Darkness.
That was the only thing around me.
Endless darkness.
My breathing, which was completely out of rhythm, and the drumming of my heart there the only sounds I could hear.
Once upon a time I might have cried or screamed but not anymore.
There was no voice left in me.
Silence.
Darkness.
The warmth of my knees at my chest, from having crouched down on the floor.
Was the floor cold?
Was it warm?
I don't know.
My head is empty.
Breath in and out.
Trying to find a rhythm again.
Darkness.
Absolute darkness.
Suddenly, the temperature seemed to drop.
I barely had noticed it before but this drop in temperature was definitely there.
It always came abruptly.
Chills started running down my spine endlessly, trying to warn me of the danger already here.
To late.
They there here again.
I try not to move.
Make no sound.
Hold my breath to hide myself.
The pounding of my heart and the rush of blood through my veins.
Silence.
Darkness.
Coldness.
Hide.
The only thought left in my mind.
Suddenly, laughter.
"Are you really trying to hide yourself right know?", the voice drenched with sarcasm and amusement.
My demons are here again.
We both know, that there is no place to hide here.
But still, perhaps if I stay completely silent and don't move, he may not see me in the darkness.
Foolish thoughts.
Of course he sees me.
He always sees me.
The darkness only hides him, making his voice sound like a ghost.
The only reason I know he is moving around is that his voice is closer in one moment then in the other, the next one it goes into some distance again.
"Your so funny, you know. There is no place for you to hide or escape to. Why are you even trying? Just accept it and stop waiting like some fool. No one besides us will ever come. You know that just as well as me."
Laughter again.
"He is barely shivering. Have you lost your edge?", the second voice.
Colder then the first one, but not less hurtful.
I'm scared.
I'm trembling terribly.
I think I do.
I can't see it.
I can't hold my breath any longer.
My lungs hurt.
My voice is there again.
"Please leave me alone."
My whisper, so quiet no one would hear it.
It's so hard.
The words felt like stones that I barely managed to caugh up.
Help.
Silence.
Darkness.
Are they gone?
Then laughter, even louder then before.
I can easily images them holding theier stomachs.
Of course they only gave me false hope again.
"Did you listen to yourself? You want us to disappear? You're way to funny for that.", the first voices says, the words disrupted by laughter.
I know.
I know, that they won't disappear no matter what I do.
I have long since lost all control or power.
Theier mocking continues.
I can't understand the exact words anymore, but each one hurts like being pierced with a knife in the stomach.
Help.
Please, if there exist a god, please stop this.
I beg.
I pray.
No sound escapes my lips anymore.
Stop.
I just want everything to stop.
But I know that there is no end.
Never.
My demons come to mock me in this endless darkness and I can't escape.
Never.
Once upon a time I hoped that it would stop someday if I just endured, but the hope has already left me.
The end.
If only it could come to me.
If only I wouldn't be able to feel anything anymore.
Everything might be fine again then.