Ann closed the notebook slowly. "But one night, I broke. I just broke. I told God, 'I can't keep doing this. I don't know who I am anymore.' And in that moment, something shifted. Not instantly… but something changed. I stopped praying out of guilt and started praying for grace. I stopped hiding and started seeking."
A tear rolled down her cheek. "I gave my life back to Christ. Not because I got holy overnight… but because I realized I *needed* Him even in my filth. Especially in my filth."
Felicia reached out and held her hand. "Ann…"
"I didn't tell you because I thought you'd look at me differently," she said.
"I should have known better," Felicia whispered. "But I'm proud of you. Thank you for telling me."
Ann looked at Felicia's hand wrapped around hers. It was warm. Comforting. But nothing compared to the warmth she felt the day she truly surrendered everything to God.
"You know what's crazy?" she said, wiping a tear. "The day I gave my life to Christ again… I didn't even feel qualified. I was still shaky. I still didn't trust myself. But I was tired of feeling like I had to be perfect before coming to Him."
Felicia nodded. "You came as you were."
"Yes," Ann whispered. "Exactly. And He accepted me like that. Dirty, broken, confused… and He didn't just hug me. He started cleaning me from the inside out."
For weeks after that encounter, Ann said, things were not easy. The urges didn't disappear immediately. There were still thoughts, still dreams, still temptations. But her response changed. She no longer fought from guilt—she fought from grace.
"I began to fast, Felicia," she said, her eyes glowing with passion. "Not just from food, but from content that stirred up those urges. I unfollowed some people on Instagram. I changed my playlist. I stopped sleeping in total darkness. I didn't wait for temptation to come—I started building walls against it."
Felicia smiled. "So you went into war."