Wait what! I thought he was an innocent, naive kid.
"Huh!" He sighed "They are seriously so stupid. I mean they beleive everybody has superpowers, idiots I mean obviously only superheroes have super power."
He started stating in a confidence only five year olds can have.
"I mean." He went on "Rekha said that her brother lost a tooth so he placed it under his pillow and the next day he found money because a rat brought it in exchange for the tooth that's so stupid only toothfairy can do that not a random mouse."
I just give Vaishanvi a look and both of us burst out laughing this kid thinks he is more genius than his classmates because they beleive in mouse bringing money in exchange of the tooth and he believes it was the tooth fairy. Kids!
"Rahul said moon comes in night because the sun was tired, so childish, everybody knows sun's shift ends and moon comes in for his."
What! Five year old logic is equal to no logic at all. He went on and on about it saying dragons don't hide they convert themselves into lizards, birds can fly not because they know magic but because they can walk on air and what not. Meanwhile Vaishnavi and I were dying laughing. The more we laughed the more his confidence grew. That's so hilarious! Whenever I think about it I crack up like a maniac.
Soon, they went back home. Nice neighbours a polite girl and a little scholar who can probably enlighten the world (lighten up the world by making them laugh) with his immense knowledge.
*************
So it was around 1:45 when Moksh came in through the front door. Despite being in the same school the timings for us were different. His classes starts an hour later than mine and ends an hour later too. Sometimes his class would be dismissed with mine.
"Sis you gotta know what happened in our class today!" He came excited as usual.
Apparently something always happened in his class that I definitely needed to know and he needed to tell even before he got his shoes off.
"So our English class was going on, I was happily sleeping and then I heard this scream that could probably freeze the whole world." He said while untieing his shoes. "I got up and saw two monkeys very large in size just wandering in the hallways and they entered our class. All the kids kept on running here and there the monkeys stole two lunch boxes before the guards took them away."
He kept on telling me how big the monkeys were and how they stole the lunchboxes.
I told him about our new neighbours. He seemed quite excited to meet them. After sometime our elder brother joined me after being home from college with his own stories to share. The three of us just went on and on. It's on moments like these that I feel as if I belong and I realise how I am the luckiest person alive.
Rest of the day went on as usual. At 8:00 we sat down to have dinner. Than the usual family chats began. Papa was saying something about what job would suit me.
"I think an engineer would be fine."
"No, I am gonna be the engineer soon." Said my bro
"Oh then she can be a doctor." Jumped in my other brother
"No she is too soft for that."
"Maybe a teacher would be just fine."
"How will she handle the pressure."
"How about a professor."
"Not a bad one."
"On second thought college students can be quite chaotic to handle."
"Seems like no job suits you."
"What were in your past life anyway.?"
"I feel rather sleepy." I said in a not so confident voice. And quietly went in my room, sitting on my chair facing the window I tried escaping from this reality. But the only thing I thought was I can't let them know. I just can't. I act like the sweetest daughter ever. Trying to erase who I once was I killed for a living. I killed people! I - I have murdered so many I can't even count them. Hundreds after hundreds I massacred. Thousands and thousands loved ones I stole. So many sins I committed. In a way this family deserves to know who I truly am but I am too selfish to tell them. I pretend in front of them hoping that my past would just be something I left behind at the time of my death but some memories can never be forgotten, some mistakes can never be undone, some sins can never be atoned for, some regrets can never be erased, some changes can never be reversed. In world full of war its hard to protect your morality. On the battle field it's either kill or die but even so the things I did could never be justified. If I could just travel back in time there is so much I could have changed but then again God made Time irreversible. They call me Chandni but I am darkness itself. The gentleness of Moonlight I could never get, the purity of Moonlight I could never get, the beauty of Moonlight I could never get. I had always been the one in the shadows and that's where I belong. Maybe this life is a mistake, a mistake made by God himself maybe giving me a chance is a mistake, maybe asking me to change is a mistake, maybe giving me a life even the first time was a mistake. I gazed out of my window on the site of the city, tiny lights sparkling. Where am I? What am I doing here? This is not the place I belong. I belong in hell. Sometimes I just wanna disappear. Disappear into thin air. Disappear so no one could find me. Erased from everyone's memories. No matter where I am, how I am, what I am, there is this one constant unwavering feeling 'Sometimes I just want to disappear.'