The magpies were chirping outside today.
Zi Hua leaned against the windowsill, admiring the way their indigo feathers glistened and changed colours under the sun. Her right eyelid had been twitching ever since she woke up, but watching the birds of happiness made her feel calmer. Maybe it was a coincidence.
The air felt fresher than usual, too, and she sucked in a deep breath to stay sharp. This had become her daily routine for awhile now: eat, sleep, read, and occasionally daydream while birdwatching. Sometimes, she secretly did some strength training in her bedchamber to quench boredom; other times, when she was too lazy to lift a finger, she actively wondered what to debate... with herself.
"What have I come to?" Zi Hua sighed.
But deep down, this weariness was familiar. She had experienced it many times after Tian had left Xiping. What had Jiu'er called it again?
'Ah, mindless pining.'
"Mistress, the weather is nice today. Why don't you take a walk in the imperial gardens?" Chun'er suggested.
At her words, Zi Hua shifted her listless posture, but remained sitting. Her rejection was palpable.
Ever since the "great disciplinary action" the other day, the eastern chamber servants had cleaned up their act, and she had also uncovered a fatal flaw in her leadership—favouritism.
Thus, in the spirit of good faith, as well as to foster a united front and calm living environment, she started giving the second-rank servants more customised chores, increasing their opportunities to present themselves before her.
"Would you like to visit the imperial archives instead?" Chun'er pressed, determined to evoke a response. "There are thousands of books there. Military ones included."
Her plan seemed to be working too well, though.
She shook her head. "I don't feel like going outdoors."
"Mistress, do you feel unwell? Shall I get an imperial physician?"
'Is fear of socialising an illness?' Zi Hua pondered. 'Hmm... A question for another day.'
It was too much of a hassle to explain her aversion to meeting the other consorts more than necessary. All her interactions with them had been more trouble than they were worth so far, and going out was a sure-fire way to encounter unwanted drama.
"No need. I haven't slept well these past few nights, that's all," she lied.
'She'll take the hint this time, right?'
"What a coincidence! I made a jasmine-scented fragrance sachet yesterday," Chun'er chirped—obliviousness, or disregard? "It helps with insomnia, so—"
"Actually, mistress is allergic to jasmine," Yue'er interjected, entering the bedchamber with a bundle of freshly-picked plum blossoms. "Thanks for covering me. I'll take over now."
"Oh. I-I'll take my leave, then..." Chun'er said reluctantly.
When Zi Hua didn't stop her, she pouted and brushed past Yue'er.
"You're just in time, Yue'er," Zi Hua groaned. I was running out of excuses to stay indoors."
"That's not like you, mistress. You used to find any excuse to frolic outdoors," Yue'er commented while mutitasking.
"Our circumstances are different now. It's safer in our little territory."
Rustle...
Yue'er paused in the middle of replacing a wilted plum blossom.
Her mistress looked different today. More reserved, lethargic, and... sadder.
When did this change occur? Why had she not noticed until now?
She put down the flowers and sat beside Zi Hua, touching her hand. "Miss... If something is bothering you, please share your worries with me. Seeing you like this... it hurts my heart."
Zi Hua opened her mouth, but the words lodged in her throat.
Something bothering her?
It couldn't be... Apart from the the imperial kitchens who ignored her complaints, nobody here bothered her. It was as if she had become an invisible mouth to feed, blending into the role of a minor Noble Beauty.
Yet, her heart felt empty, like something was missing. And all day, every day, this emptiness spread, gnawing at her insides.
She wanted it to stop. She wanted to stop it.
'But how?'
Silence spoke louder than words.
Yue'er sighed and stood up. "It's alright, mistress. When you feel ready to confide, I will always be by your side."
Zi Hua grasped her hand to stop her from slipping away.
"Thank you, Yue'er," she said gratefully. "I... I really appreciate your offer, but it's something I must overcome alone."
"Hmm..." Suddenly, Yue'er's face lit up. "I know just the thing to cheer you up!"
The topic shift took Zi Hua by surprise. "What?"
Yue'er winked cheekily. "It's a surprise. I'll be back soon!"
"Be careful!" she hollered as Yue'er dashed outside.
She doubted she heard her. Just like that, Zi Hua was alone again.
It was quiet, tranquil.
Nobody was bossing her around; lording expectations and traditions over her head; demanding more than she could provide...
She may be in the rear palace, but she was free. Freer than the other imperial consorts.
Wasn't this her wish on her first day here?
No invitations to unwanted gatherings, no unwanted visitors, and no emperor.
She'd gotten the peaceful life she wanted, so why...
Why did she feel... lonely?
***
The rear palace was usually less hectic at the Wei hour. Around this time, most imperial consorts would have finished luncheon and started napping, and their servants would be allowed a moment of reprieve. As for those who worked in the Six Bureaus—they had less reason to run errands at a time when a small ruckus would disturb the resting mistresses.
Besides, ever since the weather got hotter near the end of spring, few would linger on the unshaded, official paths in the afternoon. This made the one walking in the middle of the main path with a spring in her step especially conspicuous...
Yue'er hummed under her breath as she left the imperial kitchens, carrying a three-layered lunchbox in both arms.
It only took one heated argument, flipping over two plates of rotten vegetables, and a generous chunk of her savings to obtain a delicious high tea for mistress.
'Hopefully she'll enjoy the glutinous rice cakes,' Yue'er thought, taking extra care to walk steadily so the rabbit-shaped cakes wouldn't go out of shape.
Just then, she spotted a pink palanquin approaching, surrounded by six servants. She quickly stepped to the side and knelt, waiting for the palanquin to pass first.
Strangely, it slowed to a stop in front of her instead.
Puzzled, Yue'er raised her head slightly, and the passenger's face came into view.
Her breath hitched.
'Concubine Lin?'
***
The magpies were gone.
The midday sun hung high in the cloudless sky, and Zi Hua had long since moved from the window to the table. After flipping another page without actually reading the content, she closed the book in exasperation.
When Qiu'er passed by, she beckoned her in. "Have you seen Yue'er?"
"Come to think of it, I haven't seen her since she went to the imperial kitchens last shichen..." Qiu'er hissed in a cold breath. "Mistress, I'll go look for her—"
"Mistress! Mistress! Head Eunuch Ming is here!" Chun'er yelled, bursting into the room.
Her panic shocked Zi Hua and Qiu'er.
Something was wrong.
Zi Hua barely got to her feet before the emperor's personal attendant entered. His normally friendly face was set as hard as stone, and his tone was deathly grave:
"Noble Beauty Yang, your presence is ordered at Crystal Palace immediately."