"People who carry weight that long," she said, "...usually build a way of surviving. Humor, distance, caretaking, charm… Does any of that sound familiar?"
I lifted my eyes.
It was as if she was describing me through and through.
"I may not know what you're going through or the realm your state is in, but it sounds like you've been carrying that load on your shoulder for a long time. Worry, fear, pain..."
I felt my insides tremble.
"Tell me, Jo-Pil," she continued, voice quiet but steady, "when you're alone—truly alone—without someone to entertain or take care of… How do you feel?"
My throat tightened.
The room wasn't loud but somehow the silence pressed on every inch of my skin.
How do I feel when I'm alone?
Lonely.
Terrified.
Like the walls will cave in and crush me. Like everyone will suddenly disappear from my life and I'll be left in the dark.
But I said none of those.
