The classic greeting might have come late, but it arrived all the same, leaving Jane Yu both amused and exasperated.
She decided to breeze through this obligatory ritual as quickly as possible, then, curiosity piqued, asked,
"So, what are you actually doing in Diagon Alley?"
Percy puffed out his chest even further, speaking with unmistakable pride.
"I've been promoted! That proposal we discussed last time—about market quality supervision? Minister Bones was very impressed!"
The glow of career success seemed to radiate from him as he continued,
"Just last week, I was officially appointed head of the newly established Department of Magical Goods Market Supervision. I'm responsible for overseeing all the shops in Diagon Alley—making sure they aren't trading in goods banned by law, running spot-checks on product quality, and so on. Sadly, we're a bit short-staffed at the moment, otherwise Minister Bones would probably have ordered a full sweep of Knockturn Alley—you know how many incidents there have been over there."
"Of course, in times like these, every legitimate shop in a prosperous area has to register with the Ministry. Only registered shops receive official protection, which reassures the public and boosts the Ministry's credibility. So I'm also covering some Auror duties—my team and I patrol the area daily. If any Death Eaters dare show their faces here, I'll alert the Ministry at once and protect the shopkeepers and customers."
No wonder Fred and George had been so eager for her to visit—they needed help dealing with their "local regulator," Percy.
Jane Yu suddenly understood.
"Congratulations on your promotion!" she said warmly. "That's a huge step in your career. Gold shines wherever it goes—Minister Bones must really appreciate your talents!"
"Ah, well, I wouldn't say gold…" Percy's face flushed that familiar shade of pink. "Just doing my job, really… If anyone's appreciated, it's you. I've heard all about what happened at Azkaban—taking down so many Dementors single-handed, breaking through a Death Eater encirclement… The whole Ministry's talking about it. Loads of people want to meet you…"
It had to be said, the workplace had taught Percy a thing or two—he'd picked up a decent knack for professional flattery.
A bit flustered, Percy picked up the hefty ledger beside him and idly flipped through its densely filled pages.
As he did, a sheet of paper slipped out and fluttered to Jane Yu's feet.
She bent down and saw it was a survey of all sorts of goods sold in Diagon Alley shops, with each item's intended use noted—some ticked, some crossed out.
"Ah, another assignment," Percy said, hurriedly scooping up the paper and tucking it back in the ledger. "I've got a big job from Minister Bones—ordering protective gear for Ministry staff. I've spent a whole week shopping under the pretext of market supervision."
His face reddened further, clearly embarrassed at not having fulfilled the Minister's request.
"Nothing suitable. Not a single thing," he grumbled. "Just ordinary wizard robes and hats, maybe a bit of waterproofing if you're lucky. I bought a robe—guess what? I tore it apart with my bare hands. As for curse protection, forget it. They're not even as useful as Canary Creams—at least those let you turn into a bird and escape if things go wrong."
"Oi!" Fred interrupted, grinning as he fished out two Spell-Shielding Hats from a box. "Officer, your loyal brothers' very own Spell-Shielding Hats! If they're up to scratch, just sign off our paperwork, will you?"
"And with a golden business opportunity like this," George chimed in, "it'd be even better if you brought your poor, starving brothers along for the ride!"
Faced with a potential Ministry contract, the twins instantly transformed into "loyal" and "starving" little brothers.
"Spell-Shielding Hats?" Percy picked one up between finger and thumb, scowling as he tossed it aside. "I've seen these before. At best, they'll bounce back a minor jinx—if you're looking the caster in the eye! Are you expecting people to exchange longing gazes with Death Eaters during a duel?"
The sight of the hat made his heart ache; thinking of his brothers' exam scores only made it worse.
"I hear your Defence Against the Dark Arts marks have dropped to failing in just two years? And you didn't even take Alchemy? No wonder you can't make anything advanced! If you'd actually studied, you wouldn't be stuck making children's toys!"
When knowledge is needed, one regrets not studying harder—the poor twins were struck by the boomerang of their own academic laziness.
"That was Umbridge's fault!" they protested in unison. "It's criminal—buying extra textbooks is expensive! Is it too late to go back to Hogwarts and beg Professor Dumbledore for remedial lessons?"
Jane Yu picked up another hat, tore open the lining, and examined the magical circuitry and sealed spells inside.
What she found was a simple, roughly bent copper wire rune circuit containing a small Shield Charm. Due to poor inscription and weak magic output, the shield only worked in front of the wearer, and much of its effectiveness was lost.
It had to be said: when it came to alchemy, runes, and magical item crafting, the wizarding world's knowledge and skills often failed to spread or be passed down, whether due to information blockades or family secrets.
If she applied the rune technology from her Magical Game Console to equipment manufacturing, the quality of this hat's protection could jump several levels.
"If I can't find anything better, I might really have to submit these Spell-Shielding Hats to Minister Bones."
Percy picked up the hat he'd discarded, dangling it between two fingers and looking utterly dejected.
"Five hundred hats, and this is all I can get for the team. Most of them are fresh out of school, and we've got to face Death Eaters who throw Unforgivable Curses around like confetti. They say the Death Eaters wear family heirloom anti-curse gear—it's like sending babies who can't walk to fight grown wizards. Minister Bones gave me such an important job, and this is all I can manage. Sigh—"
He broke off, staring in shock as Jane Yu raised her wand!
The copper wire inside the hat seemed to come alive, slowly twisting and stretching into a strange, joined pattern resembling "Eih." Then a flurry of enhanced Shield Charms, Cushioning Charms, and other unknown spells flashed through, turning the wire bright white, then orange-yellow. The wire kept extending, adding a "Run"-like symbol after the "Eih," and intricate fine lines branched out, densely covering the entire inner lining of the hat.
"Still not good enough," Jane Yu said, frowning at the hat. "Copper wire's cheap, but it's poor at channeling and storing magic. Silver would be much better. And with a proper alchemy table, the pattern would be far more refined and complete, not this crude. As it is, it might block a single Imperius Curse before the hat loses effectiveness, and the Shield Charm can't precisely reflect minor hexes—it could even hit allies by mistake."
But Percy was already lost in joy, having completely forgotten to maintain his dignified expression. His grin was so wide it could barely be contained, every wrinkle in his brow smoothed out, his face flushed scarlet with excitement as he let out a string of uncharacteristically silly exclamations—"Merlin's lace stockings!" "Merlin's enormous bloomers!"—words he'd never utter on a normal day.
Deciding two fingers were too disrespectful, he cradled the hat in his left palm and gently stroked it with his right fingertips, as if terrified of damaging it. He'd completely forgotten it was just a well-shaped, curse-resistant wizard's hat.
He looked ready to propose to it on the spot.
Even Jane Yu shivered at the dreamy, lovestruck look he gave the hat.
"Good thing Penelope isn't here," she muttered.
"Penelope?" Percy, even in his happiness, caught the word. "She should be at the Department of Mysteries now. Ever since she published her paper on time research, she got an offer as an Unspeakable. We get to commute together every day now."
The three of them all looked at Percy, who was practically radiating pink bubbles, with pained expressions.
Success in both career and love—somehow, it just made his face seem all the more punchable.
"Don't keep the good stuff to yourself—let me have a look! Oi—Percy, what are you—?!"
Fred, surprised, tried to snatch the hat for a closer look, only to be met with a swift and brutal counterattack!
Percy hid the hat behind his back with one hand and drew his wand with the other, hanging his brother upside down.
"Don't touch!" he bellowed, as if the hat were a beloved he'd die to protect and his brothers were some kind of disaster. "What are you planning to do to it?"
"We just want a look!" Fred rolled his eyes. "Percy, your face is as red as a baboon's backside—are you really that sensitive?"
"Don't think I don't know what you're up to!" Percy glared, wary. "You say you just want a look, then you start taking it apart, and before you know it, it's gone! You've been like this since you were children—Dad's magical toys never lasted a night!"
He knocked down George too, who'd been trying to sneak up from behind, sending both twins yelping.
When he got serious, Percy truly showed his top-student credentials and big-brother authority—his earlier flustered "battered public official" look was gone, replaced by a transformed paladin.
After the twins surrendered, hands raised in defeat, he returned to his usual self, remembering to keep up appearances.
"…This is the sort of gear the Ministry needs. If we send our Commissioners and Aurors into battle against Death Eaters in ordinary robes and hats, we might as well send them out starkers!"
"Oi! Percy, is that proper?" Fred and George shot back with his own words. "What sort of filth is that? Is it right? Is it decent? Is it suitable to say in front of underage Jane?"
Percy's face, having just cooled, went crimson again. He began to stammer an apology, then quickly changed the subject.
"In any case, Jane, you've been a huge help! Do you have time to come to the Ministry with me and report to Minister Bones?"
Jane Yu understood this was a very positive sign—it meant "government contracts" were likely on the horizon!
It was a win-win-win: with orders, funding, and the endorsement of the wizarding world's highest authority, it would be good for the Ministry's Aurors and Commissioners' safety, her own company's new production line, and the reputation of the newly founded W&J Wizarding Wheezes.
She didn't hesitate for a second and readily agreed.
"Oi! And our shop paperwork!" Fred butted in. "Don't forget to sign and stamp it for us!"
"What filth? That's not right, not decent, and certainly not suitable for minors!" Percy's mouth twisted in disapproval, his nose wrinkling as he seized the chance to get his own back. "I tell you now, I absolutely will not allow any nude statues of You-Know-Who or Death Eaters in my jurisdiction! Absolutely not!"
"Ahem, I think we can avoid that," Jane Yu interjected. "I'm actually quite optimistic about this joke shop's future—I've made a special investment."
Percy's eyebrow twitched, and his mouth, previously downturned, immediately lifted into a 15-degree smile, his expression brightening in an instant.
"You should have told me sooner!" he said, switching to the polished workplace flattery he'd picked up over the years. "My brothers are lucky to have your guidance and investment—it's a blessing for them! The Weasley family is honoured!"
He put on a stern face and looked down his nose at the twins, his gaze sweeping over them with disdain.
"In that case, you'll receive your signed and stamped business licence from me tomorrow."
Seeing the twins flash their familiar "all according to plan" grins, his anger flared again as he scolded,
"Behave yourselves! Jane giving you guidance is your good fortune! If I come back and find any improper nonsense in your shop, don't blame me for telling Mum—she'll have you buried by tomorrow!"
Having achieved their aim, the twins cheerfully agreed, and as soon as Percy turned away, they started winking furiously at Jane Yu.
Years of sibling warfare meant Percy was ready—he spun round, catching the twins' ridiculous faces without surprise.
A surge of righteous fury shot straight to the top of his head, but unfinished business kept him sane. He glared, gritting his teeth:
"When Jane and I get back from the Ministry, you two are in for it!"
~~~~❃❃~~~~~~~~❃❃~~~~
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