"Jo-Pil," she asked, "...why does the idea of them turning away… hurt more than the idea of them leaving?"
The difference between them turning away and leaving... Huh?
The question sat terrifyingly on my chest like a cannonball.
Because if they left peacefully, maybe it meant it wasn't my fault.
But if they turned their backs in anger, disgust, disappointment
It meant I deserved it. It meant I did something wrong, something they could never forgive me for.
"I…" My voice trembled. "I can handle being lonely. But I can't handle being someone people regret loving. I can't look into the eyes that hate me. I just can't."
The silence that followed wasn't empty.
It was heavier than the words I had just dropped.
Finally, Dr. Hye-Marin spoke, her voice steady and rooted:
