasting time."
"Have you ever wondered what the point of life is?" she asked.
"Life is the worst thing there is," I muttered.
"Really? I think life is the best."
I stared at her. "That's just your opinion."
She rocked on her heels. "What happened, Akari? What brought you here tonight?"
"It's not your concern."
"It's okay, you can tell me."
"Why should I?"
She pulled something from her pocket. "I'll give you one of my mochi if you tell me."
I froze.
Mochi... my favorite.
I sat beside her on the bench by the bridge, unwrapping the soft rice cake as I began to speak.
"It's stupid," I said.
"No story is stupid," she replied.