The Candy Kingdom was a blur of neon frosting and joyful screams. "Candy Party! Jake! This party is so crazy!" Finn yelled, dodging a group of dancing cupcakes.
"I know, Finn! I know!" Jake laughed, his body wobbling like yellow jelly.
Kael stood near the punch bowl, his Accelerated Learning taking in the scene. He saw Cinnamon Bun attempt a backflip, only to stumble and crack the tower wall. The crack raced upward like a lightning bolt toward the balcony where Princess Bubblegum was dancing. As the stone gave way, the Princess fell.
"Princess Bubblegum's in trouble!" Finn screamed. He dove through the crowd, catching her just inches from the ground.
"Thank you, Finn," the Princess whispered, her eyes shining. "You truly are my hero this day. And that gives me an idea..."
She led the three brothers to a brick wall. "Turn around, everyone," she commanded the crowd. "This entrance is secret." Once the Candy People turned their backs, she pulled a brick, revealing a dark tunnel. "Math. Hurry!"
Inside her secret chamber, she pulled a yellow globe from a chest. An image of a legendary book appeared within the glass. "It's called the Enchiridion," she explained. "A book for heroes whose hearts are righteous. It lies at the top of Mount Cragdor, guarded by a manly minotaur."
"Do you think I've got the goods, Bubblegum?" Finn asked, his eyes wide.
"Yes, I do," she smiled.
"Then off I go!" Finn leaped out the window, Jake stretching up to catch him. Kael followed, sliding down Jake's back. "Adventure time, bros!"
At the base of Mount Cragdor, they met a strange creature named the Key-per. "First, you must pass my riddle," he giggled. "The key is in you, child, but you cannot use your brawn here."
Kael squinted at the lock. His Elemental Attunement picked up a strange vibration. "Finn, the riddle isn't a puzzle. It's a joke."
Finn didn't hesitate. He picked up the Key-per, stuffed the creature's head into the keyhole, and turned him like a literal key. Click.
"Brilliantly done!" Key-per cheered. "Please, reveal how you unraveled my clue!"
"I just thought you'd look cute stuffed in that lock," Finn shrugged.
"Oh, yes," Key-per sighed. "That's how most people get in."
The Gnomes and the Illusions
As they climbed, Jake sniffed the air. "Enchiridion is... that way. In a room. Wish you had a nose like mine, huh?"
Suddenly, voices cried for help. Finn sprinted toward a lava pit where three gnomes were trapped. He pulled them out, only for the gnomes to turn menacing. "Now we can destroy this old lady!" they shrieked, zapping a lady tied to a stake until she vanished.
"What?!" Finn shouted.
"Every time you say 'what,' we'll destroy an old lady!" the Red Gnome yelled. They began zapping ladies for every word Finn spoke or every sad face he made. Finn fell to his knees, devastated. "I'm not righteous. I'm wrongteous..."
"Finn, look at them using your brain, not just your eyes," Kael said, stepping forward. He touched the ground, feeling the lack of heat from the "lava." "The vibration is hollow. There's no heat. Jake, tell him."
"Kael's right," Jake added. "Think, Finn. What would sweet old ladies be doing on Mount Cragdor? None of this is real. It's just a trial to mess with your head."
Finn blinked, his spirit returning. "Yeah! You're the smartest brothers I know!"
Their path was blocked by a giant Ogre who promptly ate Jake. "Gimme back my friend!" Finn yelled, kicking the ogre's foot.
"Impossible to hurt me!" the Ogre laughed.
Kael watched the Ogre's movements. "Finn, he's too big to fight directly. Go for his wallet!"
Finn climbed the ogre, snatched a giant dollar bill, and used it as a hang-glider to soar into the sky. "Give me back my friend or I'll keep your big money!"
"But I killed him already!" the Ogre lied. Finn, heartbroken, performed a flying kick into the Ogre's stomach, causing him to retch. Jake flew out in a cloud of stomach goo. "Stomachs are weird!" Jake cheered.
As they reached the temple doors, Finn looked back at the crying Ogre. In a final act of righteousness, he folded the giant dollar into a paper airplane and sailed it back to its owner. "That was righteous, Finn," Jake said proudly.
The Final Trial
Inside the temple, a Dark Magician appeared. "Enter my brain-world!" He transported Finn into a misty void. "For your final trial, slay the beast!"
A giant Heart-Beast landed. "Is it evil?" Finn asked.
"Yeeeeessss," the Magician hissed.
Finn destroyed the beast with a flurry of punches. "Now!" the Magician cried. "Slay this ant! It is not evil, but it is not good. It is neutral!"
Finn raised his fist, but stopped. The ant looked up at him. "No!" Finn shouted.
"Slay the unaligned ant if you want the book!"
"Never! Never! Never!"
Finn woke up in the real world and promptly kicked the Dark Magician in the crotch. The cloak fell away to reveal the Key-per in devil pajamas. "I was getting ready for bed!" he complained.
Suddenly, the Mannish Man the manly minotaur ran in laughing. "You made it! We've been watching you on our globe!"
He led them to a picnic table and pulled out the ancient book. "The Enchiridion! You deserve it, Finn. You're the most righteous hero I've seen. Tenderness, bravery, and nard-kicking ability!"
Finn cracked open the book. "Whoa... 'How to Kiss Princesses'?" He giggled, glancing at the viewing globe where Bubblegum was watching.
"Don't tell her what it says," Mannish Man whispered.
"It doesn't say anything, Princess!" Finn yelled, leaping into the air with his new treasure. Kael smiled, leaning against the temple wall. The book was theirs, and Finn's heart was officially proven to be made of gold.